I have my fork and I know how to use it!

Jim White

Jim White
November 02
I use my fork to pick horse stalls on a regular basis. We all need to take a fork to the state of political affairs and reduce the accumulation of manure. I'll also be picking on the right wing authoritarians and picking at issues that have been ignored for far too long. Most importantly, our country is in the process of picking its next set of leaders.


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AUGUST 29, 2008 2:12PM

"He said, (sniff) he would pick meeee!"

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Okay, this afternoon I was taking a nap and I thought I heard a strange noise from my cell phone. I picked it up and clicked on the line, only to hear a conversation get started.


Here is what I remember:

“Harry (sniff), it’s Joe.”

“Joe, I told you to quit calling me. We kicked you out.”

“But Harry, I can’t quit crying. He said (sniff) he would pick meeee!”

“I’m sorry, Joe. We told you he was bad news.”

“Please let me back in, Harry. I’ll be good (sniff). I promise.”

“Joe, I told you the only way I can stay in charge is by kicking you out. Nothing personal.”

“Harry, I’ll do any(sniff)thing.”

“Joe, I really don’t think there’s anything you can do now to help yourself. And try to stop crying.”

“Harry, I have an idea. When I get up to give my speech Monday, I’ll tear up the written copy and say that I endorse Barack. Would that get me back in?”

“Wow, Joe, if you do that, I might just be able to help you.”

“Thanks, (sniff) Harry.”


“Yeah, Harry?”

“Will you check my bearings?”

That’s when I hung up.

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