Here is a welcome addition to the "Shit people say" meme. This one is in support of Stop Street Harassment.
Any men out there catcallers or serial "complimenters"? There is an appropriate way to tell a woman you think she is beautiful, but you'd better know her pretty well first, okay? Your animal impulses are not welcome.
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Cary Tennis
Kathryn O'Hehir
Benin L.
Sandor lsg Marai
Diane Barth
Mimetalker
Salon.com
Comments
Jmac, it does matter whether you look threatening/leering, which you probably did not. Nonetheless, regardless of whether they laughed, it's not polite to draw attention to a stranger's looks in public, whether those looks are good, bad, or odd. You shone a spotlight on them and basically suggested to everyone within earshot that they should check out the sights.
I think among y0unger men (boys?) there is a bit of an epidemic of sexual rudeness in many urban environments. Maybe too many grew up without strong father figures, or perhaps they are too emboldened by the misogynistic patriarchal egocentism that is so endemic to hip-hop videos? But then the wolf whistle and the cat call are nothing new. I don't know, but I think the younger more aggressive men are perhaps more threatening than us aging old fools are. But then the aging fools can still make fools of themselves, and be creepy, but just perhaps less scary because we no longer have enough raging virility to be dangerous. We're more to be pitied perhaps? :) lol
But I certainly had my share of harassment until my 40s, and I hated it. You can tell the difference. Flirtation asks; harassment intrudes. If you are a guy and this is not intuitive, don't try it until you figure it out. But if you can make eye contact and smile, or nod, or say something friendly--with a sense of the situation, a social judgment that some people have and others can't seem to learn--then go for it. If the woman ignores you or glares, run your behavior past a woman friend and see if that was really out of line.
I think I love the guys in this video for speaking out against real harassment that causes fear and embarrassment to the girl or woman!
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Before I could speak she said "Hey creepy, how ya doin?"
I left.
The reason you think younger guys are creepier about it is because you aren't one of them any more. It's been true for a long time. In the old days, particularly for girls walking past construction sites...
I think the older guys are creepier (if they don't know how to behave). The young one's are just boneheaded and vulgar, but even then they are not creepy like us older guys because they are blessed with youth.