Irene Barnett's Blog
Irene Barnett
- Location
- Santa Barbara, California,
- Birthday
- September 23
- Bio
- Wherein I share some personal information with you in the 3rd party voice of Morgan Freeman – please adjust your internal audio accordingly.
Irene Barnett is a working co-parent of twin boys named Drew and Sean. Her partner in the lunacy of raising children is Jim, a lovely, mild-mannered balance to her impatience, irritability and general weirdness. Irene is currently making the rent by assuming the identity of a high-powered executive for a software consulting firm that is based out of Seattle while she really tries to live the life of a writer in Santa Barbara, CA.
Check out more of her rants at http://leftofplumb.com/
MY RECENT POSTS
- Cap’n Crunch And The
Weakening of Our Youth
April 25, 2013 07:08PM - The Wall of Confusion
April 17, 2013 11:19AM - If Lunacy Had a Soundtrack It
Would Go Something Like This
April 11, 2013 08:24PM - Hitting Publish – My Year of
Living Dangerously
April 03, 2013 06:45PM - Mosh Pits And Incontinence –
Recapturing Youth
April 03, 2013 11:18AM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “Woawoawoawo, and this
bird you can not
change!”
April 12, 2013 02:19AM - “Ben sen, appreciate the
blogging about issues for
sure. I
tend to attempt to
make…”
April 06, 2013 11:39AM - “Dianne, I have had tr ig
visit...and even comment. I
didn't
think it was mean
but…”
April 04, 2013 01:09AM - “Oh, Cranky Cuss, I
really should have known you'd
at least
attempt a
"mean&q…”
April 03, 2013 11:31PM - “Coming a little late to
the party. Beautiful post,
James.
Wonderful writing and
a…”
April 03, 2013 11:13AM
Irene Barnett's Links
Cap’n Crunch And The Weakening of Our Youth
Oh Cap’n, my Cap’n. I am sorely vexed.
I have recently heard what I had hoped was an urban legend - that the original recipe for my favorite weed-induced breakfast cereal has been changed.
I speak, of course, of Cap'n Crunch, Original flavor. Because I require Yellow Dye 5&n… Read full post »
The Wall of Confusion

I wanted to bring the funny this week, but I’m having a hard time with that.
I felt like I wanted to say something about the horrific violence this week but also felt like one more missive about it wasn’t going to necessarily help anyone.
But, it’s kind of like… Read full post »
If Lunacy Had a Soundtrack It Would Go Something Like This

Play Freebird!!
There is nothing weirder than kids. Except maybe parenting kids. That’s just Kim Jong Un weird. You know, unreasonable weird.
I don’t usually like to blog much about being a parent. It’s not that I have an issue with being a parent….who… Read full post »
Hitting Publish – My Year of Living Dangerously
It was one year ago that I wrote my first blog post. I’d invite you all to an awkward first birthday party but I don’t know how to bake a virtual cake. Though I could probably figure out a virtual piñata of sorts.
All of this was really a grand… Read full post »
Mosh Pits And Incontinence – Recapturing Youth
I’ve been fortunate to have accidentally lived in certain cities during their heydays. In the 1980’s I was in Silicon Valley and San Francisco for the high tech and new wave music boom. 1990’s it was Seattle for Microsoft and the grunge movement.
I’m not sure exa… Read full post »
The Stay-At-Home Mom – Your Lady Balls Are Bigger Than Mine

I’ve been asked repeatedly over the years about why I am a working mother. Are we poor? Am I a narcissist? Is your husband a drunk or something?
Of course, the answer to all of these queries is YES. I am a… Read full post »
I Am An Oscar Whore
You see, I am a whore for the Oscars. I am. And, yes, I feel a level of shame in this fact. I’m not necessarily a beautiful, shorn, singing, consumptive whore like Anne Hathaway in Les Miserables. But a whore none the less.

