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Kate Mohler

Kate Mohler
Location
Chandler, Arizona, USA
Birthday
May 03
Title
English Instructor
Company
Mesa Community College
Bio
I'm from Minnesota, but have lived in Wisconsin, UP Michigan, Pennsylvania, Washington State, and Alaska. Now Arizona is home. I have a B.A. in English from Bemidji State University in Minnesota (um...go Beavers!) and an M.F.A. in creative writing (Arizona State, '94). I teach English at Mesa Community College in Arizona. Besides teaching, I write, read, bond with my cats Sara and Lucy and Leo, listen to music, tackle home projects, and travel when I can. Love a good roadtrip, but always looking for a reason to fly away. I am about to purchase my first camping equipment.

MY RECENT POSTS

Kate Mohler's Links

Salon.com
OCTOBER 25, 2011 2:13PM

Horsewoman

My refrigerator broke last week, about the same time my heart did. It lost its cool slowly, kind of like me: water puddled on the kitchen floor, frozen pizzas drooped, soda cans started sweating. I was aware that something was amiss on Sunday night, but decided… Read full post »

OCTOBER 25, 2011 2:11PM

A Logical Fallacy

Every semester at this time, my class moves away from personal writing to persuasive writing. It pains me to even write that, for what is persuasive writing or speech without a personal touch? What is persuasive speech without risk and trouble.

There’s a class period every… Read full post »

OCTOBER 25, 2011 2:10PM

Pig-Swine

You can’t think of anything funny, so—to save yourself from a negative day—you go inside yourself to dig up what might have been funny in the past.

You can only think of yourself as the butt of jokes, the one who made everyone else laugh.

When you were five,… Read full post »

OCTOBER 25, 2011 2:09PM

Birdmonster II

Woody Allen crept up on me the other night in the bathroom again, just like he did last year. What a nuisance--still trying to get me to spread my wings. “The heart wants what it wants,” he breathed down my neck.

Yeah, I know, I thought.

My spines tingled. My… Read full post »

OCTOBER 25, 2011 2:07PM

Gun Shy

Maybe writing about guns on campus is not an appropriate topic for a lovely Sunday morning. Guns on campus: hold on, everybody’s at church today. Everybody’s going out for breakfast in their best duds. Why bring guns up and ruin everything?

Because once a gun… Read full post »

OCTOBER 8, 2011 1:51PM

Love Bites


My neighborhood has been overrun with stray cats. There is Ballsy, the dangly-balled black male who flops on top of my cinder block walls with his privates hanging halfway down to the hedge. He drags his junk through the gravel in my yard at night;

Read full post »

OCTOBER 8, 2011 1:50PM

Pretty Girl

When a single girl has been under the weather for as long as I’ve been—first with an upper respiratory infection and then Allergic Conjunctivitis (basically just the tiniest of flying monkeys poking your eyeball with a thousand splendid needles)—she runs out of food.

That&rsquo… Read full post »

OCTOBER 8, 2011 1:46PM

T-shirt Under My Pillow

Many years ago in a galaxy far away, I was married. There were liars, flat tires, and bores, oh my. If I built it, he would never come help. We were never in Kansas because we couldn’t afford to go there, and I was saying… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 24, 2011 3:29PM

Not Yet A Mermaid


In the grocery store the other day—not having shopped for food in two weeks due to a bout of cholera—I was happy to once again be hunting and gathering. Freshly baked bread! Bananas and pears! Spinach and tomatoes.…

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SEPTEMBER 8, 2011 2:04PM

Meat Treat

I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t had much chance to play with my cats, Sara and Lucy. Playtime is usually around 9:30 in the morning, after I’ve had my oatmeal and they’ve licked the bowl. The bowl-licking is supposed to immediately lead into… Read full post »

AUGUST 27, 2011 5:28PM

Free At Last

Let’s play a game. Imagine that you meet a lying thief, an impostor kind of person who lures you into a romance by taking you out for expensive nights on the town, building a brand-new house in a luxury development, and insisting that you both enjoy only… Read full post »

AUGUST 25, 2011 1:54PM

Banjo Face

My niece Shanna (rhymes with “Ghana”) and I went to see Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers play bluegrass last weekend up in Flagstaff. You might be thinking, Steve Martin plays in a band? Isn’t he the guy with the arrow through his head?… Read full post »

AUGUST 25, 2011 1:37PM

Off-Again


Off-again arrives to pick me up for my epidural shot.

