Beyond the Pale

Just Laugh

lockyer

lockyer
Location
Wilmington, North Carolina,
Birthday
July 29
Title
"Has Potential"
Bio
A middle class mother of three, recovering alcoholic, occasionally funny, mildly sarcastic, appropriate crier who tips well

MY RECENT POSTS

Lockyer's Links

Salon.com
SEPTEMBER 24, 2010 2:42PM

25 questions - Trost and myself

1. Lingerie & pajamas. Bullshit. What do you really sleep in?  

Anything cotton, mostly pajama pants and camisole tops. My husband negotiates for sleeping in the nude and jokes it's the cure for all things. If I have a headache his response will be "You know the cure for that? Sleeping… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 24, 2010 1:39PM

Don't touch the knife

I have no idea why I did it. So many people in my life have gaped at me in unadulterated shock at my stupidity while words of comfort roll off their tongues.  "No one knows what they would do in a situation like that", "There was so much happening so fast,… Read full post »

APRIL 15, 2010 4:48PM

No 5k for my vagina

There was a time when the word cancer was whispered. Woman would gather in the kitchen over coffee and a cake that one had brought and discuss the news of the week. Greta was visiting relatives in Great Neck. Nancy was going to a resort in the Adirondacks with the childrenRead full post »

FEBRUARY 27, 2010 10:54PM

Bloody denial

Four years ago today things were not going according to plan! I needed to be making cupcakes for Charlie’s birthday tonight. This wasn’t good. My stomach was rolling and waves of dizziness forced me to sit in the tiled hall by the side door with a greyhound on a 12ft leash.Read full post »

FEBRUARY 24, 2010 11:05PM

Bob Marshall is a little BM

Nature has taken it’s vengeance on my children. Bob Marshall pronounced last Monday that the number of children born subsequent to a first abortion with handicaps has increased dramatically. According to Mr. Marshall - a great scholar of the Old Testament - this is because the first born of allRead full post »

Editor’s Pick
FEBRUARY 11, 2010 3:55PM

Seduced by Chocolate and Chili

Nana loved to cook. Being British, and of a certain age, a good roast dinner was a meat and 3 veg. Don’t ask what veg because I couldn’t tell you! I loved her dearly but it‘s hard to identify something that can be served with an ice-cream scoop. With roughage likeRead full post »

FEBRUARY 9, 2010 1:28PM

Slapping gets you detention

 My daughter found out that if you slap someone across the face it will get you detention. In this world of long names for obvious punishments it's called ISS in her middle school. I have no idea what that stands for and really don't give a shit.  This kid had been… Read full post »

JANUARY 31, 2010 6:37PM

Obsession

I don't understand obsession. I've never called anyone on the phone time after time until they pick up - only to slam it down as soon as I hear their voice. Never created a shrine of photographs of my beloved to gaze upon or even driven by a boys house in theRead full post »