The Golden Globes – My Lady Parts Are All Tingly
I know there is a glut of Golden Globes commentary floating about the web-o-sphere. I also know that I couldn’t pass any opportunity to barf out my opinion if I tried.
I had a lady boner all night for Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.
(I will give credit where it is… Read full post »
The Lohan Paradox – Our Cultural Dust Bowl

It's not looking good, Linds. Not. Looking. Good.
This past Sunday I watched The Dust Bowl by Ken Burns on PBS because that’s the kind of high-falutin’ broad I am.
I’ve always been intrigued by this piece of history because i… Read full post »
An Organized Day of Sloth and Gluttony
Ah, Thanksgiving. It's the official kick-off of the holiday season. Or, as I like to call it, the start of my special 6-week alcohol bender cleanse.
I know this is a little early for a Thanksgiving blog but with the amount of tryptophan and vodka that will be coursing through my… Read full post »
My Election Hangover

I am sure that I am far from alone when I exclaim that I FREAKING HATE ELECTION YEARS. If I hear one more pundit who thinks I give a shit about what they think I’ll literally vomit.
I have often wondered what kind of person becomes a pundit anyway. Were… Read full post »
The Ghost of My Dead Film Career

What, with it being Halloween and all, I figured it was time for a little visit to the dark side. I mean the scary, ghostlike dark side, not the whole excessive body hair thing I usually dive into.
Like the time my sister and I came home from school and… Read full post »
Best Practices For The Remote Worker (Try Not To Be Creepy)
I stopped going into an office every day 18 years ago, so I may be a bit of a pioneer in the field of remote working. At least that’s what I tell everyone because saying I’m lazy and anti-social just doesn’t have the impact I want.
I was fortunate enough… Read full post »
I Was Plucked By The Original Jersey Girl

So, with all the woes of the world, let me tell you the issue I am most outraged by and feel there needs more public awareness around.
My eyebrows.
I realize this may seem like a small issue to many of you but we all need a cause and mine… Read full post »
Celebrity Vomiting: Bad Food Choice Or World Domination?
None of you can possibly think that I could pass up the opportunity to comment on the rash of celebrity vomiting we’ve seen in the past two weeks. It would be no more possible for me to stop the flow of snark than it would be for them to stop… Read full post »
The Gays Will Rule The World

The Revolution will be choreographed
Even this soon in my “career” as a “blogger” I have already pissed off several factions in this, the United States of Lack of Sense of Humor and Sarcasm. I figure there is no point in my stopping now.
So, I’ve been think… Read full post »
Andy Williams, Shelley Winters and Me
I will blame this maudlin exhibit of nostalgia on two events from this past week: I had a birthday and my imaginary childhood husband passed away.
I could launch into a monologue about the Depression and the Great War. But, while I may feel that old, in reality I’m not.… Read full post »
Scenes From a Coffice
INT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY
Disheveled woman dressed in yoga pants and hoodie enters ramshackle coffee shop. It’s a slow-motion scene, reminiscent of a Scorsese film, as the Rolling Stones “Paint It Black” plays in the background.
I see them all looking at me slac… Read full post »
Confessions Of A Chronic Over-sharer
“Everyone is wise until he speaks.”
~ Said by someone who has self control
Let me explain. As if I have to....
I come from a thick-skinned, sarcastic clan of Irish hooligans with excessive body hair who are masters at saying the wrong thing at… Read full post »
Ode to a Brave Husband

I bagged me a keeper!
This week’s blog is all about my lovely husband “Jim” (I still don’t believe that’s his real name). Today we celebrate our 17th wedding anniversary.
And since I couldn't find what the appropriate gift was on the… Read full post »
Crazy Chicken People

You’d never believe this but I have a couple of minor phobias. I know I have just shaken your world with that news flash.
So, let’s start with birds, shall we?
I actually like to watch birds as they soar through the sky and perch in… Read full post »
Hobo With an Attitude
So, I have no doubt this post will cross some lines and incite some sort of riot….because that’s the kind of power I wield.
But, no matter how you feel about the plight of the homeless, our nation's Hobos need to learn some manners.
I will… Read full post »
Finally, Those Dog Names You've Been Needing
Dogs are the new kid. I know this because I’m hopelessly hip and I have observed the uptick in dog-friendly restaurants and the lack of kid-friendly bars.
When Jim and I were childless (also known as our salad days) we had an ongoing game… Read full post »
K-Mart Nipples
This title can go in so many directions….if you went in the dirty direction then shame on you. You know who you are….
When Jim and I were in our darkest hours of depression and sleep deprivation with the whole twins thing, we found ourselves having… Read full post »
Please Stop Annoying Me!
Here’s another list of crap that just hacks me off. Clearly, I don’t get out all that much. And, I probably should just take a Pamprin and call it a day.
(I apologize in advance if any of you loyal readers do this stuff but… Read full post »
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