This is a meme going around Facebook.  It's a bit on the teeny-bopper side, but still could be interesting.  Copy, cut, and paste into your own blogs with your own answers, because I want to know all about you, but not in a stalker kind of way.

1. Who was your FIRST prom date? I didn't do proms, much to my Mom's disappointment. She had a whole closet full of gowns she'd picked up at Goodwill over the years that she wanted to see me in. When I asked her if she had a little black Breakfast at Tiffany's kind of dress for my Vampire Audrey Hepburn Mardi Gras costume, she was able to pull out not one, not two, but THREE dresses for me to choose from. I think she was so happy to finally get a picture of me in an evening gown that she ignored the cape, fangs, and fake blood.

2. Who was your FIRST love and do you still talk with him/her?  Dominic Simmonds.  We got into an argument on the first day of fourth grade about which Ninja Turtle carried which weapon.  I don't remember the specifics, but I remember that he was WRONG and that now-familar sinking/floating feeling beginning.  This love was as far as I know unrequited and all-consuming and lasted six or seven years.  He did get me started on reading Calvin and Hobbes, and he was right...it WAS a great comic strip about much more than a boy and his stuffed tiger.  I haven't seen or heard from him since high school graduation. I found him on MySpace, though. He looks exactly the same as he did when he was nine, just older. It's kind of creepy.

3. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink? I had a beer at my cousin Angie's wedding reception. I was eleven years old. Now, I was tall for my age and had boobs, but I was wearing this little-girl dress with a sash and a big white collar and patent leather Mary Jane shoes and white knee socks and had a giant white bow in my hair. Also, I was ELEVEN YEARS OLD. Yet no one stopped me from getting a Budweiser or walking around with it all night. This is what makes me proud to be a German from southeastern Indiana.

4. What was your FIRST job? Bedpan wrangler, Dreyerhaus Nursing Home.

5. What was your FIRST car? First car I drove regularly: Shitty Shitty Bang Bang, my Dad's 1983 Buick Skylark. First and only car I owned: The Shark, my 1989 Chevy Corsica. (It was gray on the outside, blood-red on the inside, and whenever it stopped moving, it died.)

6. Who was the FIRST person to text you today? Domino's Pizza.  I can get a one-topping large pizza for only $6.  Two or more, and I can have them delivered.  Such a deal!

7. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning? Rick Barton, an English professor and provost at the University of New Orleans. He was in a recurring nightmare of mine involving being forced to take the SATs in a trailer outside a zoo somewhere in British Columbia. Your guess is as good as mine.

8. Who was your FIRST grade teacher? Mrs. Fields. She was evil.

9. When and where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane? I was 10; we flew from Indianapolis to Orlando, Florida, to go to Disney World.

10. Who was your FIRST best friend & do you still talk? Sarah Lecher, and I haven't seen or heard from her in ages.

11. Where was your FIRST sleepover? At my cousin Marysue's. We were I think five or so.  She had a bunch of her cousins from the other side of her family and neighbor girls over.  We watched Attack of the Killer Tomatoes and were surfing on the back of the couch. (Marysue, Mom totally didn't approve of the movies Aunt Judy let us watch when I slept over.)

12. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? Bob. But before I talked to him, I told Elvis to shut it already.

13. Whose wedding were you in the FIRST time? I have avoided walking that plank.

14. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? Yelled at Elvis to shut up.

15. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? All-4-One, Union Station, Indianapolis. August 1994.  The tickets cost $10 each.  Dad was so thrilled that me and my brother listened to "those nice boys" who "sang nice songs" and "could actually sing" that he paid for the tickets for all of the family and he and Mom went with us.  Neither of us was actually a big All-4-One fan; though we thought they we all right, we were just 14 and 12 and wanted to go to a concert because that's what older kids did.

16. FIRST tattoo? None.

17. FIRST piercing? Ears, and nothing else.  I was 19.  No fear of needles, and my Mom would have taken me to have it done any time I'd asked, but I didn't want it to be this mother-daughter barfo-bonding moment.  So I just drove to the Eastland Mall one Sunday when I was in college and did it.

18. FIRST foreign country you've been to? Canada. It barely counts.

19. FIRST movie you remember seeing in the theater? E.T. The Extraterrestrial.   My grandparents took me to see it at the Krump Theater in Columbus while my Mom was still in the hospital after having my brother.  The Krump was one of those old-fashioned family-run movie houses, but it had seen better days.  I remember that there were these non-functional castle-like balconies with turrets running along the side walls and alongside the screen.  The only part of the movie I remember is when Elliot is dissecting the frog in science class.  I really, really wanted to be a teenager when I saw that, because they got to dissect animals in school and that seemed so cool and glamourous.  I know.  I'm weird.

20. FIRST Detention you had? The first and only detention I ever had was in eighth grade. There was a mob scene at the trash cans to throw away our lunch stuff. I tried to lob a carrot stick over the crowd and into the trash can. Unfortunately, it hit Theresa Schottmer, who was slow, and Mrs. Smith, whose daughter Ann has Down's Syndrome, saw this and thought I was throwing food at the special ed kids. Never mind that I sat with Theresa on the school bus most every day.  I'm not going to claim I was never cruel for the sake of being cruel to other kids, but this wasn't one of those moments.   Anyway, I didn't raise a fuss and forgave her because of Ann, and Mrs. Smith and I got along all during high school speech meets. Her son Chris and I were on the speech team together.

21. What was the FIRST state you lived in? Indiana.

22. If you had three wishes, what would the FIRST one be? This is a trick question, and no good can come of it.

23. What is the FIRST thing you would learn if you had the chance? How to whistle. I can't do it. At all.