Einstein's Hammock: There Is No Such Thing As Cold

One man's philosophy is another man's bellylaugh.

Jeff L. Howe

Location: Lyndon, Pennsylvania,
Birthday: April 19

Company: Visit the website: jeff-howe.net

Bio: Jeff Howe is a bonsai enthusiast and harmonica player who has very good reason to believe that the Universe tastes like a cheap buck-fifty melon. He is a product of Walled Lake and a former Poetry Slam Champion of Milwaukee. He once shook hands with Rocky Colavito, opened for Leon Redbone and took a piss next to Mose Allison (no hands were shaken). All things considered, his best single day was July 4th, 1987 when he marched in the Marmarth, North Dakota parade in the morning, discovered a rare dinosaur skull in the afternoon, and then sat in playing harmonica with a drunken cowboy band until way past tomorrow. It's been downhill ever since. Jeff is a misemployed geologist who specializes in interpreting rock outcrops at 70 miles per hour. It's a gift. His daughter loves cows. ................................................................................................................... FOR MORE STORIES, PHOTOS AND HARMONICA RECORDINGS VISIT: jeff-howe.net

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Jeff L. Howe's Links

Best Of...: The Anatomy Of The Tune; Get Out'a Dodge; The Perfect Ice; Dusty Amish Diamonds; Why Artists Art; Emotional Morphine; A Single Steel Paper Clip; I Witnessed A Murder; A Mountain Cabin...; A Young Man's Encounter...; When The Baby Exploded; The Next Moment...; Church of the Holy Moly; The Universe Tastes Like...; Idiot, But Well-Meaning, Dog; When The Last Girl Leaves...; Incident At A Drive-In; Where Do Mountains...; Sweet Old Burt: SOB; A Guy With A Pen
Stories: Old Baxter: A Dog Story; When Mom Ran Over The Cat; Let Me Be Rich; Grandma To The E.R...; Dead Lady Rockin'; Pie-Wielding Polocks...
Essays: My First Blogoversary; Flaw In The Apocalypse; Milford, Michigan; Sleepless At 4:49am; What Should A Blog Be?; 101 Word Paragraph; Hot Chocolate; Old And In The Way...; Hitting A Tennis Ball; Canada: The Air Is Moving; On SPAM; Two Items (for GNS); On Ice Cream; Amish Of Lancaster County; Why Live In Oakland?; Reunion: Going Back...; The President Has Been Shot; Snow Along The Conestoga; Best There Ever Was; Clueless Wanna-Be Hippie; The Wind Isn't Blowing...
Humor/Irony: Squirrel Chicken For Keeps; Mr. Batsakis; Dead SOBs Part II; A Thanksgiving Incident; ...Like A Buck-Fifty Melon; The Physics of Little Old Men; San Francisco Street Corner
Review/Opinion/Commentary: The Tiara!; Buddy Guy - Old Blues Guy?; Harmonica Players
Science: Gravity. It's The Law.; The Invention Of Sex; The Physics Of Little Old Men; Einstein's Hammock #1; The Tick-Tock Continuum
Geology: The Haiti Earthquake; Where Do Mountains...?; The Desert From The Air
Teaching: About Global Warming; Lazy, Disinterested Students
History: Bridging Four Centuries...; Refighting the Civil War...; Searching For The Old Road; The First Vermonters
Horticulture: The Bonsai Paradox; Dawn Redwoods As Bonsai (II); Dawn Redwoods As Bonsai (I)
Workin' For A Livin': School Of Last Resort; Don't Touch Me!; If Pirates Picked Grapes; Punching Out
Other Sites by Jeff Howe: Little Big Trees - Bonsai; Whistle Up A Rope - Stories; Howe Original Productions

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JANUARY 8, 2012 11:17AM

Rate: 5 Flag

“Jeez, it’s cold outside!”

This time of year that’s a comment that you hear often, especially when the north wind rolls out of Canada and works its way beneath your coat, to your shoulders and the small of your lower back.

But it’s NOT cold outside… not in the least bit.

... to finish this post, click here for jeff-howe.net...

(Sorry, I promise not to do this all the time... but I'm trying to build up awareness of my new web site.)

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Comments

Post a comment

I can understand if you think that this sort of cheesey bait-and-switch is bogus. Sorry. I promise not to do it all the time. I'll have a new (full) post on Tuesday.

Jeff L. Howe

January 08, 2012 11:20 AM

Oh howe you play with us, Mr. Howe! I will go there...but only because of Einstein.

(Just kidding. You know I love your writing!)

mhold

January 08, 2012 11:46 AM

Good looking website. An inspiration. But I'm not ready to leave my cozy home at OS for that cold orbit out there. But, just in case this is a good year, howdjadooit?
R

ASH ...

January 08, 2012 12:03 PM

See! Here my little site was chugging along quietly on its own, I post this, and suddenly everything spikes. (My new site actually gives me data. I guess I'll be walking with a foot in each track for a while.

Jeff L. Howe

January 08, 2012 12:37 PM

I would dearly love to read the rest of your blog but I NEVER allow anyone to bait-n-switch me...... not ever.
.

skypixie0

January 08, 2012 12:57 PM

skypixeo: you are obviously a feline of great principle.

Jeff L. Howe

January 08, 2012 01:38 PM

...but you'll never find out why there's no such thing as "cold"...

Jeff L. Howe

January 08, 2012 01:42 PM

I loved the piece and your website. Especially the harmonica.
Beautiful!
rated with love

RomanticPoetess

January 08, 2012 02:47 PM

Jeff,
I've read enough of Einstein's work so that I already know why he thought that there is no such thing as "cold". As to cold air going down to the US from Canada, a short course in meteorology might help you some. Yeah, I know, it'll contradict what Americans have "known" for years...... ;-)
.
.

skypixie0

January 09, 2012 12:30 AM

Thanks, fella -

Never "metcha" before; deLIGHTED to find you here right now because of many kinds of "cold" on OS right now. [Here, there, or wherever ... :-(]

But no matter our geographical separations -- anyone see the full moon tonight?

"See ya' Tuesday" ;-)

podunkmarte

January 09, 2012 12:52 AM

P.S. Sorry to be such a dork (but, hey, I'm a dork, so what's to be done about it??) but I tried going to your other post, and couldn't find it. :-( Will it be incorporated here next Tuesday)

faceless, avaterless ;-)

podunkmarte

January 09, 2012 12:57 AM