Damn I miss you, not the you who was now, but the you who could have been if he had trusted and taken my hand. The you that could play beautiful music and sing, the you who could fix anything that was broken, who came in to my home and cleaned… Read full post »

I went to a new group tonight a group that circles the world called The Compassionate Friends; it is for parents, grandparents and siblings of children who have died. I hesitated only because I have buried two children and was not sure if I would scare them, knowing… Read full post »

It has been 7 months since my son, my first born died and I have done all the right things, said all the right things, worked like it was all okay...

But now, now I am at home and I have been hiding, running from the facts, I… Read full post »

School was out Friday, one more year down, one of the hardest years I have lived through in 30 plus years. A year filled with worry and death, a year filled with a show of love I was oblivious too until that moment. A year that I ended up faking… Read full post »

My 16th Anniversary

Sixteen years ago tonight I met my husband to be at our local bar. I was working two jobs at the time just recently removing my verbally abusive first husband completely from my life and working 7 1/2 hours a day at one job and 6 to 8… Read full post »

My first born was late arriving by a few weeks but was happy and heathly.

My second 5 years later were a bit different. Finding out you are having twins once your water breaks is an odd time. What should have been known months before was overlooked by an incompetent doctor.… Read full post »