Mrs. G gave me a call this morning.  Berfore saying hello, she blurted out "Don't be surprised if you hear about an 85-year old getting arrested for stealing."

"What did you do now?"

"Nothing yet, but did you see the price of milk?  I was at Butera today and the woman next to me asked if she can reach for the gallon for me.  I told her, "I can't afford that.  Reach back there and get me the pint.  I add some water to it when my son adds it to his coffee.  He'll never know the difference and I'll have it straight in mine." She gave me the milk and I walked over and got shocked by the price of eggs."

 "So, what did you steal?"

"Nothing yet, but since you answered the phone I guess you're not working yet."

"You're right there.  I got two "fart-off-and-die" responses last week."

"Good."

"Good?"

"I'm planning a caper."

"Ha, ha, ha, was that you on the news last night?  I saw that a girl scout was robbed while selling her cookies."

"There's no money there.  I'm going after the trucks."

"Which trucks?"

"The trucks with the money."

"Those are the trucks with the guns too."

"You just have to be faster than them."

"You're 85 and have eight toes.  I just have to be faster than you.  Count me in."

"Come over later.  I have to go take a nap now."