From an online article, "Who Knew???"
Allow me to share: "Vodka Remedies"
1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka and it will dissolve the adhesive. (if it stings, take a shot of vodka to kill the pain).
2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let it set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills the mold and mildew. (then sit back, admire your clean bathtub and enjoy a Vodka Tonic).
3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs. (seeing is believing, so take another shot!)
4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting. (I recommend you wash your razor well first before using vodka to do it's magic...waste not want not!)
5. Spray vodka on wine stains. Scrub with a brush and blot dry. (do not mix red wine and vodka, as it is a nasty hangover...pick your poison!)
6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores. (accidentally drizzle some in your mouth first. After sufficient vodka consumption, your face will look as good as hers, too. Just another pretty face!)
7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-oz. bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from the hair and stimulates the growth of healthy hair! (imagine what the vodka can do for the rest of your body (!) in moderation, of course!)
8. Fill a 16 oz. trigger spray bottle with vodka and spray bees or wasps to kill them. (don't feel too guilty, they will die happy! )
9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziploc freezer bag. Freeze for a slushy, refreshing ice pack for aches and pain or black eyes. (wait a sec! Door number 1, of course (!) and also add a jigger of cranberry juice, jigger of sweet and sour and Triple Sec and you've got yourself a "Cosmo-slushy!" Suhweeeet!!!)
10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavendar flowers, fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for 3 days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to aches and pains. (I'm thinkin' the "slushy" above works better! Suit yourself)!
11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment. (heck, if you're going to be delirious with fever, you might as well tie one on as well...followed by lots of sleep and "other fluids!)
12. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka. (ok, even you think this is a waste of good vodka. Can'tcha just take a shower and use soap?! And for Pete's sake, put on some clean socks!)
13. Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting! (therefore, always bring chilled vodka with you to the beach, for a dual purpose! Those jellyfish love the taste of vodka, too!)
14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the "urushiol oil" from your skin. (can't find fault with this one. Might need a Vodka Martini to numb the itch of the pesky skin irritation!)
15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. (now we're talkin'!) Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain. (some of the alcohol?!)
AND SILLY ME!!!
I THOUGHT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DRINK THE VODKA?!?
HAPPY FOODIE FIX-IT TUESDAY!!!


Salon.com
Comments
(I bet it's all Obama's fault, he's obviously as evil as those conservatives warned)
Although I have used it to disinfect food-related items (utensils, cutting boards) since it's edible. No nasty bleach in my kitchen!
GJI Penguin - No Vodka in Saudi?!? Wow, would never have know that fun fact. What's your available poison?
Silkstone - Wow, you're ahead of the curve! Had now idea of any of these uses before today! And there are very low cost vodka's you can get at Cosco, Sam's, etc.
RonPo1 - Yes, there are other common remedies to all 15, other than vodka, for sure. Which ones in particular are you asking about? I'd have to do another post to answer that for all 15!
Roy - Thanks for stopping by my silly Tuesday post.
2. Tuesday after Labor Day= busy
3. Library computers down=hell
4. Can't HAVE any vodka until I get home!=sucks.
Boy, could I use a snort!
RATED and chock full of knowledge. Drop the knowledge girlfriend!
Listerine (#4)
Egg whites (#7)
Soap & water (#12)
Vinegar (#12 )
Aspirin (#9, #10 )
Calamine Lotion (#14)
Hydrogen Pyroxide (#1 & #6)
Hair spray (#8)
Butter (#14)
Beer (#7)
Baking Soda (#14)
Bourbon/Whiskey (#15)
Soda Water (#5)
Raw steak (#9)
Windex (#1 thru 15 if you're Greek! From, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding")
Most of these are true, some are guesses and some are old wives tales. Vodka is easier.
Ya can find a jug of moonshine in the hen coop.
Ya no likes Vodka? I hate strong beverages too.
Ya remember `Grand Ole Opry? Or, a clown say:`
Grand Old UP`Roar. We'd sit in thee hen house.
It was a radio day when the static soothed a hen.
Ay, brown eggs. 'Um were safe to sunny side fry.
MSM radio teevee pundit today is a cackling hen.
The world would be better served if ducks quack.
Well? Ya wonder if the chicken coop has rooster?
The loudmouth gabbers today gibber chicke_hit!
They seem a Cooped Up in a red mule stinky shed!
We people needs to wear googles and headphones!
TV can give Ya swine fleas, lice, parasites, ear aches!
We people would feel better if we listen to real hens!
Just Cathy. I hope You tolerate rants with static hens?
Be at a safe distance from those wham bam radio jocks.
Have loved all your comments and I thank you very much for your time in reading and putting in your valuable 2 cents!
Arthur James - Your delightful poems give me great joy, kind sir. And I am much familiar with "static hens!" Back in the day, we raised Leghorns and Rhode Island Reds. The fresh eggs were the best and my daughters each had a special one as a pet. Did grimace a bit to see them perched on their young shoulders with those sharp talons, but all was well and good. Good neighbors were early risers so we never got reported for our errant chicken noise or keeping such animals where none were zoned in our hood!
Mary, Mary! You're not supposed to drink the Vodka! You're merely supposed to follow the 15 simple remedies, not involving any consumption whatsoever.
"Do as I say, not as I do!!!"
Salute!
(Would it be too controversial to mention using a 1 tip soaked in vodka rubbed on baby gums to relieve teething pain? The kids turned out all right.)