Lea Lane

Lea Lane
Location
Florida, USA
Birthday
August 26
Title
freelance writer/editor
Bio
I've been around the block (more like around the world). I've played and loved and lived an unconventional life in conventional trappings. I've been a corporate VP, worked with foster kids, acted in an Indie ("Nurse 1"), was on Jeopardy!. I'll write just about anything, from speeches to comedy sketches to feature articles. I've been managing editor of a travel publication, authored six books, including Solo Traveler:Tales and Tips for Great Trips (Fodor's), blog regularly on major sites, and have contributed (mostly anonymously) to everything from encyclopedias to guidebooks. I was divorced late, widowed early -- and dated lots -- and I survived a scary illness. After being happily, peacefully solo for many years, I just started a live-in relationship. I founded and still edit www.sololady.com, a lfestyle Website for single women. I'm truly grateful for each precious day, each well-earned wrinkle, my family, my cat. Truth, laughter, friendship. And now this blog -- on this wonderful site!

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NOVEMBER 12, 2008 6:43PM

OS Turned My Ugly Duckling into a Swan

Rate: 6 Flag
It was a sweet, funny story, an ugly duckling growing-up thing,and it was one of the first posts I sent in, on an early September evening. In it I had opened up a bit and I liked it, but when the post got zero comments and zero ratings I doubted my judgment. Yet I posted more. Writers do.

 

Last week there was a call for old posts and when I looked at my ugly duckling one I thought, nah, there are others I wrote that didn’t get much attention but that at least were rated and had comments. Then a voice inside me said, “No, mention the completely forgotten one. Maybe it was lost and just fell into that huge slush pile at the editor's door. Give it a chance.”

 

So I added it to the list on the post last week, low and late. And that was that. Except for one thing. When I checked it out the other day I couldn’t believe my eyes. There, in the right hand corner, were two new words: “Editor's Pick.”

With a wink and a nod the editors of this wonderful site gave me belated kudos, taught me to trust my gut, acknowledged they get bogged down, and encouraged me to keep at it. A good lesson to remember.

With their approval I offer my renamed, newly verified post to you:

 

the_ugly_duckling

 

My Ugly Duckling Post that Turned into an Editor’s Pick -- Two Months Later

With another school year starting, I think back to my least favorite first day in class, back in the 1950s when I was beginning seventh grade at Nautilus Junior High School in Miami Beach. Kids called it “Nauseous” because of the color of the facade, and the lousy lunches.

I looked awful. My mother had taken me to a hair stylist who had chopped off my copper-colored hair. My face had recently erupted into a repository of pent up hormonal confusion. Now, set among the zits and freckles, one eye seemed bigger than the other, or was I imagining it? My eyebrows were almost as thick as Frieda Kahlo’s. Of course I didn’t know of her then. I thought I was the only one cursed with a unibrow.

A misjudged dive that summer into a day-camp pool left my nose with a vague bump, and my mother kept reminding me to push it, an inexplicable exercise in futility that left me looking like I was perpetually picking my nose. My teeth were newly braced in metal, and I had to be diligent to keep greens from clinging like vines on a chain fence.

My full lips were ahead of their time. “Don’t pout,” my mom would say, looking up from I Love Lucy. “Pull in your bottom lip.” A lot to take in for a 12-year old: biting her lip against her sharp braces while pushing the new bump on her nose with bitten fingernails. How I had time to bite my nails while I was pushing my nose, I have no idea.

My body had become no better than my head. I was thin (“skinny” back then), except for my newly hairy legs. Nobody I knew shaved their legs at that age, let alone waxed them. My chest was about the only thing that had stayed the same as ever, unfortunately. My posture was schlumpy. (Why should I stand straight? I felt as bad as I looked.)

My stylish Aunt Hilda, who was fashion-forward even in Manhattan, sent down the kind of clothes from Henri Bendel that no one in my crowd had ever seen; it would be years before my friends would catch up to sack dresses. The clothing needed to be dry cleaned, but that didn’t stop my grandma from scrubbing it on a washboard and then hanging it on a rusty wire hanger.

Never mind “sweet” and “funny” and “smart.” Those phone compliments from my Aunt Hilda rolled right off me as I concentrated on my terrible façade. I did like my thin wrists, and my thighs weren’t awful, but nobody would see them except at gym, in my baggy gym suit. So there I was, off to the unforgiving world of junior high: skinny, uni-browed, braced, pimply, flat-chested, pushing my nose and sucking in my bottom lip, wearing an un-ironed sack that didn’t even fit like a sack, with rust stains on the shoulders.

