MARCH 21, 2011 11:01PM

My iPhone Is Mean To Me

I had my first fight with my BFF, also known as my iPhone.

Let’s back up.  One of my favorite features of the iPhone 4 is organizing my apps into folders like this:

What a nice and neat iPhone screen.

Until I take a closer look… Read full post »

My sister’s birthday was Friday. She turned 107 years old.

Wait, I mean 27 years old. (Having a sister with a blog is FUN!)

When my parents brought her home from the hospital, I was 5 and a half. The oldest. The greatest. THE ONLY.

About 6 weeks into… Read full post »

I have gotten sick more this winter than any other time that I can remember. IN MY LIFE. I know that I’m all old and gray now, but I’m also tired. Oh, and tired of being sick, too.

I caught my kids’ cold last week. I KNOW.… Read full post »

MARCH 16, 2011 11:55PM

Women More Beautiful Than I

When I attend a concert, I don’t think: Wow! With a few guitar lessons and some willpower, I’ll be playing up on stage in no time.

When I go to a great restaurant, I don’t think: Wow! With the right ingredients, I’ll be cooking a five star Beef Wellington.

But when… Read full post »

MARCH 15, 2011 11:37PM

I Can’t Kill Plants

I had a magnificent vegetable and herb garden in our first home. The salads, pesto and mint tea I MADE FROM IT were fantastic. My plants grew big and fast, and I was hooked.

When I was pregnant with our second baby, I decided that, despite my swollen belly,… Read full post »

MARCH 15, 2011 1:56AM

The Quiet Is Safe

The ugliness of my day inspires me to stay up all night if only to slow the return of another.

The longer I sit, ignoring sleep, the more difficult my tomorrow becomes.

But the idea of closing my eyes, when next they would open to sunshine and appointments and life, keeps… Read full post »

MARCH 13, 2011 10:30PM

My Daughter Thinks She Is Jesus

I’m playing with my daughter, N. We are using small plastic people from such adventures as “Mama and Dada Bring a Baby Home and Eat Ice Cream†and “I Go to a School Where a Dog is My Only Classmateâ€.

Not to be outdone, my daughter creates a diverse family… Read full post »

I believe in free speech more than I believe in being offended. I also believe in loving the people who do despicable things. Should I become Amish?

Oh wait, my sweet, sweet iPhone.

You can read my take on the Westboro Baptist Church when… Read full post »

We might not all be Christians (yet! haha. {sigh}), but I think that Lent has a universal appeal. The lapsed Catholics, the bored Jews and the even the atheist has a place in their heart for Lent.

Is it because we are all so self-sacrificing? Because we are so… Read full post »

MARCH 9, 2011 5:06PM

What If We All Adopted?

A friend once said to me: Don’t you think the most eco-friendly thing you could do would be to not produce another person?

I looked down at my pregnant belly.  Before I had children, I knew that I would adopt. I was so sure of myself.

Lately, I’ve felt stretched… Read full post »

MARCH 8, 2011 10:47PM

Sometimes You Just Miss Him

On our first Valentine’s Day as a married couple, Scott adopted a cat for me, thus proving how much he loved me. Mostly because he married into three cats already, one of which refused to let him sit next to me for the first six months that we dated.

We… Read full post »

MARCH 7, 2011 10:35PM

How To High Five Yourself

Thanks to a twitter conversation with @AllFookedUpToo, I was inspired to create a tutorial for people who hate other people but still do awesome things that deserve high fives.  Or for people who do something hilarious and happen to be alone.  Those guys can watch it, too.

If you cannot… Read full post »

MARCH 6, 2011 9:39PM

I Pick My Nose

We have a zit sighting and we're going in

And ears.

Between my teeth.

Under my fingernails.

The corners of my eyes, too.

I’m a picker.

I love finding boogers, wax, scabs, zits.

I’m always looking for more crust to pick off. It feels…. satisfying.… Read full post »

I don’t consider myself a stress case. I have some anxiety around how much people suck, but beyond that, I’m pretty cool with life.

I’ve always thought it was because I’m awesome.

Lately, I’ve realized that it’s not. I just grind the crap out of my teeth to deal… Read full post »

MARCH 2, 2011 10:36PM

Born Poor

Anyone with ears or eyes has seen people discussing government spending. The economist, teachers, politicians and the mystical middle class all weighing in on the pros and cons and statistics and surveys about how much we are or aren’t spending and why it’s good or bad.

America is struggling to… Read full post »

MARCH 1, 2011 11:03PM

Feet Phobia

When I was a teenager, I hated feet. I hated mine. I hated yours. I thought that all feet were ugly and weird, and I hoped that someone would remove them in the night and replace them with shoes. Perma-shoes.

I remember my first pair of open-toed… Read full post »

I show up at a play area to meet up with a friend.

The friend is great.

The other family in the play area is not.

A boy about five years old purposefully knocks over my daughter. Twice. I could see that his newest sibling had just began to… Read full post »

FEBRUARY 27, 2011 11:10PM

Butt-less Forks

I finish ordering Friday night’s pizza when I note how quiet it is. I look around and realize it’s been ten minutes too long since I’ve seen my son.

I walk from room-to-room with my daughter at my side until I see E sitting very still on the couch.

E… Read full post »

The video of the firefighters entering the Rotunda in support of the protesters in Wisconsin made me cry. (If you can’t see the video, click here.)

I was tired when I wrote my sign:

Teachers teach my child. Let them bargain so they're paid what my

Read full post »

I don’t consider myself particularly naive. I’ve LIVED. I’ve seen and even been the HUMAN CONDITION.

But I have had a few incidents lately that make me wonder if I am fooling myself about the Internet and privacy.

Here’s one example: I answered a question that someone… Read full post »

FEBRUARY 23, 2011 11:02PM

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

Thank you for all the amazing comments on yesterday’s post, I think that I’ll dedicate a post, hopefully each week and possibly on the same day, to the world beyond my little home. PS. This post isn’t one of them.

Scott and I go to the movies.

Every twenty minutes I… Read full post »

FEBRUARY 22, 2011 10:45PM

Ordinary Opinions On A Ordinary Life

My life is ordinary. I blog about the funny and serious moments. I attempt to bring them to life for you and for me.

I believe the significance of ordinary moments.

But I find myself hiding in my ordinary life. Wrapping myself in the day-to-day so I don’t… Read full post »

FEBRUARY 21, 2011 10:34PM

Where I Give Business Advice

So you want me to hire you?  And you can’t do what you do virtually?  You will need to enter my home?  Possibly while I’m not there. Or while I’m there with two small children?

Let me give you some advice.

Don’t drop off this pamphlet at my house unless… Read full post »

I have no words for the joy this series of bad quality pictures brought me.

If my Flickr slideshow doesn’t work for you, the pictures are also below.

Look! I'm picking my nose on the iPhone. OH NOES I Can Make Faces Too He's Beautiful Where'd He Go? Eating Your Brain HEHHEH Eating My Brain So Much Brain. Must Eat Twice. Yum I Love This Picture Heehee To This Awesomeness Yes Mouths Are Cool IMG_0983 IMG_0984 IMG_0985 IMG_0990Read full post »

Note: When I really started to think about this, I can see why there are atheist. You godly people have been warned.

Why McDonalds is good: The best french fries on earth. Hands down and if you argue with me, you’ll just be confirming that you’re crazy.
Why McDonaldsRead full post »