I wish I could write dialog as good as this. I'd be a best seller. With only minor editing, this is a conversation I accidentally stumbled into. More like, "stepped into" - you know, the way one "steps into" a fresh cow patty???? Anyway -
First the backstory: Bobby Joe, Wynona’s son, moved back home with his parents two years ago. Oh. And he brought along his girlfriend Brandi and her two little girls. This is a little family discussion they had on Facebook recently....
Actors :
Wynona is Bobby Joe’s momma
Brandi is Bobby Joe’s girlfriend
Bobby Joe is Wynona’s son and Brandi’s boyfriend, and a real jerk….
Get your popcorn ready - this is fun!
And now - Lights, Cameras, ACTION!!!
First post, by Wynona: you no it's pretty sad when you do everything you can to help some people and they still complain! when me and Les got married we moved out on our own,i pretty sure that's how it is supposed to work!!!!!!!!! and i was only 14,not 21 thank you!!!!!!
- Brandi: if your talking about me dont worry as soon as i get a chance i am gone the only reason i am here is bc i cant take my kids with me thank you very much.................
- Wynona: yeah it's like u spend so much time with them anyways!!!!! lmfao
Second post by Brandi
i am so mad right knw and they know why and they are complaing bc we use the car but if they kept their deal we wouldnt be in this sistuation i gusse january i am gonna get a new car....hope i get my job back so i can move out..............
- Wynona: little girl don't forget i am on here too!!! have you ever heard don't bite the hand that feeds you!!!!! you really don't want to go there! you need to learn some self control!! now with that being said, i still love you,you little shithead!!!
- Brandi: dont even get started with me wynona!
- Brandi: what do u mean u feed me all i do is live with u
- Bobby Joe well yall bitchs need to chill out nd quit puttin all this bullshit on here!!!nd as far as the bitein that hand. ill break the fukin hand cuz eryone knows bout me i dnt give a fuk either way! so stop the bulshit NOW!!!cuz u bitchs foget im da boss!
- Wynona: oh little girl who has bought u shampoo,cigs,pads,washed,dried folded and hung ur clothes for 2 years,who do u think pays the water bill electric,satillite,phone,laundry det. washes ur dishes,cooks 4 ur a$s raising ur girls now u want to keep running ur pie hole,i can get real mean if i want 2!!!!
- Wynona: Bobby Joe u can kiss my big fat a$s 2,brandi started put this shit on here i told her to stop, but she just keeps on keepin on
- Bobby Joe: moms u need to fukin chillout! yall r tellin our whole life story on this stupiid ass fb!fukin stop now! cuz i am gettin fukin crzy mad! u both r stupid for writtin dis shit nd im tired of it
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gail williams
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Comments
ER - Yeah, not like US'uns, huh!!!!!!
Lezlie
rated with hugs y'all
Linda - Oh, I despise FB - I wouldn't have found this except a little birdie told me....
Ll2 - I know! Man, I'd hate to think of my family squabbles being aired like this. Oh. Wait. That's right - I don't HAVE family squabbles~!
Flower Child - Don't kid yourself - The north knows a thing or two about dustups, too! But the colorful language??? No, for that you got to go DEEP into the South!
zanelle - I know - I was amazed! All I did was change the names and a few small identifying details - the essential dialog is intact...
CC - Yes, Xmas spirit indeed. Ho. Another Ho. And a HA!!!
Brandi and Bobby Joe, please don't have children!
rated with love
The whole thing is a better read than, "Our octegenarian octet group sang in the mall today." or, "This morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator 'cos mine is too loud."
Actually, no. The last one is better than Bobby Joe.
R for hilarious, a great dialogue model for my novel
I HATED it. I seldom heard from my friend personally after that, only got the twitter-like bite-sized bytes. I closed the account. Ella Rose reopened my account because she cheats on her games by using my account to give herself gifts. Yes.
Tink - I don't know - but I have enjoyed FB more today than any day since I first heard about it. Gosh - I might just go active with it again! NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JT - Oh, my! I hadn't even considered THAT! Now, that IS spooky crap! a joint gene pool from these three.... ouch. I won't get a lick of sleep tonight!
Abrawing - Yes. I hadn't considered THAT! At least they probably don't fight over the drumstick - they probably fight over the DUMBstick!!! hahahahahahaha. OK. It wasn't that funny, but it amused me - a little....
Anyway....sigh. Great post and Zumapick for Southern discomfort.
xenon - Yeah, between laughing so hard it was a little nere-wracking!
stellaa - I'm shocked at several levels - one, to see you hear. HI! Two, for you to make assumptions - that doesn't sound like you. No, I don't know these people. This was simply something we found in our travels, and I thought it made a really great parody of dustups. Which it does! And three - For you to be concerned about anyone making fun of anyone is kinda humorous in and of itself - cause I've seen you laugh at others alot! Anyway - human behavior IS laughable alot of times. I try not to laugh at people by name because that's just RUDE - but I think laughing at the funny crap that people do is alot of fun.
What? You don't think that's funny?
Seriously, though - you're just trying to bait me - I ain't biting. I am, however, as I said, HOWLING!
about as authentic as your big game hunting
Ablonde - No, seriously, I didn't make this up. I WISH I could write this good!
Anyway, I do so hate knowing that the above referenced dialog (ie, my BLOG) was, in fact, written by people in Kentucky. It don't bode well on the intellect of our fine Commonwealth. But then - neither do I!
What I find most disturbing in this conversation, this post, these comments, is that I really do speak exactly like I write most times on OS. People have from time to time accused me of being fake and "folksy," but I do really talk like this. I know, I KNOW. TRAGIC! At two levels - one, that I really talk like this and two, that I acknowledge it publicly. Did I say "acknowledge??" Shoot, I wear it like some kind of a medal!