Photo from University of British Columbia, via CBC News
Everyone who knows me is well aware that I keep a close eye on the latest in research about men and women.
What you may not know is that I also adapt my approaches to women, according to what the latest research tells me. I’m very scientific about seduction.
This week’s research guidance comes from a study by investigators at the University of British Columbia, Canada. In a scholarly article published online in the American Psychological Association journal Emotion, the Canadian researchers discovered that women are not attracted to smiling men.
A number of women reviewed different photos of men. The female study participants were shown photos of men wearing different facial expressions:
- Happy (smiling).
- Proud (with arms raised overhead).
- Ashamed (with eyes downcast).
- Neutral (staring straight ahead, expressionless).
The women were then asked to rate the photos for sexual attractiveness. The study results found that ladies liked the proud and ashamed men most. They liked the happy and neutral men least.
Lead researcher Jessica Tracy told Reuters: "Men who smile were considered fairly unattractive by women. So to the extent that men think that smiling is a good thing to do if they want to be found sexually attractive, our findings suggest that's not the case."
Now, I don’t argue with science. Especially psychological science, no matter how often it contradicts itself. I just do what science tells me.
So I’m working on a new script to use with the ladies, in order to keep my mattress bouncing.
Hello, my name is Man. I am tortured and brooding, and suffer from feelings of shame.
Oooh, tell me more about yourself.
I am unhappy, but also triumphant, bold and proud.
I can hardly stand it! I find you very sexually attractive.
(smiling) Hey, that’s great! Maybe you and I could…Woman:
Oh, wait. No, you just lost me there. I don’t think you’re my type after all.
It figures. Life is all about pain and disappointment. I’m going back to my dark apartment, drink a bottle of something, and think unpleasant thoughts about people who are lesser than I.
Take me with you! I must have you now!
[Later, at my place]
I really enjoyed having sex with you, Man.
Of course you did. I am simply titanic in every way. But my conquest of you does not please me. I remain unhappy. Leave me now. I must brood.
I’ll be back tomorrow, you irresistible hunk of manhood.
I’ll look forward to it! Uh, I mean… I will anticipate your return with a sense of foreboding. At the appointed time, I will perform my duty in elevating you to ecstasy. But I won’t enjoy it.
That’s it, I’m moving in!
Now saying odd things on Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/ManTalkNow