i am scanning through websites
my attention lint like
tenacious
refusing to be moved from this subject
pictures of children raised by dogs
my own dogs at ease on the sofa raised by humans
one smiles at me
a new expression he's just learned
I wonder at this, and wonder at my wondering
my dictionary a hot mess
binding long gone it sits in two pieces
my own words never close at hand
always far far away only coming to me as if a slow moving train through a tunnel
these words strike me, wrap me, and i fall beneath their blow
these children do not need words
do not want people
most escape back into the wild except one
she doesn't bond with her mongrel pup and wants only people to engage with
that is nagging at me, digging at me with a wrongness I can't wrap my head around
hyblaean- Julie
- Location
- Chicagoish, Illinois, USA
- Birthday
- September 30
- Bio
- 40; army brat; bisexual... still living with my ex partner (uhm, it's complicated?); perpetually confused, which makes me look like i'm doing a ditzy act, but actually it's not put on; middle class in cash if not culture (freaking finally); INFP/INFJ; SSRI, lithium, nicotine lozenge and caffeine dependent. Driven to laziness, odd fits of needing to 'fix' things, subthreshold hypomanic moments of productiveness (rarely) and random weirdness (often).
---------------------------
If you have regular suicidal thoughts, please try lithium. It's worth a shot and has worked wonders for me.
MY RECENT POSTS
- ARGGG- Greenheron's challenge
May 24, 2012 11:03AM - plowed and planted, harvested
and barren
May 15, 2012 05:37AM - off to work
May 14, 2012 03:19PM - stfu
May 01, 2012 07:58AM - i love you
April 17, 2012 09:43PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “how to approach writing
as a computer scientist
:)
My rules for
writing can be
su…”
1:56PM - “http://open.salon.com/bl
og/cranky_cuss/2012/05/27/for_
memorial_day_let_there_be_l
230;”
1:41PM - “I don't have an hour
before work, but will view
this when I
get home. Fitting
tri…”
1:36PM - “pestilential?
*high
fives Amy*
Amy you are so
lucky you don't actually have
to be…”
May 27, 2012 12:36AM - “you make me wish I lived
near the ocean. God how
beautiful it
is”
May 26, 2012 07:30PM
Hyblaean- Julie's Links
- New list
- * Give 'em food- quick, easy, free
- * PollenNation- Brian Mahieu is a god
- * my favorite psych nurse
- * crewel kits- I love to buy them, actually completing them is a different matter
- * daylily auction
- * breeding for the perfect daylily
- * for some reason crochet terrifies me- 2 sticks, easy- one stick, trouble
- Os people's favorite books
- CSS help
- Mikel's poem nuggets

Salon.com
Comments
I am going to read this on tomorrow's blog if that is okay.
Loved it and rated with hugs
rated
rated
"my own words never close at hand
always far far away only coming to me as if a slow moving train through a tunnel
these words strike me, wrap me, and i fall beneath their blow"
always far far away only coming to me as if a slow moving train through a tunnel...
i have the same trouble. i think it is my
"morality" that gets in the way of
receiving my best thoughts.
then i wonder who
my morality serves:
all my acquaintances laugh when i try to be noble.
meanwhile,
in my head,\
i block thoughts like a hockey goalie.
you are one bog-hearted soul,woman.