YOU HAD ME AT "HA"!
- los angeles, California,
- July 03
- Marilyn Sands is a Former 80's Stand-up Comic, her Essays can be found on salon.com & her unsold Screenplays in her Top Drawer...next to the hard liquor!
"Author of 2 Works of Fiction....my Diary & my Resume"! ha ha
All my Articles are Copyrighted & yes, I'll know!
MY RECENT POSTS
- "CAN WE TALK"? Selling Jokes
To JOAN RIVERS!
September 06, 2014 12:42AM
- "My Digs: The Yin & Yang to
Gerald's Work Space"! Satired
August 28, 2014 06:55PM
- "HUNG UP ON JUNG & FREUDIAN
August 18, 2014 02:05PM
- "ROBIN WILLIAMS - Seeing
Double"! Roger Kabler Shines!
August 16, 2014 03:59PM
- "OS Writing Table ROUNDER Than
August 14, 2014 03:07PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “New York, New York -
it's a wonderful town! Nice
- “I like your analogy! It
doesn't work with Checkers,
September 13, 2014 02:37PM
- “R.E.S.P.E.C.T. You got
mine 100%! "Brave" doesn't
September 13, 2014 02:31PM
- “Thanks so much Dan! From
your mouth to Mel Brooks'
Actually, right now
September 12, 2014 03:21PM
- “Didn't Bush paint Cheney
too? Oh, no that's a
Dan - I th…”
September 12, 2014 02:26PM
Marilyn Sands's Links
- Just like GORE - it may not Win but it surely got the POPULAR VOTE!
- TOP TEN THINGS...
- MARILYN monroe, Inc.
- STONE AGE vs TODAY
- 2016 1st WOMAN PRESIDENT!
- "PET RUN With HAPPY HOUR"!
- OPEN AT YOUR OWN RISK!
- VALENTINE'S DAY
- ST. PATRICK'S DAY
- BOOK REVIEWS
- EP or BUST! ha ha
- OPEN SALON Uncensored
- OLDIE BUT GOODIE
- Ima FLY ON THE WALL
- HUMP DAY...Office Shananigans
- ...HAPPILY EVER AFTER
- IN FICTION...THERE'S ALWAYS NEW BEGINNINGS!
- MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC!
- BEING A STAND-UP COMIC After 40
- MY FAVORITE LINE in an Article
- END OF YEAR SPECIAL
- DON KNOTTS DAUGHTER: "Tied Up In Knotts"
- NEWTOWN, CONNECTICUT SCHOOL SHOOTING, COLORADO ET AL
- "FAVORITE SCENE IN A MOVIE
- PILLOW TALK - Scripted
- THE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES 2012
- THE MATING GAME
- NOBODY HERE BUT US CHICKENS
- BO OBAMA
- OS WEEKEND FICTION
- THE ELUSIVE EP
- JOHN BOEHNER
- MITT ROMNEY
- NEWT GINGRICH
- RICK PERRY
- CALIFORNIA DREAMIN'
- YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP - On Line DATING STRAIGHT LINES Copyright 2012
- RECOMMENDED BY ZAGAT
- POLITICS AS USUAL
- THINKING OUT OF THE BOX
- NON-PARTISAN POLITICS ha ha
- SARAH PALIN
- MICHELE BACHMANN
- WHAT WAS I THINKING?
- IN A CLASS ALL IT'S OWN
- RICK SANTORUM
- VENTS R US
- I LOVE THE MOVIES
- PERSONAL FAVS
- VISUAL CANDY
- BATHROOM READING
- Shh...IT'S PERSONAL!
- ARNOLD SCHWARTENEGGER
- ANTHONY WEINER
- CHARLIE SHEEN
- NO COMEDY ZONE
In 1983, while living in Hawaii for 3 years - my life changed profoundly.
In those days, it was Snail Mail - not emails, Text's or Fax' - when I bravely sent out batches of Jokes to one of the Top Female Comics in the country.
The wait to hear back was fraught… Read full post »
Third Pillow to the left is where I sat with my laptop churning out "On The s.O.S Lifeboat Left to Play with our DINGY'S"!
This is where I wrote "VIBRATORS...You don't have to Cook them Breakfast"!
