One evening an old Cherokee said, 'My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all. One is anger, envy, lust, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.The other is joy, peace, gratitude, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. ' The grandson thought, then asked: 'Which wolf wins?'The old Cherokee replied, 'The one you feed.'  I sent the above to a friend who was a police officer for several years. I then asked if he could remember an instance where he worked at "feeding" the better wolf. He replied:  There were many, many times back then when it would have been easy to let the first wolf win.   That I was able to ensure the second wolf won was not always easy, and I think that's part of the reason why I "escaped" that work virtually unscathed.  It also was probably one of the reasons I was picked to be a hostage negotiator.   It's much easier to talk your way out of a fight than to do all the reports and pick up the pieces later.  Plus, it doesn't hurt as much. A time that comes to mind we (several of us "guys in blue") were sent out to take a man into custody and take him to jail on a warrant.  When we knocked on the door we were met by the bad guy who happened to be about 6'2", 225 pounds, and ZERO body fat.  He was told of the warrant and that we were there to take him with us.  He flat out told us that there was no way he was going to jail and that we'd better call for reinforcements if we wanted to take him.   It was summer time and the neighbors started to gather in their yards to see what all the cops and cop cars were doing in their neighborhood.   He and I were standing on his front porch at that time, he had his back to the wall, and he braced for a fight.  As we talked the other cops, expecting a good fight, came up onto the porch.  I explained to him that not going to jail was not an option.  Recognizing that he was not drunk or stoned I tried to appeal to his sense of reason.  I told him that he had the choice of fighting us and that likely he would get hurt in the process.  Then he would be cuffed and hog tied and put in the back of the cop car .   Or he could stand tall like a man and go to jail with his dignity intact.  I explained that it was his choice, but if I were in his shoes I would choose to retain my dignity and not be dragged off like a beaten dog with all his neighbors watching.   He decided that would probably be the wiser choice and he turned around to be cuffed.  I walked around in front of him, extended my hand to shake his and looked him in the eyes and just said "Thanks.  You made a wise choice."  He shook my hand and allowed himself to be cuffed. Even though he was irritated at being caught he recognized that we were treating him with respect and he was able to keep his dignity. 

(Diplomacy is the art of letting the other fellow have your way.)