This was going to be one hell of a chaotic day , but at least it began with wondrous sexplay with Mz. Rena Oblong.
She and I have known each other for only two weeks,but our bodies seem to have an acquaintanceship that predates our actual professional association as teachers in the local high school. Where my old Dad is still principal, after 40 years.
We cannot get enough of each other. In “that’’ way. Postcoitally, we are still working on our relationship. She tends to hunch up in a fetal position for awhile afterward, for still unknown reasons, but fear not, I am on the case.
Like this morning, after we made love in her apartment’s laundry room, on a naughty lark, her clothes drying in the machine she and I traded positions upon. I insisted on locking the door . She ended up hunched naked as usual , on the floor, head against the dryer, out of range.
We had two serious responsibilities today. To visit my parents, where my older sister had arrived for one of her surprise visits, vexing my mom Eleanor because there was no appropriate vegetarian food for her and her boyfriend (more of a ‘common law husband’). All that she had was…ham. Some of which our ancient dog Joseph had stolen in the night, and vomited under mom and dad’s marital bed.
So we had to get some good healthy organic snacks for the visit, and stay at least an hour there.
We also had to visit Rena’s mom, whom I suspected of fucking up Rena good. Rena was giving zero details of what I should expect.
She got up from the laundry room floor and threw my bathrobe at me, as she pulled on her pink puffy robe which made her look like a 12 year old. I wouldn’t mind it if that bathrobe of hers was perhaps ruined by some bleach in the next laundry load. It creeped me out.
We collected the laundry from the dryer and Rena said, “I love the warm clothes, just as they come out, don’t you?” She buried her face in them.
Well, the lady speaks! I thought to myself. I have long ago given up on talking to her after sex. Respect your woman's headspace, no matter how much you want to amble in there & fix everything. For her sake,and for the sake of your own sanity....
I actually did indeed love the warmth, but the clothes were gonna cool down quick. Not as quick as rena, though. I sighed and said, “Should we take a shower before we head out?”
She said, “Nah, I’ll scrub you down and you can reciprocate.”
That worked for me.
She put on her black skirt, stockings, and blouse for the second time this morning, as I squeezed into my khakis and designer t shirt. It was white, and said something terribly hip, but discreetly, on the back.
We headed out.
Sister was sitting in the family room next to her ‘husband’, Mother was primly perched in her rocking chair, Joseph was in the corner looking like he was about to die. Dad was on the patio smoking. Pacing a bit. He and sister were no longer able to communicate about much anymore, since she had gone off to college & become a "damn hippy". That was 30 years ago.
We entered, and I introduced Rena.
“How nice to see you again, Mz. Oblong!” Mom burbled, as if reaching for a life preserver. Her little hands fidgeted in her lap, but eventually came back down to their ladylike arrangement.
Joseph let out an alarming amount of gas , which we all ignored.
Sister seemed tired. Her husband was tired. They had been on the road for 10 hours, coming up from Virginia, where they’d attended a 3 day music festival.
“Jimmy, how are you?” Sister managed. Husband woke up for a minute and came alive.
“Jimbo! Good to see you again! “ It looked like he actually meant it.
“I’m good, “ I said, remembering the laundry room. The smell of bleach.
Rena made a delightfully polite appearance, but I think that sister and her husband didn’t realize she was my girlfriend. I suspect they thought she might be my probation officer.
We chatted about the festival, all the cool folk bands I’d never heard of, and plans to visit up North in Maine with them for the annual film festival. Rena spoke intelligently about some films I had never seen nor ever wished to. Mother eyed the bag Rena held.
Mom said, “Did you bring us some snacks, Mz. Ob..uh, Rena..?”
Rena suddenly remembered her mission. “Oh I did indeed! Check this out…”
A lot of food that we’d gathered from the snotty organic section of Stop N Shop. Sister was immensely impressed, and her husband seemed to gain some animation. I cannot tell you what we bought, for I had no interest in eating. I was terribly nervous about meeting Rena’s mom, and when I am nervous, I starve myself.
The lunch was laid out on Mother's coffee table, after she had carefully removed the family pictures from way way before my time. I was a late child. Mother & Father had had a whole other family existence with my siblings.
Dad out on the porch noticed that food was being shared, and made his entrance. Rather obnoxiously, of course.
“Jimbo! Mizz Oblong! Welcome! Aha, an early lunch, I see!” he said as he looked at poor Joseph, sputtering and burping. He was gonna be ok, I hoped. Dad wasn’t so sure.
“father! Can you put that pipe out?” sister said.
“Oh, yes, my gosh. Sorry sorry. “ He tamped it down and put it in his pocket.
“James,” he boomed, “this dog of yours is not doing well. I advised a vet visit, but you said no. what are your feelings, now you have seen him?”
Mom and sister cringed at his volume. Husband smirked.
I winked at husband..
“Dad, “ I pronounced, “he will be fine. All the ham is out of him. He hasn’t vomited in 4 hours. He took a good ‘number two’, right?”
“Yes, it was a solid shit”
“George!” Mother said.
“Sorry. Number two. Yes. I collected it in a plastic bag, if you want to see. I was terribly concerned.” He rubbed the pipe pocket. I felt a sudden need for a ‘smoke break’ out on the patio with him. To get him out of harm’s way, and to calm his mind. The ladies were getting along smashingly, talking about food. Eating. Whatever it was.
I took Dad out on the patio, and Joseph followed.
We three looked at each other and sighed.
Dad lit up.
I lit up.
Joseph plunked down.
“That damn dog,” Dad said, suddenly using his sane voice. “Are you sure about him?”
“Yep. “ I clapped Dad on the shoulder.
“Ok. Ok. Good. Such a relief. I don’t know what your mother would do without that dog. And I would miss him too.”
We smoked on this.
“so, “ he said…
“Honestly, Jim. What do you think of this old man your sister is involved with?”
“He is a great man. I truly love him,” I said honestly.
“He is old enough to be her father!”
“Nowhere near it, dad. Cut it out.”
“Alright, alright. So…”
“What is on your agenda today?”
Fuck. I’d nearly forgotten.
When Rena and I make love, she insists on looking me in the eye the entire time, which I absolutely enjoy.
It is rather difficult to catch her eye when we are out and about , though. Strange.