-- Aside from Healthcare, here's what else I would like to see the government swoop in and control. --

10) CBS's Primetime Line-Up: Can Obama do something about how much cliche'd crime crap is being pushed onto the elderly? Can anyone explain the difference between any of the CSI's and Criminal Minds? Do they really need TWO NCIS's? There oughta be a law.

9)  James Patterson: The man "writes" about eighteen books a year.  He is, most likely, doing more to dumb down America than No Child Left Behind. I realize people need their tacky suspense novels, but can they at least regulate how many of them come out per year so that perhaps people have to pick up things like...oh, I don't know...Dickens, Steinbeck, Updike? There oughta be a law.

8) The New Melrose Place:  Forget desecrating the Constitution.  Over at the CW, they're desecrating Aaron Spelling's legacy.  Commies, where are you when we need you? There oughta be a law.

7) Taylor Swift: Can someone in the White House arrange to get this girl a boyfriend so that I don't have to listen to her ridiculous musings anymore? Can't Congress just pass a law wherein whatever Jonas it was that broke up with her has to get back with her until she turns thirty wherein he can dump her again, and being heartbroken won't be cute anymore? There oughta be a law.

6) Any More Transformers Sequels: I'll settle for having Megan Fox permanently muzzled, but since that might be against some sort of humanity something-or-other law, how about we just agree that two was more than enough? You can only banish Super-Evil-Tron so many times. There oughta be a law.

5) Cookie Dough: That whole ecoli thing screwed up my cookie intake for weeks. Let's make sure that doesn't happen again. There oughta be a law.

4) American Idol: How about instead of up-and-coming singers we have people trying out to be America's Next Top Pundit. Every week people can talk about news stories and whichever one manages to make several key points without falling back on snarkiness or exaggeration gets their own show--Rachel Maddow can judge. There oughta be a law.

3) Tyler Perry: His last movie was titled "I Can Do Bad All By Myself." I think he's trying to tell us something, people. There oughta be a law.

2) How Much Time Ryan Seacrest is Exposed to the General Public: Can we get it below eighty hours a week? Please? I know it has to be possible now that we're revamping Idol (See #4) There oughta be a law.

1) Marriage--Oh wait, the government already DOES control it.

Wonder why you don't see more angry people protesting that?