NOVEMBER 17, 2012 1:07PM

Twinkies & Cockroaches

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Dear Ignorant Christians and Ignorant Non-Christians,

Since we're getting close to a time when talk of the end of days will be dominating our existence, I thought you would both like to know that Armageddon is not an event, but a place at which an event has been prophesied to occur.

It's a valley right next to the Sea of Galilee, located in what is currently Israel. If y'all have been paying attention, you may recall that there is a bit of tension between Israel and Iran currently, centering around Iran's ability to wage nuclear war (a capability that Israel, thanks to the US, has long since had, which apparently is OK, but it's not OK for Iran??? Someone is still gonna have to explain that one to me...).

Is it really so far fetched that something which will at least seem like the end of the world to those in the general area will occur there (and, Armageddon isn't where the end of the world is supposed to occur, either...just the ultimate WWF match between Jesus and "The Beast", which is a name that Vince McMahon would come up with, if there ever was one)?

I don't know, if it should happen, that it will be the result of true prophecy or self-fulfilling prophecy, but it's possible that if it does that it will not signal the end of the world, but instead a new era.

Broadway notwithstanding, THIS is the dawn of the Age of Aquarius, not 1960. If you don't know what an age is, look it up. I don't have time to explain.

Now, y'all need to stop fighting so damn much about that which makes you different and celebrate the things about yourselves that are the same. Why, just look - you're both ignorant. Try to build on that and quit hating each other so damn much. It's what Jesus would do.
Twinkie Trade Center

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Hostess going under isn't a sign that the prophecy is wrong. In fact, just the opposite.
I think that Hostess didn't "go down" but rather "went down below". Figured they's get there before "the end" and stake out their market share territory.

Hell has updated. No more hellfire and brimstone; from now on it's Coca Cola and Twinkies. Once all the poor souls are fattened up so that they can't move, then Hell's own preachers, like Oral Roberts and Pat Robertson, three or four Jims, and all them others getting rich parting US suckers from their money, will lecture them 24/7.


That'll teach them!

They actually tried to work out a deal with their unions that would have given employees a 30% stake in company ownership and a voice on the board of directors such that they would come back to work and the company could weather their tenuous financial position and the employees would reap the rewards of a successful recovery from chapter 11...and the union turned it down because it wasn't immediate money in their pockets.

and, just like the Hostess management told them, if they didn't take the deal, it was the end.

This is actually an example of a corporation doing the right thing for their long term health, as well as the health of their employees, and this time, the employees were the ones who fucked it up.

Thank God everyone is fucking stupid.
"THIS is the dawn of the Age of Aquarius"'s good to have been mentioned.
Yeah...I don't think Ages are important, other than 2000 years seems like the amount of time it takes humans to move from one social mindset to another. The start is always hard, though. Ain't like enlightenment comes immediately.