Restore Our Future, the powerful pro-Romney Super PAC, has initiated an aggressive campaign of drone attacks targeting Newt Gingrich. Several hundred Romney drones were seen yesterday morning over Sioux City, Iowa and there is speculation that hundreds more will be deployed soon. &ldqu… Read full post »

Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich has been hospitalized after collapsing this morning outside of a diner in Davenport, Iowa. The former speaker had just left a sparsely attended ‘meet and greet’ at Annie’s Coffee Shop when he was confronted by ABC news reporter Jake Ta… Read full post »

Steve Jobs, the aggressive and demanding personal technology pioneer who died in early October, will be reincarnated as a PC. Afterlife Court spokesman Tom Breen, a former mortgage broker who is living his second life as a slip-n-slide, made the announcement via Twitter.

Mr. Jobs was convicted of &ls… Read full post »

Goldman Sachs Inc., the global investment bank and financial services firm, announced this morning that it is running for president of the United States. The announcement was made at a farm near Waterloo, Iowa by the musician Ted Nugent, who was hired to speak for the candidate. “We love oil an… Read full post »

Just as Mitt Romney's presidential campaign was getting off the ground I was hired by the campaign as a kind of junior speechwriter/copy man. On my first day, they gave me a cubicle, a power shake and a black lawn jockey filled with multi-vitamins. The memo on my desk instructed me… Read full post »

Fox News television host Glenn Beck married himself Sunday evening on the precipice of a small hill overlooking the Mexican border. “I’ve never seen him happier,” said Kenneth Duncan, a longtime friend. “All these years looking for true love and it turns out he was standing… Read full post »

Fox News Television Host Bill O’Reilly was rushed to New York Presbyterian Hospital Friday morning after he was found unconscious and lying on the floor of his office at Fox News Headquarters in Manhattan.

The 59-year-old father of two was found by an O’Reilly Factor segment producer wh… Read full post »

The release of a sex tape featuring former Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert having intercourse with an unidentified woman in a Las Vegas hot tub has failed to achieve its intended aims. “It was a risk,” admitted an advisor close to Mr. Hastert. “But if Kennedy hadn’… Read full post »

The White House is facing continued pressure to release evidence that proves President Obama is not the black reincarnation of Adolf Hitler.

Speculation that the president is Black Hitler began several weeks ago when a grass-roots organization called ‘U.S.A. Kicks Ass’ produced what the… Read full post »

President Obama made history Wednesday afternoon when he signed into law legislation that guarantees healthcare for all Americans. “A struggle that began nearly one hundred years ago ends today,” said the president in a Rose Garden ceremony. “There is no doubt this is one of America… Read full post »

New York Times – February 7, 2029

This obituary is brought to you by Frito-Lay

Dick Cheney, who dominated the world of reality television for over two decades and became one of America’s most beloved celebrities, died on Sunday at his home in Rancho Mirage, CA. He was 88.… Read full post »

In response to the global media attention surrounding the death of Pop Icon Michael Jackson, the actress Sharon Stone has postponed her suicide. "She's pushed it back to the third week of July," said a source close to Stone. "Her team was relatively untroubled by the passing of Ed McMahon,… Read full post »

Hi, I’m new to the group.

I’m a little concerned that my 4 year old is having some trouble focusing and I was wondering if I should get him tested. Dashiell is a bright, sweet and curious little boy, but it took me the better part of three whole… Read full post »

Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson and his family have drawn considerable negative attention recently for making a number of conspicuous purchases, all of which were made after Congress approved its "no strings attached," 700 billion dollar bailout of Wall Street last month.

Mr. Paulson first raised eye… Read full post »

CNN national correspondent John King married Electoral Map, his longtime CNN colleague, in a star-studded ceremony on Martha’s Vineyard Sunday evening. The most anticipated wedding of the year was held at the home of former presidential advisor David Gergen and was attended by a host of politic… Read full post »

President Bush hosted president-elect Obama at the White House Monday morning for what aides characterized as a “productive and gracious meeting.” The conversations between the two men were intended to remain secret, but a high-level source that was privy to the meeting has provided a det… Read full post »

Text Of Charlie Rose's Interview With Joe Biden - September 14, 2008

 Charlie Rose:  Thank you so much for being here, Senator. There is so much I want to cover, but let me start with your sense of Senator Obama. What will he bring to the Oval Office? What kind of president/… Read full post »

The New York Times - September 5, 2008

ST. PAUL - John McCain delivered a memorable and highly unlikely acceptance speech last night that was heralded by Republicans as a monumental achievement, and dismissed by the Obama campaign as a cheap political stunt that degraded the American political proc… Read full post »

Every year on Charlie Rose’s birthday, The Elders of Georgetown – a politburo of elite journalists, editors and anchormen – convene in a secret chamber beneath the home of Sally Quinn where they plot to take over the United States of America. The organization was founded in 1… Read full post »