And so we are in love
and love alone
describes the pattern of our days;
love consumes us hour by hour,
and we expect friends to understand
we still have things to do we
should have done before.
By whose calendar should
we measure love,
and by whose clock should we mark time?
Grace knows no schedule,
keeps no notes, cannot be clicked
on and off like a stopwatch
or tucked into a planner
with bills and grocery slips; and so
let us not cross off these days
in red ink.
Let us press them
like leaves between the pages
of the story of our lives
so we remember what we are doing here,
and what we have done,
and that we are together by grace
and grace alone.
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Ann Nichols
Mumbletypeg
Reflections of a shallow pond
Linda Seccaspina
Gianni Falcone
trilogy
Salon.com
Comments
in red ink.
Let us press them
like leaves between the page
Yes. Yes . . .
I love this poem!
i love seeing poetry here. and its nice to see the endurance of good things.
fuck it! throw that calendar away. be that couple that makes everyone else sick... forever!
"Let us" is a word pair that should often be avoided because of its soundex similarity to "lettuce" which is what the ear hears when read aloud.
"Let's" would work much better here.
I would also change "of the story of our lives" to "in the story of our lives" to avoid the two ofves problem.
Now this is purely subjective, but I would have ended this with "until grace alone survives." but that's a mind reading on my part.
About your fund raising thing: I refuse to believe that Open Salon can't get you into the top 100. We have a whole new month now, and I would like to see a concerted push on this from everyone. Are you up again for the contest?
"Let us press them
like leaves between the pages
of the story of our lives"
Loved this.
and echoes of filtered light, I see this two, ignoring paper and squares
@sage: Thanks for the advice. I'm thinking about it. I'm not sure I like "survives" at the end, because I think "Grace Period" and "grace alone" complete the circle. I think the poem has some other problems, as well. Never done, I suppose.
Lovely post. I'm a fan of sentiment over technical pedantries. You write from the heart and the heart can not be quantified in mechanical terms. Your art is your art and you deliver it as suits you.
Thank you for sharing.
Rated with thanks,
JL