Ill Will and Everything Else in New York

Because Life is Too Tragic to be Anything but Funny
APRIL 2, 2011 9:54PM

How to Negotiate a Better Deal with Sirius XM Radio

Some of you have asked me how to manipulate Sirius XM Radio into getting past the $12.95 per month subscription rate.  Here is a transcript of a conversation with their customer service representative.

CS:         Sirius XM Radio. How can I help you?

YO… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 16, 2011 12:22AM

House GOP Leaders: Spelunk Uteri to Balance the Budget

 

Congressman Paul Ryan (R) breaks through the uterine wall of an indigent non-white woman

 

WASHINGTON, D.C., February 16 -- As it turns out, vaginas aren't just for frakking anymore!  At least that's what House Budget Committee Chairman Representative Paul Ryan insisted at a press briefing earlier today.

"President Obama has failed to show the initiative of a tr… Read full post »

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JULY 27, 2010 10:52PM

NYS Senate to Legalize Ultimate Fighting in NYS Senate

    ALBANY, N.Y., July 29 -- A Wednesday vote went the right way for sports enthusiasts in Albany.  For the first time in years, mixed martial arts boxing will be legal in the State Senate.  After the 32-25 senate vote, the bill will go to the State… Read full post »
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JUNE 17, 2010 10:24PM

Rep. Nixon Apologizes to Führer Dönitz for U.S. Imposition

BERLIN, October 10 – In a subcommittee hearing this morning, freshman Congressman Richard Nixon (R-CA) formally apologized to surviving Third Reich leader Karl Dönitz for invading occupied France.

Rep. Nixon in Session

   Bucking the trend of blaming Nazi
   leadership for inva

… Read full post »
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JUNE 5, 2010 12:30AM

NBC: Gary Coleman to Star in Fall Situation Comedy

  NEW YORK, June 7 -- Former child star Gary Coleman will be starring in a brand-new show in NBC's Fall 2010 lineup, according to NBC spokesmen.  The situation comedy, "Book Learnin'" will feature Mr. Coleman as a community college professor who inspires inner-city children to… Read full post »

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MAY 29, 2010 12:43AM

Bartering for Healthcare - A True Story (almost)

While many liberals are either laughing at or flummoxed by Nevada senatorial candidate Sue Lowden’s idea to barter with doctors for healthcare, I would have to say her idea has some merit. 
 
I know of an example when my friend, a podiatrist, was called to… Read full post »
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MAY 28, 2010 9:36PM

Message from the Border: We Don't Want You Here

As politically correct as I like to think I am, there are certain types of people that I just can’t abide. They come from a region that is known as lawless and corrupt, rife with all kinds of gambling, prostitution and drug dealing. They come… Read full post »
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MAY 22, 2010 11:01PM

NYS Gov to Slash Alphabet in Latest Budget-Cutting Scheme

ALBANY, NY -- Governor David Paterson (D-NY), in an effort to make up a budget shortfall of almost $18 billion, has declared that he will cut state funding for vowels.  In a press conference in Albany, Governor Paterson announced the cuts that will affect the classic

… Read full post »
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