We are gathered here to pay our respects to Benjamin Hawthorn. A man we all knew and loved in one way or another.
What can you say about Ben? He liked to have a good time and loved children, as many of his friends here from Narcotics Anonymous and NAMBLA can attest.
Like anyone else, Ben had his problems, like the time he was incarcerated for illegal possesion of codeine and touching a Labradoodle in an inappropriate way.
And like the rest of us, Ben was not perfect. Not blessed with much intelligence or even a reasonable amount of ethical standards, his choices in life were limited to hosting game shows or politics, and we all know how that turned out, though he did take a close second in the California Gubernatorial race, before the unfortunate shoplifting incident.
But despite all that Benjamin was well liked, as the turnout today demonstrates, from friends, family and people he owed money to. I would repeat the last thing he said to me before his car accident, but most of the words were slurred, and the ones I could make out would probably not be suitable for a mixed audience.
But it is not our place to judge, regardless of his actions the fateful night his stolen vehicle hit that schoolbus of nuns. We leave that to a higher authority than the New Jersey Court system or even the Vatican itself, who have had their own run-ins with the sex offenders registry.
If we could learn anything from Ben, I am not sure what that would be, though I suspect it might have something to do with cooking crystal meth. But I digress. For those who knew him, at least those who were not taken in by his real estate ventures and no money down adult book franchises, we say farewell. May God have mercy on your immortal soul. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.....
What can you say about Ben? He liked to have a good time and loved children, as many of his friends here from Narcotics Anonymous and NAMBLA can attest.
Like anyone else, Ben had his problems, like the time he was incarcerated for illegal possesion of codeine and touching a Labradoodle in an inappropriate way.
And like the rest of us, Ben was not perfect. Not blessed with much intelligence or even a reasonable amount of ethical standards, his choices in life were limited to hosting game shows or politics, and we all know how that turned out, though he did take a close second in the California Gubernatorial race, before the unfortunate shoplifting incident.
But despite all that Benjamin was well liked, as the turnout today demonstrates, from friends, family and people he owed money to. I would repeat the last thing he said to me before his car accident, but most of the words were slurred, and the ones I could make out would probably not be suitable for a mixed audience.
But it is not our place to judge, regardless of his actions the fateful night his stolen vehicle hit that schoolbus of nuns. We leave that to a higher authority than the New Jersey Court system or even the Vatican itself, who have had their own run-ins with the sex offenders registry.
If we could learn anything from Ben, I am not sure what that would be, though I suspect it might have something to do with cooking crystal meth. But I digress. For those who knew him, at least those who were not taken in by his real estate ventures and no money down adult book franchises, we say farewell. May God have mercy on your immortal soul. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.....
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Comments
I mean, who hasn't done this?
Oh....really?
Illegal huh? Damn....that should be written down somewhere!!!
**Wanders off**
:P