foxnews.com
The health care bill that just passed in congress is not perfect, but hooray, more than 30 million Americans who were previously uninsured will soon be able to afford insurance, preconditions will no longer prevent us from getting treatment, and we will be able to change jobs without losing benefits.
In addition, this hard-fought reform offers several immediate and eventual bonuses you may not have thought of. Among them:
1- You will no longer have to perform an unnatural sex act on your specialist to get an insured appointment.
2- If you get a rash you can get it treated quickly in the emergency room on a Sunday afternoon without having to sit on the floor for six hours reading torn, grubby old copies of In Touch, with dozens of people coughing in your face and babies in dirty diapers screaming in your ears as you scratch yourself so hard you bleed.
3- Grassley’s smug mug and the constant grimaces of Ben Nelson, Blanche Lincoln, Bart Stupak and other health care stars will be long past. And you can watch Fox Noise and see Beck, O’Reilly, Malkin, Morris and the blonde bimbo gang squirm, cry, snarl and threaten about death panels and the end of America – and you can jump up and down and do a little hokey-pokey.
4- You’ll be able to use your copy of the health care reform bill as a doorstop or a 10-pound weight.
5- “Tea bag” can once again be said without visualizing an angry right winger’s balls.
6- You can email a heartfelt bon voyage message to Rush Limbaugh, who vowed he’d leave the country if health care reform passed. Go here, to join others.
7- You might start a Facebook group “Na-na-na- na- na- you selfish twits, we got it done.” Or become a Facebook fan of ABBA's "Waterloo."
8- The Republicans will officially be known the "Know Nothing, No, Nothing!" anti-health party and Michelle Bachmann will rise to the titular head.
9- Congress can focus on jobs and help the Dems keep seats in 2010, allowing for more possible reforms now that they can get their act together.
And, last but by no means least:
10- You don’t have to feel so embarrassed that health care is a privilege decided by insurance companies.
At least for the moment.
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ccdarling
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Anyone care for some hot tea?
We should all be proud and grateful that this bill passed...as I understand it, the vote was very close.
That said, let's all shout out one big "YIPPEE!"
R
Oh darn.... how do you think I got through the last year, Lea? =o)
But no matter! A bon voyage card to Rush Limbaugh? How about a whole suitcase? Well, at least an overnight bag. With a Berlitz phrasebook. One of the other pleasures of this is, the joke's on him; now he's going to have to learn Spanish AND learn what it's like to be a minority in a land where he doesn't speak the language! The joke's DOUBLY on him because he'd be fleeing socialized medicine for a country where socialized medicine is an established fact.(Okay, I know, it's naiive to think he's going to really go. We won't be rid of him that easily. But I'm in too good a mood to care. =o)
For many this isn't a joke. This isn't a bill to celebrate. It is a huge disappointment. A windfall for insurance companies and a screw job for the people.
Give it time and even you happy little Obama sheep may figure out you've been betrayed.
23,000 Americans A Year To Die Unnecessarily
How do you justify these deaths?
#6 makes it all worthwhile. Plus, I won't need to worry so much about ever seeing his name next to Sandra Stephens on a headline that also included the word bed AGAIN. I hope.
#8 America has a long, long way to go before we can start talking about feeling "less" embarrassed.
But at least we are treading water now.
I hope my insured friends find this to be a positive, as for me I doubt it will make much difference.
I'm not happy with the bill, but getting rid of Rush "me to a pharmacy" Limblower is worth my worries about the bill's diluted purpose.
He's not going to leave, is he?
I think it was Churchill who said that you can always depend on America to do the right thing,,,,after they've tried everything else.
I listen to Farts News on weekends when MSNBC is running prison life crap. Those guys are likely going nuts right now. Maybe Beck will have a meltdown on national TV. I can't wait!
I wonder how Rushbo will explain that he is not actually leaving. As much as I'd like it, I do not believe that it actually will happen.
Hooray! They did it! They totally did!
-- Steve, yippee!
-- Bernadine, and backatcha.
-- Roger, I doubt in this economy anyone will give up their jobs.
-- Shiral, Rush will be interesting to listen to today. All of those guys will be.
-- BBE, I admire your passion and beliefs, but there would have been 30 plus more millions at risk. It's a half full compromise, but a start. I hear you.
-- Stim, clever, clever you.
