jackie2

jackie2
Location
Lewisburg, Pennsylvania, USA
Birthday
August 01
Title
Clinical Psychologist
Company
Dr. Jacqueline B. Sallade
Bio
Only child of holocaust survivors from Eastern and Central Europe, grew up in Phila., Central PA, and NYC (2nd home). Psychologist since 1970 working with children and adults in wide variety of selttings, including schools, hospital, courts, private office, and prisons.

Jackie2's Links

Salon.com
MAY 8, 2012 4:14PM

Dr. Jackie's Mental Health Moment-Compromise

Rate: 3 Flag

A healthy, doable life is about compromise. Every day requires some compromise for most people most of the time. You can't spend enough time at the gym, so you compromise by cutting it in half. You can't eat half a pound of candy without getting sick or gaining weight, so you settle for 4 pieces. You can't stay friends comfortably with people who never call first or even call back, so you send a card once a year, an email twice a year, and leave a phone message once or twice and enjoy the friends who stay in touch. You can't always get your spouse to do a lot of chores, so you do some you don't really feel thrilled about. You don't have enough money to travel first class, so you go economy. You choose between two cheap trips or one expensive one. Your spouse/partner wants the latter and you want the former, so you take one cheap trip alone or with a friend and one higher price trip together. Etc.

If you are someone who won't compromise easily, you're in for some major sacrifice and maybe relationship hard times. One young man I know never settles for anything but perfect housework, turning off his girlfriend so much that marriage may never happen. Another guy won't travel unless he can afford the very most high class, so he hardly goes anywhere. A woman requires a lot of attention from her family and friends, not settling for a reasonable amount, which leads them to avoiding her. I'm sure you get it.

So, as you go through your day noticing the things which you can only have halfway, be grateful that you have the sanity and consideration for yourself and your others to compromise.

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Comments

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Very sane and sensible post, Jackie.
Yes. I have noticed that there is a strong correlation between people who refuse to compromise and a lack of intimacy (maybe empathy?).
r./
We all compromise all the time... that's how we manage to get through life. Only pathological control freaks don't compromise... Tea Party Republicans?