Ted Zeppelin

Ted Zeppelin
Location
New Jersey, USA
Birthday
May 09
Title
Counterpropagandist
Bio
Just look at us. Everything is backwards, everything is upside down. Doctors destroy health, lawyers destroy justice, psychiatrists destroy minds, scientists destroy truth, major media destroys information, religions destroy spirituality and governments destroy freedom.” ― Michael Ellner ----------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- "We are grateful to the Washington Post, the New York Times, Time Magazine, and other great publications whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises of discretion for almost forty years. It would have been impossible for us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subject to the bright lights of publicity during these years. But the world is now more sophisticated and prepared to march towards a world government... The supranational sovereignty of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the national auto-determination practiced in past centuries." - David Rockefeller, Speaking in June, 1991 meeting in Baden, Germany"---------------------------- -"The scientific community would come down on me in no uncertain terms if I said the world had cooled from 1998. OK it has but it is only 7 years of data and it isn't statistically significant." - UN Scientist Phil Jones to scientist John Christy July 5th 2005--------------------------------------

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AUGUST 23, 2010 2:50PM

Ideas For The 21st Century Wedding

Rate: 5 Flag

Two words - Cubic Zirconium.

Three words - Two months salary?

One question - Are you fucking kidding?

Another question - Where's my freaking dowery?

And you wonder why guys don't want to get married. How about the bride has to spend 2 months of her salary on golf clubs? How's that for a sensible purchase? Oh wait, you can actually do something with golf clubs. And I don't golf. I'm just trying to make a point.

Between the ring, the dresses, the cake, the band, the hall, the flowers, the engraved invitations, the preacher, the fucking ice sculptures, a father,  groom, and couple are out a downpayment on a new car and starter home.

Funeral and hospital stays are the only comparable wealth vampires.

And that's the start. Who wants to be around a crazy person for 6 months of planning and fretting and worrying over this perfect fucking day?

Screw that. A ten minute ceremony. A back yard party with plenty of food, alcohol and an MP3 player hooked to speakers. Pocket the 80 grand instead of making everyone else rich while dad and the couple are in hock up to their eyeballs.

American weddings have become self indulgent estrogen orgies of excess, waste, frivolity, competitive one-upsmanship, and downright bad financial planning.

A Diamond is forever!

So is death. I don't see anyone lining up for that.

Fuck you, Debeers. Two months salary, my wrinkled sack.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Get this:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20060815172144AAvao4t

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_much_money_should_you_spend_on_an_engagement_ring

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080813222729AAf4fQb 

I've been around 46 years. Didn't hear two months salary until about 10 or 15 years ago, from Debeers propaganda. The Cecil Rhodes based company that corned the market on diamonds long ago. Recently I heard three months salary used in a movie. And they are actually getting people to rewrite history saying it was always three months. Jesus Christ, what an Orwellian world.

The people selling it arbitrarily put out two months salary as propaganda an now are saying 3?

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I actually knew a couple who did exactly what you suggest, including asking for the eighty grand (or whatever) her parents were planning on spending on the wedding as a down payment on their life together. They got it. I went to the ceremony, spoke with the bride's parents and they were relieved about their daughter's and son-in-law's choice and request. There was a ring involved, though. It was from one of those prize machines in grocery stores.
gailrae
August 23, 2010 03:04 PM
Was it me who got you in such an uproar? I totally understand and agree. EXCEPT: You can do something with diamonds - they cut glass, thus allowing that special someone in your life the possibility of becoming a jewel thief. No more expensive birthdays after that!
Alysa Salzberg
August 23, 2010 03:07 PM
Well Im not suggesting they ask the parents for 80 grand. But they will probably offer a nice gift anyway if they save a bundle on these demented estrogen orgies.

And yes, Alysa, it is often other blogs that send me into a rant. The last one was on fashion and poverty that triggered a rant.
Ted Zeppelin
August 23, 2010 03:12 PM
Here Thorville, I wrote this for you: http://open.salon.com/blog/alysa_salzberg/2010/08/23/why_thorville_should_move_to_france

I hope you'll see that somewhere, there is hope and sanity in our world.
Alysa Salzberg
August 23, 2010 03:22 PM
Or if the link doesn't work (I've been having trouble with that), just go to my blog - it's the latest post.
Alysa Salzberg
August 23, 2010 03:23 PM
Don't look at me on this one! I can't even get married legally. xox
Robin Sneed
August 23, 2010 03:33 PM
Yup. Lesbians are ruining it for everyone.
Ted Zeppelin
August 23, 2010 03:37 PM
In fact, I'm pretty sure Rosie O'Donnell is the reason wedding costs are skyrocketing. I mean, a cruise? Give me a break.
Ted Zeppelin
August 23, 2010 03:53 PM
Good for you. Fight the power.
Ted Zeppelin
August 23, 2010 04:05 PM
Very well-put. My husband and I got married young - at age 20 - and ran off to the good old JP in the state of Florida (we live in Mississippi). I wore a sundress and he wore jeans. Our closest friends were there. We walked on the beach. It set us back about 200.00, and I wouldn't change a damn thing. We've been married for seven years now.
Thing I've noticed is, the more expensive and lavish the wedding, the nastier the divorce.
And as far as the ring goes... two months' salary? Yeah f'ing right! I picked out my ring myself and it is a GORGEOUS half carat white gold number and cost less than a grand. Nineteen year olds don't have a lot of money to blow on such things. I adore my ring. I'd much rather use all that money on a down payment for a house or, you know, something more tangible, than a "perfect" wedding in which something stupid will probably happen and ruin it anyway.
hayseedpunkash
August 23, 2010 05:13 PM
Yup. I grew up in the suburbs but have attended enough musician friends to see low budget weddings and they were at least as fun. Less pressure. It should be a funand joyous event, not a contest to see who's father is the richest.
Ted Zeppelin
August 23, 2010 05:16 PM