Although there is not much I like about being fifty years old, there is one quality about being middle aged that I truly appreciate and treasure. I am abundantly more confident about who I am which means I am more free to express my love for others. I like that!
If I want to tell someone I love them, man or woman, I just do it... without the fears that used to freeze me and make me question every motive. As a matter of fact, now, I almost feel compelled to tell people that I love them. Why not tell them? Why would I want to keep my love for another human being to myself? What good does that do? Because of my age, I am not afraid to express myself....I am not afraid to be me and to tell the truth....especially when that truth concerns letting someone know that I care and love him/her. The way I see it, expressing love for someone makes ME feel good. It adds joy to my life. Hopefully, the person I'm expressing my love to, is also feeling happier and a little taller knowing that he/she is loved. In my opinion, it's a "win-win" situation. Both parties gain.
When I was younger, I wouldn't dare express myself like that....especially when it came to affection for someone. What would they think? I didn't want to scare them away or make them think I was some lunatic. I didn't want women to think I'm gay and I didn't want men to think I was coming on to them. God forbid!
Also when I was younger, my concept of love was very limited and restricted to only family and close friends....and only to female friends. I didn't want some guy to get the wrong idea or take advantage of my feelings. I was ever so careful who I said, "I love you" to as though those three words would cause WWIII if I happened to say them to the wrong people!
Not only has my definition of love expanded beyond family and close friends, I also realize more now, than ever, that there are various kinds of love and various levels of it, too.
Basically, there are three types of love:
Eros, which is what Hollywood is all about. Eros (erotic) is the sexual or romantic love. Even though I have experienced this kind of love, it is extremely limiting for me because I don't want to hop in bed with every person I love!
Phileo love is a brotherly love toward someone we really like. I feel that this type of love actually opens more doors to whom I can love simply because I like and enjoy lots of people. Sex doesn't have to be involved.
Agape love is my favorite because it allows me to love anyone and everyone as much as I want to. As a matter of fact, Agape is the deepest love we should strive for because it's based on doing good things for others. It is the closest we are going to get to God Himself.....especially since God is Love.
It hit me the other day that if I can express Agape love to my family, friends, acquaintances, neighbors etc... then I can also include the strangers in my life ....the individuals whom I've never met. If I can see myself and my loved ones in the face of the stranger, I will truly be able to extend my Agape love to everyone around me including those around the world.
Perhaps if more people could love with Agape love, there would be no wars and only abundant peace. Wouldn't that be incredible? Wouldn't that be like heaven? I think so.
I love you, my OpenSalon friends!