“I’m almost ready,” I say.

“Do you mind if I check my e-mail then?” he says.

“No, sure. Let me unlock the computer for you.”

This statement sails through…

Read full post »

AUGUST 12, 2011 3:54PM

Lave

Many years ago, when my brother lived with his first partner and they were both divorced dads, they would get their children—two little boys—on the weekends and holidays, a typical joint custody situation. They would do things that most families do: go to the movies, go to… Read full post »

AUGUST 12, 2011 3:54PM

Lave

Many years ago, when my brother lived with his first partner and they were both divorced dads, they would get their children—two little boys—on the weekends and holidays, a typical joint custody situation. They would do things that most families do: go to the movies, go to… Read full post »

AUGUST 8, 2011 12:34PM

Bring It On

Today was my second day of Pilates, and it was more humiliating than the first. At least during the first session I had the good sense to hide in the middle of the group, plus we used small basketball-size balls to squeeze between our legs and roll… Read full post »

AUGUST 5, 2011 4:41PM

Beaverette

I walked into the gym yesterday afternoon to do my usual routine: hop on the step-climber, ride the bike, cross-train myself into a frenzy, go home frothing at the mouth. But this plan changed when I ran straight into our massage therapist Tyrone, who happens to be… Read full post »

AUGUST 1, 2011 1:55PM

The Age of Reason

I was at the mall yesterday looking for a new shirt, and happened to walk by a hair salon. I’ve been meaning to buy a diffuser for my hair dryer for about twenty years, and yesterday was the day. Not that I often blow dry my… Read full post »

JULY 28, 2011 2:24PM

Sue Me

I have taken to working out in the early afternoons, going to the gym a couple hours after lunch, after the lentil soup has settled. But who am I kidding: I still shake my head and raise my hands to the heavens when I get gassy on… Read full post »

JULY 25, 2011 8:06PM

Hello Balls

I had this ingenious idea the other day to carry my MP3 player in my panties while I cleaned the house. I didn’t have any other place else to stick it—no pockets, no nothin’. This has led me to better understand and appreciate the male’s problem—and… Read full post »

JULY 25, 2011 8:06PM

Hello Balls

I had this ingenious idea the other day to carry my MP3 player in my panties while I cleaned the house. I didn’t have any other place else to stick it—no pockets, no nothin’. This has led me to better understand and appreciate the male’s problem—and… Read full post »

JULY 23, 2011 7:19PM

Porn Free

The morning routine around my house is the same every day: wake up, beg God for guidance, scoop out the litter box and walk out back to feed the birds. A friend remarked the other day that I sure have a lot of pigeons at my birdfeeder.… Read full post »

JULY 20, 2011 3:09PM

Baby Got Blood

My niece drove up from Tucson to spend her birthday weekend with me. Her name is Shanna and before I proceed, it’s imperative that we all pronounce her name correctly: it rhymes with Ghana, a pronunciation point she’s been making since she was ten: “It doesn’t… Read full post »

JULY 16, 2011 11:16AM

Gone With My Wind


In my fourth week of physical therapy, I’m happy to report that the tiny flying monkeys swinging from my sciatic nerve and gerrymandering my pelvic region have been corralled and mostly expelled. At least I think they’re gone; for…

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JULY 10, 2011 3:43PM

Landlocked

When you work out with a partner, you can go harder, faster, longer. Maybe it’s the fact that somebody is urging you on, or you have somebody to impress, or maybe it’s just that talking while you’re running or lifting weights distracts you from the fact that… Read full post »