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lschmoopie

lschmoopie
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I qualify for AARP....now what? Twitter: @lschmoopie Putting this here for the OS editor.

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JUNE 24, 2010 7:44PM

That's "gay"

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Rewind to a month or so ago when I made a Facebook post expressing an opinion on a tv show I had seen. I left my computer for a couple hours, returned, and found all hell had broken out on my FB page.

An online gamer "friend" ( I like Cafe World, ok?!), let's call her Rita,  had replied to the comment by saying: "That's gay." A friend of mine, who happens to be gay, (real friend, not just a FB gamer friend) had gotten into quite a heated discussion with Rita about the use of the term. As they were verbally swinging at each other I tried to be the voice of reason.

  Rita is a young 20-something girl with a baby and a husband stationed in Afghanistan. She's living on a military base where she didn't want to be--her husband didn't tell her ahead of enlisting. I think because I knew of this circumstance I was probably more patient than I would have been otherwise.  I explained that when you call something gay the way she had, she was implying it wasn't good; thereby equating gay with something not good.  No matter how diplomatic I was in trying to get her to see that the word carries power when used in a derogatory way, she just couldn't see why my friend had taken such strong offense to it.

 At the end of it all--some 90 minutes later-- the best I could get out of her was that she MIGHT think about it before using it again. I held out a glimmer of hope that the 90 minute conversation might reverberate in her brain a bit. Until a few weeks ago. While perusing my Facebook wall page there it was again. " That's gay." And that was my introduction to the "Remove" button on the Facebook Friends page.

 

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Comments

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Thank you! "That's gay" is a phrase that is demeaning towards us. Period.

I wonder if your ex-FB Friend would feel okay with "That's blonde/brunette/white/black/asian/tall/short/fat/thin/whatever applies"?
SBAmy: I tried those arguements with her. Just didn't get it. It's the first time I've ever had a confrontation on this issue and I have to say I was amazed at her ignorance.
Welcome to my world. It gets REALLY old after a while... :~S
Thanks for this also. The community always appreciates allies.