The closing credits are rolling on the Oscar telecast. I am underwhelmed, to say the least. What a colossal snooze fest!
Ixnay on the ostshay, okay? Franco has the personality of a sedated gerbil and Anne Hathaway is so damned adorable it’s sickening. Who yells “Woooo!!!!!” after each introduction? No Oscar host I’ve ever seen. I say bring back the old school hosts. Pronto!
Since all the money was on The King’s Speech, I was hoping for at least one or two upsets to spice up the telecast. Not one time was there a surprised gasp from the audience. Did I say gasp? Hell, there was barely any applause, mostly due to lack of interest, I’d say. I think I saw that madcap Roberto guy – the one who walked on the backs of the theater seats and jumped up and down a while when he won for Il Postino Life is Beautiful (thanks, Lea!) that year – nodding off in the fourth row.
The one thing I could always count on for Oscar night entertainment in the past didn’t even happen tonight. I didn’t see one Bork-worthy get up. Even Helen Bonham Carter looked half-way put together…well, for her. I never thought I’d live long enough to say this, but I miss Cher and her Bob Mackie nudie costumes. Tonight there were only gorgeous, colorful and well-fitting dresses. Well, I did wonder what milkmaid Cate Blanchett
What happened to all the shtick? Remember Palance and his one-handed pushups? How about Billy Crystal riding a horse to the microphone? Oh, and remember this: Uma, Oprah…Oprah, Uma? The only thing that happened off-script tonight was the decidedly inelegant F-bomb lobbed by Best Supporting Actress winner Melissa Leo for The Fighter. (Which, by the way, I predicted in an earlier post)
There were moments in the production that left me totally confused. No less than Celine Dion sauntered onto the stage with no introduction and started singing “Smile” (you know…when your heart is aching) And because there were pictures of people who had died during the year flipping by on the screen over her left shoulder, no one applauded. Awkward.
The last dead person’s photo on the screen was Lena Horne. Suddenly, Halle Berry is standing there in all her splendor reciting…no, make that reading…words to the effect that Ms. Horne had opened the doors of Hollywood so that people like her and Denzel and Jennifer Hudson and Whoopi Goldberg and Cuba Gooding, Jr. could win Oscars. Well, okay, but… Do you think they did that because of all the hoopla about there not being any actors of any color other than white among this year’s nominees? Awkward.
Surely, the Academy of Motion Pictures blah, blah, blah can do better than this. Even I could have produced a show that bad. Sheesh!
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janicephelpswilliams
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Muse: Me too. I kept waiting for something to happen -- all night!
I didn't watch much of the show. The signal for ABC to my set was really bad, yay for digital broadcast, a big rain storm whooshes through and ABC goes from A++++ signal to F- If me and the wifey sat a certain way, it was clear, but man, sitting on the roof top during a thunderstorm, yeah, Oscars aren't worth all that and a bag of chips plus Family Guy 1 hour Christmas special, was funny!!
But I got to see the best part of the show, Bob Hope. Billy Crystal.
And uh, some horrible singing of songs from this year's movies. I really think they should drop that for the broadcast. There hasn't been a good movie sound track since, hell, EVER!!
Anne Hathway did a lot of wardrobe changes because, well, why not? It gives Joan Rivers and her fashion police something to talk about later on today!! I believe there should be more wardrobe changes, right on stage!! LET US SEE YOUR UNDIES, OR LACK THEREOF!!
Except you Mr. Beatty!! Teeheehee!!
I seen one protest speech and I agreed, PUT ALL THE BANKERS IN JAIL WHO CAUSED THIS MESS!! Wooooo!! I clapped during that speech.
I switched over before the announcement of best picture and I watched wolves of Yellowstone kill a bison. It was awesome.
Rated.
Also, no more of that sad 'Heres who died this year...' sheesh, half the people watching the show are going, "Who?" so instead, we broadcast half naked showgirls and what the hell, showboys!!
GAWD!!! :D
Rolling: I think the whole awards show format has run its course. Enough, already!
Tink: I'm glad you think he was stoned. That didn't occur to me, but it sure explains a lot! It would be hilarious to just pull people off the street.
Flower Child: I'm just a creature of habit, I guess.
I'd like to add --- I like him. He seems cool. If he'd do an interview with me, one on one, I'd probably post the sucker right here, and die, as life would have no more meaning left, it would be perfect.
:D
On the bright side at least the Oscars taught the Staten Island P.S. 22 5th-grade chorus an important life lesson. That it's not about the music, it's about the packaging .
ps. John Boehner has officially declared the Oscar show an abortion. He's now seeking to cut its funding and FCC license
What a snooze fest. Nice tribute to those dead people and Lena H.
