This is my twenty-fifth post on Open Salon.  I’m hoping this is the one which creates the magic numbers “1   2” at the bottom of the page so I can say I am an official blogger with two pages worth of material.  Yes, simple things like this make me feel giddy.  Since I came out of the proverbial closet and decided to share my writing with more than my lonely journal and overcrowded hard drive, it has been an interesting ride. With a tiny bit of experience under my belt now, I thought it would be fun to relate some of my observations since joining Open Salon.

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Vocabulary words I did not know when I started here:  blogosphere, blog whore, Meta posts, upbraiding, feed (in its OS context), trolling (of the non-freaky variety), Reddit, Digg, editor pick, front page (pick) and more.  I felt like I needed an official blog language book upon arrival, I mean I thought I came here to write?

Lesson learned?  Good stuff to know.  It took me over a month to figure this out.  Learn the etiquette; it can be a little like starting a sport like golf.  Thomas has a great post about how to increase your blog audience too.

My advice?  Don’t be afraid to ask people here questions, I asked my friends outside of OS questions and each place has their own nuances.  Do a search on “meta” and you can find some OS User guides.  Comment on blogs, add some favorites, and get to know people.  It helps.  Oh, and I still don't understand Reddit.  I gave up on that one.

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Some zebras do change their stripes.  There are some conservatives here who will argue with you respectfully.  I am not going to give names, but if you are willing to drop the labels and be open-minded, you may find someone who will help you sharpen your views and you both can learn a few things. (A special thanks to my conservative friends).

I will however relate one story with permission.  One person, T.S., who I started off calling the sickest misogynist ever, after being deeply offended by a post, countered back by basically calling me a crazy ass (and rightly so).  Now, we both still come from differing political viewpoints, but we have somehow managed to become friends.  I read a few of his other posts and poems, and he sent me a PM warning me about a potential nut.  I actually treasure this in some odd way; it gives me hope for our country.  Thank you for your friendship T.S.

Lesson Learned?  Be patient, take deep breaths, and argue on substance.  Many of us who like to discuss, ahem, argue politics like to get heated but we can do so without threatening to hunt down your mother.

My advice?  Don’t swing below the belt.  If you start shouting names too loudly, or taking whacks at the ladies, you are going to look like a jerk and not be heard.  It also helps to know all the editor's aliases.  Special note:  you look like a real jerk when you correct writer's English constantly; you know who you are.

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I wasted energy wondering what went into the EP and FP picks.  On my second post at Open Salon, I was touched with a beautiful gift, an EP and FP.  It was a very personal post about my son and it meant so much to me.  I literally jumped up and down the hallway when my husband sent me a text message saying I got an EP/FP, even though I didn’t know what it was, it had to be good, right?  So, when I saw posts popping up questioning the editor’s choices after I immediately did not get another one, I left a few comments wondering what went into the choices. 

Lesson learned?  This is not my job.  I have however run a sales division before and I didn’t find it charming when people who depended on my decisions got self-righteous when they didn’t agree with me.  Typically, it got them exactly the opposite of what they wanted.

My advice?  My money is on not referring to the editors in any type of derogatory fashion, as it just isn’t good karma. Asking questions?  Great.  Being rude?  Pointless. 

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It is best to know what a flame war is before you start or reignite one.  Yes, we all get pissed off from time to time by someone’s attitude, actions, and especially their politics; I apparently am not immune to this (even after all the meditation I do).  If you do a post starting one of these, it might help to also know the hornets nest you are about to stir up.  Also, knowing your opponents reputation, tactics, and how far they are willing to go to fight back; this may cause you deeper pause before you hit that publish button.

Lesson learned?  Don’t go there.  When I did this, the person I posted about said I lied and I had no way to prove I didn’t.  At the end of the day, what I was mad about no longer mattered to me; it didn’t feel too good having my reputation being drawn into question so I am sure it didn’t feel too great for that person either.  I didn’t follow the golden rule and I have to still live with myself once I walk away from the computer.

My advice?  Write it out.  Don’t write about the person, write about the topic.  If the person has pissed you off that much, don’t focus on them, focus on what pissed you off and counter it with an incredible post.  I have seen this done marvelously a few times and often both sides make excellent points and no one has to loose any face. 

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I tried to fool myself with the “I write for myself” line.  If this were completely true, I wouldn’t be posting here for you to read.  No, the writing I do on OS I am hoping other people will read.  I do, however, ultimately have to be happy with what I put out there so I don’t let comments sway me one way or the other. 

Lesson learned?  If I was writing for myself it would still be in my journal or on my hard drive.  Respect how others run their blogs. Even if I think it is the worst crap I’ve ever read and I don’t agree with how they handle themselves, I just don’t click on it.

My advice?  It’s your blog.  Run it any way you want.  Nobody else has to like it.  Some people run theirs as themselves, some run them from a “persona”, and some don’t think about it too much, like me. 

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If it is not fun, why do it?  I get a little, okay a whole bunch, scared when I do a personal post.  In fact, I have almost left twice because I get sick to my stomach after I do a personal post.  It is hard to be vulnerable and then know someone can comment on it.  However, most people realize these posts are delicate and are very respectful.  I mix it up and find myself having a blast, meeting great people, sharing like interests, and writing to my heart’s content.

Lesson learned?  Open Salon is unique and we are truly lucky to have a place to come and share our art, life, writing, photos, politics, news, poetry and the like with each other.

My advice?  Dive in, the water’s warm, if you make a mistake be humble, and write some stuff which will blow us away!

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Thank you all for your amazing welcome and the time you have taken to come by my blog to comment and share.  I really appreciate it.  This has been one of the best things I have done for myself.  I consider Open Salon a community ~ I appreciate you including me in your art and lives.