Leon Freilich

Leon Freilich
Park Slope, New York,
Ink, Inc.
Light verse is my medium For the war on tedium. Draw up a comfy chair, Give a look right here. What've you got to lose Other than the blues? Think of this as an app To make you a cheerier chapp.


Leon Freilich's Links

DECEMBER 9, 2013 12:57PM

Cinderella After the Ball

When the ball was quite over, heavy rain began,

Much like the monsoons that always cover the Sudan,

So she lifted the bottom of her ballroom gown

And attempted to cover her hair, luscious brown,

Yet she found herself drenched, increasingly so,

 And prayed for assistance from theRead full post »
DECEMBER 8, 2013 11:10AM

Sigmund Freud's Text

Freud believed with full sincerity

Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

Yes, the Bible wholly persuaded him that this

Is the true basis for psychoanalysis.
DECEMBER 7, 2013 4:57PM

Up A Tree

I'd never quarrel

With a squirrel

Or even quirrel

With a squarrel.

Don't have the guts.

Besides, it'd be nuts.
DECEMBER 7, 2013 11:02AM

Delete Online Shopping

Brick & mortar
Brick  & mortar
When you buy
That's where you ortar.

Create jobs
Consumer mates
Sock it to
Bezos and Gates. Read full post »
DECEMBER 6, 2013 3:15PM

Franco Lingo

Each film noir,
Bon ou mal,
Pivots on
Une femme fatal.

Or as we say,
Double quick,
Watch your back
And check the chick.
DECEMBER 5, 2013 3:19PM

2 Rx Drunkenness

Drink too much,
Drink too heavily?

No need to flip,
No need to flop--
Don't start
Or don't stop!

Read full post »

DECEMBER 4, 2013 12:25PM

Book War I

Let Amazon go with its drones

And drop them all over town--

Barnes & Noble's got

Rockets to shoot them down. Read full post »
DECEMBER 4, 2013 12:06PM

Essence of Senescence

Old age is at hand, you must confess

And certainly deplore,

When you start caring less and less

About more and more.
DECEMBER 1, 2013 5:43PM

Tsk, Tsk the Season

Black Friday's come and gone,
Cyber Monday's here--
Time and opportunity
To make new stuff appear.

Buy today, buy tomorrow,
Don't risk being rebuffed.
No time at all like the presents,
Till we're all of us stuffed.
NOVEMBER 29, 2013 12:23PM


My heart leaps up when I behold

A parking space--rarer than gold!
NOVEMBER 28, 2013 11:27AM

Grandma Yetta's Day

It's Thanksgiving,

Yes, yes,
And Grandma's urging,

"Es!  "Es!" Read full post »
NOVEMBER 27, 2013 11:31AM


Brooklyn cyclists
Run red lights
Defending their
Bikers' rights.

They're street pollution
By the Constitution.
NOVEMBER 25, 2013 10:22AM


NOVEMBER 24, 2013 12:43PM

How Now, Steed Breed?

Napoleon lives in this lovable creature
Always ready to take on contenders
Notwithstanding his sweetness feature--
Bandy, last of the public defenders.

Full of beans and high spirits,
This bantam Jack Russell Terrier
Dotes on
Read full post »
NOVEMBER 23, 2013 12:28PM

Turkey Light

Bake your turkey for eight days
Minimum oil, cha-cha-cha,

And what you get for your buffets

Is Thanskgiving-Hannukah.


  Read full post »

NOVEMBER 22, 2013 12:29PM

Bloomberg's Fa-La-La-La-La Folly

There was a old man known as Squeegee

Whose photo was taken by Weegee

Which when shown to the mayor

During Christmastime prayer

Led to Squeegie's expulsion to Fiji. Read full post »
NOVEMBER 21, 2013 1:26PM

Dictionary Darling

Do those addicted to selfies

Not have bats in their belfries?

Or do they need a fix

That's only fed with pix?

Could be that they hear

Selfie's the word of the year.

Or like Rembrandt & Van Gogh,

Themselves they seek to know.

Whichever, a flattering selfie

NOVEMBER 20, 2013 9:07AM

I Can Get It For You

The garmento knew many things  
But one thing he top-listed:
He wanted a wife who understood
The need to be tightfisted.                             &nbs… Read full post »
NOVEMBER 19, 2013 11:48AM

Snow Removal

Do you know that your face is all covered with snow?

Asks my girlfriend, Debby, who is always in the know.

No I don't, I reply, and then reach for a mirror.

And while she's not quite in the zone of error,

There's something to be said, so definitely said,

About her out-of-sight insight that… Read full post »
NOVEMBER 18, 2013 4:11PM

Real Estate Rules

Manhattan Borough President Scott Stringer: "The

entrance fee to live here is a million-dollar condo."
"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses,"'

Said Emma Lazarus--but time passes,

And the poor go back to being wretched refuse

For which the condo captains have no use.

NOVEMBER 17, 2013 1:45PM

Fall In the Air


NOVEMBER 16, 2013 5:30PM

Acing Ikea

They said it couldn't be done, they did,

The friends who know me as a squid,

A klutz when it comes to DIY,

Working from a kit, a supply

Of pieces tiny, large, all shapes,

In wood and steel and even crepes--

Not a single pal had faith he'd see a

Me-finished piece that came from Ikea.

Read full post »
NOVEMBER 16, 2013 11:39AM

Chars' Scars

Underpaid and overworked             .
Once a week or two,
Cleaning women share a secret
Not exactly new.

Never griping, never sniping
(So much they could say),
Household workers know too well
Grime does not pay.  Read full post »
NOVEMBER 15, 2013 11:15AM

Table of Babel

There is no coffee table book
I do not lust to own,
And so I've bought a ton or two.
(None of which I'll loan.)

They're piled up high on my teetering table,
All oversize and pricey:
American lit and motion pictures,
Both classical and spicy.

Gigantic tomes on modern art
And music of the baroque,
Large volumes… Read full post »
NOVEMBER 14, 2013 2:56PM

Youth Will Be Served

When you see a restaurant menu

Saying  "Brunch served 1 to 4,"            

Odds are long that you're unwelcome

If you're 35 or more

Read full post »