NOT!
Next time don't bbther.
Theresa: I so agree!
The Obsolete Man: Hahahaha!
Christine: You, a geezer??? Naw…
Joanie: Thanks, my dear
Algis: Oh, my goodness! I don’t know what to say… I’d like to thank my high school typing teacher...
Bob: I think they must have a computer operating the delay button. Anything that starts with an ‘f’ followed by a ‘u’ is automatically bleeped. Welcome back, my friend.
Scanner: You were smarter than I was!
Toritto: So sayeth the king.
Duane: You made the much better choice. I love Weeds!
(Oh, and I think the movie that the chair-jumping dude was in was "Life is Beautiful," not "Il Postino." Wonder what happened to him?
blah and rated with hugs
♥R
Best Wishes,
Blittie
Susie: Thanks!
Lea: I think Ms. Leo was just trying to show us how authentic she was in her role! Lol Thanks for the correction. That was a while back and I was too sleepy, I guess, to check my facts.
Belinda: A waste of air time it was.
Sophie: Unfortunately I was wide awake. lol
greenheron: You were smart, g.
Jonathan: Much better choice, my friend. Thanks for reading, though.
Linda: YOU have a bible-thumping friend????????]
Fusun: Your time was much better spent, dear one. That post for Cranky’s birthday is outstanding!
Looks like I didn't miss anything by watching vids of House and a modern Sherlock Holmes...
r
Jeanette: I’m so sorry to hear about your burglary! Jerks!
Kate: Thanks. I wish I could say I am happy I covered it for you. lol
Bamy: Whoopi and Billy together would be outrageous, in a good way. At least there would be some laughs.
Great report, Lezlie. Thanks for sharing your memories.
I couldn't care less, because so many have already earned their place as Oscar winners, and some years will just be sparse.
But I was cheered that the trailer park, tea party films like True Grit did not waste my time!
Actually, Tyler Perry, with his origins in Chitlin' Circuit plays, is worth $800 mil! So screw the Oscars and thank God for BET and TV1!
As for the Brits, those actors learn and know their doggone craft. They can be ugly as sin, but we don't care because they can transport an audience.
Natalie Portman stole my heart a generation ago in the real world version of True Grit: The Professional. Christian Bale has earned his keep, too.
I kept wanting to CHANGE parts of Kate Blanchetts dress.
Natalie Portman's costume changes were a spoof on those awful Star Wars movies, where she had different clothes and hair for every scene.
The best part of these Oscars? No Ricky Gervais! ha ha!
Well done and zuma-oscarworthy-pick.
Jennifer Hudson's dress was horrid. It was beautiful except in the chest area--oh dear.... no....
and worst of all, very worst of all, The Social Network not taking Top Honor when it's THE defining movie of the decade... and David F, David F.... so deserved Best Director. . . .at least Sorkin won. And Portman. And I was happy for Colin too. But please..... please.... please..... when something as brave, funny, intelligent, creative, and important as The Social Network is passed over and then Franco is hosting.... just sigh.
Zuma: The number of British and Aussie accents was kind of bothersome to me, too, but I chastised myself for thinking like an ugly American. We seem to be losing our grasps of just about everything. Thanks for the ZP
Kosh: Happy to be of service. Thanks for the compliment.
Sweetfeet: It just really didn’t work at all.
Bb: Thanks. Good to see you.
D Art: Thanks.
Renee: I totally agree about the Social Network. That little brainiac has changed the way the world functions and the movie was extremely well-crafted.
I like Cate's dress, except for the unfortunate bib look there in the middle. Imagine how Oprah would have filled that out! She looked equipped to take out a battleship with her torpedos, but the dress was nice given it's limitations.
Good overview L.
About the dress; take the top off; take off those ridiculous knife-edge sleeves; reuse the beads to outline a more flattering neckline; and I like the dress, too. lol
The only interesting moments were clips of Bob Hope actually being FUNNY and Billy Crystal's self-deprecating live appearance. I would have welcomed more footage from Johnny Carson's masterful reign, and Steve Martin (without Alec Baldwin--whoever decided there have to be two hosts?!?) handled the hosting duties with his unique, dry charm.
This year's ceremony's producers appear to have forgotten the very purpose of the evening: to honor the recipients and plug this year's crop of films. Too much emphasis was placed on the TV show. For me the most boring moment of the night was ABC's announcement they have contracted to host the Oscar broadcast until 2012. Oh, please! Speaking of boring, who wrote the embarassing drivel spoken by the Oscar presenters? It made me long for the spontaneous quips voiced by past celebrities. They were class acts!