-- Julie, let's start a Facebook page and send him a one-way ticket to lower Slobovia --upper Slobovia is too nice --been there :)
-- Ablonde, I am less embarrassed now America has done something that is on the moral high road.
-- As usual, on the money Tom. Can I use it.
-- Jay, we can only hope he leaves.
-- Pilgrim, don't scratch. It's not good for you!
-- Leonde, there will always be lots of people in the ER as long as there are accidents and crises, just maybe just not as many with coughs.
--Sophie, so let's cautiously celebrate. A little Yip!
--Michael, yes today is the day to listen to Fox Noise.
-- Snowball, let's see him ignore that.
--designanator, if people like their current situation they can keep it according to this bill. :)
Seriously, if you want a surprisingly good take on health reform, find what Bush speechwriter David Frum wrote yesterday. He thinks the GOP outsmarted itself with its tactics and marginalized itself further. He called it the party's "Waterloo." (Which reminds me, time for some Abba.)
Seriously, if you want a surprisingly good take on health reform, find what Bush speechwriter David Frum wrote yesterday. He thinks the GOP outsmarted itself with its tactics and marginalized itself further. He called it the party's "Waterloo." (Which reminds me, time for some Abba.)
-- sixtycandles, I have a slight suspicion that they will find someone or something right away to keep the teabags flying.
-- Robin, I'm with you. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
-- Great adds, sheep.
-- BV, goodnight John Boy! (John Boehner, John McCain, etc.)
-- foolish monkey, it should pass. We'll know soon.
Oh, by the way: Congrats to the lot of you. I didn't have a horse in that race, but a lot of friends here on OS and elsewhere are going to be better off.
RATED
L.
It's a good thing that "humor is the best medicine," since the real benefits of this bill may be long in coming or still with red tape and loop holes to jump through to get the benefits. I'll beleive it when I see it. It will likely take time and waiting before insurance companies can digest and transistion to the new "rules." I am sceptical but hopeful. In the meatime, as you have pointed out, there is humor to be had. And that ain't bad.
God, I hate feeling like this!
1. Become a fan of Sen. Jim DeMint, who said that health care reform would "be Obama's Waterloo" and "would break him." Notice that he doesn't have a plan for health care reform himself; he just doesn't like ANYTHING the Democrats do because they're Democrats.
2. Post a YouTube video of ABBA singing "Waterloo"
Seriously, it's silly, but his Facebook fan page is full of HUNDREDS of singing Swedes. (And, of course, Sweden has had universal healthcare for quite some time, has a healthier population than we do, and somehow hasn't turned into Soviet Russia...)
-- New buddha Fun, thanks.
-- cartouche, that's called a compromise.
--Boa, thanks for giving us a model that we can point to and not gloating about it. We're getting there. And I doubt Rush is leaving -- he tends to bloviate, wouldn't you say?
-- Lin that would really be taking one for the team. I have a feeling there would be millions of vounteers if it meant he'd be gone.
-- Joan, you got it; the beginning of what may take years to tweak.
-- Amanda, thanks for spreading the word.
-- Libmom, the visual of those particular heads exploding is pretty tough!
-- Dorinda, can't wait to read about your first-person tea party experience.
-- Clark you should have gotten into Superman persona and swooshed in. He who hesitates ....
-- Nikki, I hear you. Maybe the people will create a bi-partisan push for faster start-ups once they understand what's at stake.
-- greenheron, very funny. That's call Ick syndrome and one of the prescriptions is to stop watching cable news.
-- Silkstone, the world was coming to an end every time a progressive bill gets passed.
-- McKenna, it's fun to gloat when it's for the right thing.
-- Thanks, Fusan. For America!
-- Tom, best offer I've had in a long while.
-- Jimmy, they do seem to portend the end of the world for doing the right thing. We have to learn from this and be strong when the cause is right.
--Same to you Hawley, and glad that you got the cover you deserved for Nina's story.
-- Bill, couldn't ask for a better response.
-- Jonathan, Radio Bastards is an interesting way to put it.
-- Thanks, Dr. V.
While I like some of the major provisions that have been highlighted, I'm left wondering if it's too good to be true.
What I didn't like about the bill is the way that it was forced through. I am rooting for President Obama but he has so much to learn about being a leader of people. His OJT is quite amusing at times. Until you realize that the rest world is watching. And then its not so amusing!