Everyone who knows me is well aware that I keep a close eye on the latest in research about men and women.
What you may not know is that I also adapt my approaches to women, according to what the latest research tells me. I’m very scientific about seduction.
This week’s research guidance comes from a study by investigators at the University of British Columbia, Canada. In a scholarly article published online in the American Psychological Association journal Emotion, the Canadian researchers discovered that women are not attracted to smiling men.
A number of women reviewed different photos of men. The female study participants were shown photos of men wearing different facial expressions:
- Happy (smiling).
- Proud (with arms raised overhead).
- Ashamed (with eyes downcast).
- Neutral (staring straight ahead, expressionless).
The women were then asked to rate the photos for sexual attractiveness. The study results found that ladies liked the proud and ashamed men most. They liked the happy and neutral men least.
Lead researcher Jessica Tracy told Reuters: "Men who smile were considered fairly unattractive by women. So to the extent that men think that smiling is a good thing to do if they want to be found sexually attractive, our findings suggest that's not the case."
Now, I don’t argue with science. Especially psychological science, no matter how often it contradicts itself. I just do what science tells me.
So I’m working on a new script to use with the ladies, in order to keep my mattress bouncing.
Me:
Hello, my name is Man. I am tortured and brooding, and suffer from feelings of shame.
Woman:
Oooh, tell me more about yourself.
Me:
I am unhappy, but also triumphant, bold and proud.
Woman:
I can hardly stand it! I find you very sexually attractive.
Me:
(smiling) Hey, that’s great! Maybe you and I could…
Woman:
Oh, wait. No, you just lost me there. I don’t think you’re my type after all.
Me:
It figures. Life is all about pain and disappointment. I’m going back to my dark apartment, drink a bottle of something, and think unpleasant thoughts about people who are lesser than I.
Woman:
Take me with you! I must have you now!
[Later, at my place]
Woman:
I really enjoyed having sex with you, Man.
Me:
Of course you did. I am simply titanic in every way. But my conquest of you does not please me. I remain unhappy. Leave me now. I must brood.
Woman:
I’ll be back tomorrow, you irresistible hunk of manhood.
Me:
I’ll look forward to it! Uh, I mean… I will anticipate your return with a sense of foreboding. At the appointed time, I will perform my duty in elevating you to ecstasy. But I won’t enjoy it.
Woman:
That’s it, I’m moving in!
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Comments
Can't show my teeth? That's not fair. I have such nice teeth.
Oryoki: Beer and football are excellent things, but they can't compare to intimacy with a woman. The proper sequence is:
1. Play football with woman.
2. Drink beer with woman.
3. Sin with woman.
And smile throughout each activity.
bobbot: Maybe you need to move to British Columbia? ;)
Snarky: Stop dating brooding men! They suck the life out of you. I don't know... maybe that's why so many women seem to get hot over vampires?
And what about this? When women are attracted to me and have sex with me, it makes me very, very happy. And ebullient! Is that going to drive them away?
A brooding man in India - that looks proud and absorbed or depressed would attarct the "boudis" - the married women that are looking for easy prey - married but dont get enough sex types , you know? Your posts alwasy make me laugh. R~
Ben Sen: "Brain Sex" got it. I'll look for it on Amazon. Sounds interesting.
Then you said: " i don't think u get who i am yet." Well... that's probably true. Will it blow my mind when I find out? In a good way or a bad way?
Rolling: Thanks for the kind words - and even more for the good advice about Indian women! Next time I'm in Bangalore, I'll be ready to brood and pout them right into my arms. ;)
I love picking up farmer and taking then with a six pack and fat abs for a joyride.
It's joy. Go for a night cruise in a bumpy Open PU. What fun to ride over groundhog holes.
Maybe She hop in truck?
I like your hat, by the way. I wish more women would wear hats. I think they look nice.
(sigh)
you like me
i like you
if we are going to do this
let us both together
put up a large sum
(a tontine)
tr ig: Naw, your success is due to your being a wild man who women feel is dangerous... but not to them. I'd call that a sweet spot.
Chicken Man: Are roosters' smiles as rare as hens' teeth?
I knew this guy who went to Cocoa beach and scored like crazy with married babes because they were all dying inside. But most married women are not willing to risk that sort of honest statement on their lives.
As for smiling or not smiling...depends on the guy, the situation...and the country, apparently.
I know of no way to be more wrong, more of the time, than to make such a generalization about the (sometimes) fair sex. To make it within the actual hearing of a woman is even more ill advised. And can be painful......
;-)
.
`
Thoth wrote.
He seek forgiveness?
Thoth ask who?
Ophra Winfrey?
Thoth write too?
Oy Memoir Oops?
Troth?
Ya a Manhattanite?
B'lore is diff.
there is nothing sexier than a man who doesnt take himself too seriously. if i wanted broody angsty types i would sleep with poets... which i dont do.... errr anymore.
Mary, quite so. "Proud and pouty"... well, it's certainly not my own style. I tend more toward the "pompous and playful". Or "irritating and irrepressible". Or maybe "affable a-hole." And, certainly, "seductively stupid".
The equation also works in reverse: the childlike, virginal young woman needs a big strong man to take care of her: hence the intense appeal to certain types of (generally, immature) men.
M. Chariot, that's an astute and concise summation. With respect to the "childlike, virginal" woman and the "big, strong man"... that kind of pairing is fairly common in certain business circles, with both first and second wives.
From a male perspective, I find that pretty much incomprehensible. I like a girl who knows some things I don't. And if she's also got a bit of a "history"? Well, I won't chide her for being like me. My hypocrisy only extends so far.