There was a time when the word cancer was whispered. Woman would gather in the kitchen over coffee and a cake that one had brought and discuss the news of the week. Greta was visiting relatives in Great Neck. Nancy was going to a resort in the Adirondacks with the children and Bob would go up on weekends. Did you hear? ........ Lori's mother has ...... Cancer.

The very word Cancer, with a capital "c", would have the weight of a anvil but would always be said in hushed tones. In recent years that has no longer been the case. We discuss it openly. Prevention, treatments, cures and even living in remission for years. Cancer is no longer a word that is whispered.

In 2006 Farah Fawcett was diagnosed with anal cancer, and in 2007 became the face of a potentially stigmatizing condition that can be the result of infection with the human papilloma virus (HPV), a sexually transmitted infection. I was impressed that she could be so open about discussing cancer that can often be linked to promiscuity but also to a part of the body that is very private. She was able to educate so many people about the prevalence of HPV and in an article about Farrah there was a quote that I loved.

When it comes to anal cancer the reality is that the word anal isn't really a word that gets whispered either. We talk about being anal, people being assholes, getting your thumb out of your ass, stick it up your ass, buttholes, anal leakage....I think I have made my point. I don't want cancer on my anus, but then who does, but saying anus isn't too hard.

Instead I got cancer on my vagina. On my vulva to be exact. Vulvar cancer. All of a sudden I am back to whispering. I'm that woman sitting at the kitchen table clutching a cup of coffee - wishing for cake because no one brought one - and whispering vagina. When did I suddenly become so reticent about saying vagina out loud? Why does no one but me know where the Vulva is? No - it is not that boxy but safe car on the driveway outside! When my children were little we taught them all the proper names. Penis and vagina, not pee-pee or ho-ha. Frankly it just never came up in public so it wasn't an issue, but if it had we would have been proud to talk penis and vagina! We were proud to talk about clavicle and patella so as far as I am concerned it was right on the same level.

There are similarities between Vulvar and Anal cancer - in 1/3 to 1/2 of cases of Vulvar cancer in younger women HPV appears to play an important role. Both remain fairly rare with about 4000 cases of vulvar cancer diagnosed each year. Treatment is invasive and interferes with basic function. There are no 5ks or ribbons for either.

My "Gusband" makes me laugh and reminds me of the most important thing I will get out of this. Vaginal rejuvenation! It is all the rage and I will be able to get the best of the best! Just think - I have discovered a way I don't have to whisper the word vagina and an entire population who will adore discussing my labia. The Housewives of the OC!