I posted a satirical piece yesterday, “The New Mrs. Tom Cruise Targeted” and within a few minutes remembered that I had received this threatening email from the attorney who represents the Church of Scientology.  I deleted the post within a few minutes.  

I received this letter from Ava Paquette a couple of years ago in reference to a domain name I purchased.  Nothing was ever done with the name.  Nothing.  It resided at Godaddy on my list of domain names I own.   Apparently, Ms. Paquette and her team are in a relentless search for domain names that include the word “Scientology.”  Okay, I discarded the domain name when I realized the word is copyrighted.  End of story for me, I thought.  In her letter she accuses me of using “Scientology360.com” to sell various commercial items on a website that didn’t exist.

From: ampaquette@aol.com

To: Joyxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sent: Tuesday, June 01, 2010 12:23 PM

Subject: Unauthorized Use of Registered Trademark

Dear Ms. Xxxxxxxxxxx 

Our office represents the Church of Scientology International ("CSI"), the exclusive licensee of the trademarks and service marks of the Scientology religion, which includes the mark, "SCIENTOLOGY." "SCIENTOLOGY" is registered with the United States Patent and Trademark Office under registration numbers 1,775,441; 1,540,928; 1,342,353; 1,329,474; 1,318,717; 1,306,997; and 898018. It is also registered with trademark offices of over a hundred countries throughout the world.

CSI and its sub-licensees use this mark in connection with providing religious and humanitarian services and counseling, seminars, books, classes, and lectures, among others. This mark is also used extensively on the Internet. For example, many of these products, including a great number of books of the Scientology religion and services are promoted through a number of web sites, including "www.scientology.org," "www.scientologyreligion.org," and "whatisscientology.org," among others.

You are using our client’s trademark without our client’s authorization for commercial purposes and advertisements which includes "Designer Jewelry," "Mortgage Lenders" and "Jewelry Engraving." When a consumer clicks on these advertisements, he or she is taken to websites selling these products which have nothing to do with the Scientology religion or our client. You are accomplishing this through the following website:

"Scientology360.com"

**TWO PARAGRAPHS OF BLAH, BLAH, LEGAL THREATS, FINES, BLAH.......

Accordingly, we ask that you cease and desist of your use of our client’s registered mark and either transfer this domain name to CSI, or cancel it.

I appreciate your prompt attention to this matter.

Sincerely,

Ava Paquette

Moxon & Kobrin

3055 Wilshire Boulevard

Suite 900

Los Angeles, California 90010

Tel: (213) 487-4468

Fax: (213) 487-5385

I didn’t know these threatening letters are referred to as “Avagrams” until I Googled her this morning.  She is also known as “the angry lady.”  This morning, my husband (my in-house attorney) read my post and assured me that it is protected under the First Amendment as satire.

EDIT UPDATE:

I removed the content of the post because a satirical post regarding the subject was posted here a couple of weeks ago.  That is what happens when you don't keep up with current posts of other bloggers.  My bad.  

Maybe I should post about what feeling like a douche is like. 

Ava, that's the real reason I've deleted the post.