FEBRUARY 7, 2012 2:03AM

The Grotesque Ass-Omens of Super Bowl XLVI

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For anyone who believes in omens, America's supreme civic festival is an obvious place to look for them, and what did we see at Super Bowl XLVI?

We saw a fat and clumsy former super-star fall on her ass in the middle of halftime festivities, and then...

The most grotesque winning touchdown in the history of football!

Squat on the goal-line, Ahmad! Then fall slowly backward on your ass! 

Hurrah! 

Super Bowl XLVI is over, and it's maybe a minute to midnight in our dying Republic!

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Actually Jacob I don’t know what you know about football but the reason Bradshaw scored that touchdown like that was because it just may have been the most stupid move in super bowl history. He was supposed to go down on the one and run the clock almost to zero to allow Tynes to kick the winning field goal without leaving Brady time to come back which he came within a Gromkowsky dive for a hail Mary pass of doing.And as far as that pig Madonna performing the halftime show. I ask you now Jacob what could have been more appropriate. Watched the game with dozens of people and when some smug little yuppie from my cousins wife's family started talking about Ron Paul being crazy because he believed 9/11 was staged. I asked him if he had ever done any research on 9/11. Do you know who Dr. Niels Harrit is, Dr Steven Jones, Richard Gage? His smug reply was that people like “us” believe in black helicopters. Well then Jacob at that point I explained to him that those were fighting words and since he was obviously no match for me he should come outside and bring the rest f his family with him. There were no takers Jacob and said yuppie, I can almost guarantee, will never shoot his mouth off like that in mixed company again.
Thanks for that story, Jack! I still spend the holidays with my right-wing cousins, who look at me like I'm a cockroach, but we never ever talk about politics/religion/economics or really anything except what Cousin Bette said to Aunt Matilda.

I understood the reason why that bone-head Ahmad Bradshaw was supposed to fall down anywhere except the endzone, but apart from all possible interpretations, it's still exactly what it was: some bozo squatting on the goal-line and falling on his ass.
red thumb Tacks stuck on` Jacob Freeze's front door ...
`
thirteen red Heart Valentines
CEOs send Jack greeting cards
and Jacob displays Red Hearts
`
Happy Valentines to you two.
Some cards sing lullaby too.
I wish you a Merry Feb-too.
`
Jacob wear a tutu today?
Wash hands after knock?
No touch CEO doorknob.