So the other day my friend Annie pointed out to me that Mr. Fancy Food Pants Francis Lam (Lam Chop to moi) was trying to be all cool with his little competition for Grilled Cheese recipes. At first I was all "Whatever with that." Franny Fancy Pants, who was too good to participate in my Vintage Recipe Card Showdown, is playing hip kid and is pretending he likes processed cheese foods, but I know he's faking it. If his cheese is not aged in a cave and full of mold, or melted on bread made by the arthritic hand of an aging blind monk, he's so not going to eat it. But I'm a good sport, and a fan of cheese in all it's processed glory, especially aerosol form, so I'll play.
I'm a purist. No, I didn't say I'm pure. Don't be an idiot. I believe that all this fancifying of grilled cheese sandwiches that you see lately is just pure nonsense. Hipster chefs are adding it to their menus. Heck there's even a Grilled Cheese Invitational. They are putting all kinds of fancy cheeses and meats in their sandwiches like you can actually improve upon the original recipe. You can't. You want that fancy shit, go get a panini and get off my blog.
Most of us, unless your parents were vegan whackos or lactose intolerable, were fed traditional grilled cheese sandwiches as a kid. These were a staple of our diets and one of the original comfort foods. Today, they are my preferred meal when I've got a migraine or a hangover, and Dave excels at whipping them up for me.
Grilled Cheese Recipe
2 slices of bread, preferably unhealthy white bread with no nutritional valueA lot of butter
2 rubbery slices of American Cheese (I prefer Kraft Deli Deluxe myself)
Heat a large dollop of butter in a frying pan. Slather bread with butter and put one piece in the pan. Layer slices of processed cheese like goodness on bread and top with other slathered piece of white bread.
Cook, flipping to achieve a golden brown color on both pieces of bread and until cheese is nicely melted.
Because this is the food of the gods, it seems only appropriate that in my house, despite the fact that we're heretics, my favourite pop-culture idol, the Virgin Mary regularly makes an appearance on my sandwiches.
We're tight she and I. I have a shrine in my guest bathroom to her.




Salon.com
Comments
rated
and now I feel hungry.
I almost took a nap.
iamsurly liking Lam.
Francis reminds me?
My Ma was a Frances.
I can't comment there.
I am poky pork chops.
I ate bacon at age sixty.
O Ma, grave mortal sin.
Who was it @ O.Sin.com?
They put pork chop in pants?
Someone did. Maybe a editor?
Baptist Jews Love iamsurly too.
Thanks. Big smile. I go sip tisane.
Teas are my favorite beverage.
Camel meal tea. Some.
Jest a tiny thimble full.
Ava Maria. Hail Merry.
crap. now it's going to be twice but the first one's wrong - I was excited - god.
**runs crying into the deep dark woods**
glad that iamsurly
spiels Stellaa write.
Lawyers hate Cambell's rice
homemade mead with fleas
Camel eyelash hair in strew
One definition of 'Feta' is crumbly
Mundane, and if you cough in bed
Miracles is you prey to Tink again
Weather one prays to gang member
Chic restaurant chefs, bistro kooks
typo
N 'k'
Cook
Camel
for dessert
We can always divorce cranky spouses who burn the bacon and grilled cheese.
I do have a belly ache.
I'll see Stellaa's therapist.
Holy Ma Ma was not bad.
She was not a bad crook.
She was not a snooper.
She wasn't evolved in`
Watergate.
Mom cooked shoo fly
Mom's pies were great
Vampires love fangs
Eat pie with hands
Pass oral culinary
I may go vomits
I do have a gurgle in my tummy.
On this second read of comment?
I confess i burn rummaged toast.
The miraculous relic
sand which is a broach
and I love blue blouses.
iamsurly captures a lard.
Lard of heaven and earth.
Thanks for the epiphanies.
I'll stuff Feta in the toaster.
I hope the good lard blesses.
Maybe I'll see a thyme herbs.
This deserves papal research.
O wear tomatoes to barrooms.
Stellaa? Pizza pie hats look cool.
You can feeds folks in the ghetto.
You are luminous as any miracle.
You detail extraordinary breads.
You can go with me to dumpster.
Forrest Gump was from Savanna.
I bet we find a half-bits chocolate.
Let's bum loot and erect church's.
You know how? Mix cement mud.
DCs lawyers can be better mason.
My only change is that I use Tillamook cheddar instead of Kraft American. The pre-sliced kind. I cannot slice cheese without ending up sans a finger or with slices that are an inch thick.