My one hope was that maybe the friends I hadn’t seen over the summer had fared as badly as I had, and that I’d sit next to a nerdy boy from North Beach Elementary who would remember my better years. No such luck. In homeroom I sat next to Elaine, who had just moved to Miami Beach from the Midwest. Her eyes seemed as big and blue-green as the Atlantic a few blocks east. Her thick wavy hair was the color of the beach, her smooth skin was lightly tanned, and she had a burgeoning bosom beneath a crisp, white blouse. This glowing girl smiled, and of course her teeth were perfect.

If you had asked me then if I could imagine that Elaine would one day marry the major mogul of Las Vegas I wouldn’t have been at all surprised. (And, of course, she did.) But if you had predicted that someday I would date the president of a movie company, or a sports commissioner, I would have been devastated by the taunt.

Or, closer to home, if anyone suggested that scrawny, pouty me would date – even marry -- our high school’s “Mr. Wonderful,” I would have shyly looked at my big feet to hide the tears. But yes, just like in a fairy tale, those very things happened! I may not have become a swan, but with time and Clearasil, makeup and tweezers and a good haircut, clothes that fit and the miracles of science, the ugly faded. And I guess that the special things I dismissed about me mattered after all.

I just wish I could have believed all that, long ago on the first day of school at Nauseous Junior High.

 

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I loved it! And, looking at your picture now, it's hard to imagine that you were ever the ugly duckling you described. I'm glad things turned out so well for that little girl. Thumb!
Thanks, Marple but true, so true. I developed writing skills then figuring I could hide away a bit.
Lea, Awesome post!!!! "All good things come to he/she who waits..." No idea where that came from but just popped into my mind after reading your "refurbed post." Good call in bringing it back!!!
Great post Lea. "Late Bloomers" are always the most beautiful flowers...
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
"Better late than never."
Cliche's exist for a reason.
You certainly are a beauty now, and I'm sure were then too. Maybe you just didn't know it. :-)
Believe it or not I've always envied the ugly duckling story. My friend Nathalie is gorgeous beyond words, was really homely in her age 9-11 pics. By comparison I went from looking ok to...staying ok. No big transformation in face of self confidence. Just the same face I have had since I was 5, basically. Yawn.
Lea, I think ugly ducklings always turn out to be the most spectacular beautiful women. You are testimony to that. So glad this post got recycled. You're being green and prolific at the same time! The EP is always a great validation.
Lovely story! I am so glad that you brought it back.

Reminds me of our own ugly duckling at our 20 year HS reunion. She had been ungainly, large black glasses, and she showed up just gorgeous. However, she was hurt when people told her that she had changed the most! Perhaps she had not realized her "lack of beauty" before.
rated
Why am I the only male to comment on this? A sad commentary fellas...Sad. Lea deserves better! ;-)
Yes these stories often have happy endings which makes them popular with romanticists. Maybe that's why it seems to appeal to the gals here, Greg. The main point is that I felt pretty hopeless for a couple of years and had no idea anyone else did. I focused on the worst things. Maybe girls do that more. Now that I'm older I feel that way again --the freckles are coming back as age spots. ;)
I'm so glad that this piece finally got the attention that it deserved, Lea. You should let Lisa Romero know. I'm sure she'll be thrilled!
Yes, I did write Lisa R about it. Was a really good idea and I know that many of us have posts that deserve more attention.
G.T., I've already been accused of flirting with Lea, so demur, except to say, nice job, milady.
Thank you Randy. I appreciate your bravery coming over here.
Wonderful! As a side note...I went to my 25th HS reunion (five years ago) and was shocked to be voted the Most Changed Female out of three graduating classes. I'm still not sure how to take it!
I would take it as a compliment, GL!
I have no reason to doubt your memories of how you looked in junior high, but I'd have to agree with all that the stunning eventual result is sweet justice. Anyone who is a cross between Jackie O and Audrey Hepburn is a winner in my book.
Lea,
Barry said it. And he said it much better than I could have ever said it!
Transformation is a journey, like anything else,.....fraught with wonders......
Thanks, guys. I wasn't fishing for compliments but it feels really nice to get them. I do remember that time as painful, and we don't shake those impressions easily. I guess guys had their own version but we are so judged on appearance and conforming when we are young and I certainly didn't conform.
I've never worried too much about rejection as a writer, since the time, years ago, when I received a scathing rejection from a small, local paper. The editor told me I was a lousy writer and should just stop! He also said he would pay me 500 dollars if I ever published the thing. I was momentarily crushed, but then looked the piece
over, decided it was too good for the tasteless jerk at that paper and
sent it on to a major paper with a large circulation, where it was promptly accepted. Naturally, I sent the editor a copy, and never heard from him again. I enjoyed getting the last laugh, though, more than I can say. Writing is a subjective thing, and you, and no one else, get to decide if it's good.
I agree, Gayle. I can tell when I write something worthwhile. The longer I do it the better I am at judging. And yet, there is just the slightest question if your efforts go ignored. You wonder why. Often it doesn't have the least bit to do with the quality.