This is where my Wednesday Writer's Group sit… Read full post »
I don't know about you but - the last time I wore a Slip I was at the "Cat On A Hot Tin Roof" Revival. It was a lot like "The Rocky Horror Show" turnouts where everybody dressed up & 1/2 Slips were Welcome!
Well, it's not that kind of… Read full post »
No Comedy Zone
There's no greater compliment than to have someone do you - I mean an Impression of you & then you know - you've made it!
In the 1990's at "The Comedy Store" in L.A., I saw Roger Kabler do lots of Impressions on stage; but the one… Read full post »
We Scribes love the idea of a Salon - bringing aesthetic thoughts of the literati of Paris, Italy & the legendary 1920's NYC Algonquin Round Table...well, it's nothing like that!
For one, we sit around in our Pajamas & Boxers like every other red… Read full post »
Don't worry - it's not gonna happen!
Oh, there's nothing wrong with Jews or Israeli's; I broke bread with many of them. Well, with my Cooking; it's inevitable! But Plates too?
As you may know, I've been on a few Dating Sites & get regular visits on my Profile Pic from… Read full post »
And I don't mean "Merde" & "Screwè Vous"!
To be honest, the only thing I remember about my High School French is "Voulez vous coucher avec moi" - but enough about me & my 12 Step!
Okay, now it's all coming back:
A Menage a trois - means you'll… Read full post »
It's no news to Israeli's that when wars start - Tourism suffers & so it goes...
An old married couple...their Falafel Stand in Tel Aviv
Satirized, of course...
I m… Read full post »
Everybody knows "The Park Bench" is the quintessential Box Seat of this amoral pastime; but that's so bourgeois, isn't it? It's like the Missionary Position for Sex being the only one that will do the trick.
A way to get out of your he/… Read full post »
CLARK KENT did it...so did SUPERWOMAN, Hillary Clinton do it! She did it many times becoming not just a President's Wife, but a Senator & Secretary of State...and she didn't even have to take Shorthand or make Cookies!
To me - "Identity Theft" is not… Read full post »
Comic: Where you from?
Heckler: New Jersey.
Comic: What Exit?
4 Young Men from the wrong side of the tracks in New Jersey come together to form the iconic 1960's Rock Group "The Four Seasons"
I didn't see the Tony Award Hit Broadway Show; but almost did with the Tourin… Read full post »
10. "I THINK I'LL TAKE THE BENZ TODAY"!
9. "I HATE PIZZA"!
8. "AND, IT WAS MY FIRST LOTTO TICKET"!
7. "I'LL TAKE 3 SCOOPS"!
6. MEL BROOKS & I....!
5. WITH GREAT WEALTH COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY"!
4. "NO, MY HAIR WON'T FRIZZ-UP… Read full post »
In keeping with my sleepover trips to Movie Locations - I too, stayed at "The Del" - that's the gorgeous Victorian seaside Hotel Del Coronado in San Diego where "Some Like It Hot" was filmed.
This time only for 1 Night for financial reasons. It's all in the Affadavid… Read full post »
Favorite Scene in a Movie #10
In 1980, I was so captivated by this Romantic Movie starring Christopher Reeve & Jane Seymour - that in the 90's - I had to stay at "The Grand Hotel" on Mackinac Island where it was filmed!
Don't get me wrong - I also liked… Read full post »
I'm all for Solutions - and here we OpenSaloners have an opportunity not to just experience the wonders of New Jersey - but to kill 2 Birds with 1 Stone...Gerald Andersen & any one of the Birds in his Feeder!
Is he laughing?
The Beauty Part would be - we'd be on… Read full post »
And I thought having a little Home Game of Texas Hold 'em in the Basement was illegal!
I don't know if your Hamlet, Town, City, State, Country has "Meet-Up Groups" from the Internet; but L.A. sure has 'em & they are as kookie as they come!
Launched in 2002; there are… Read full post »
That's right; I've decided to take Monica Lewinsky out of her misery & have my way with this President!
I'll knock Monica off the Front Pages of Newspapers, Gossip Rags, Internet, Twitter & Comedian's Lips!
You see, I'm just like that "1st Gentleman-In-Waiting" who once said, "I feel your Pai… Read full post »
You see, I had to save this - it's a moment in time that can never be relived - well...except if squirreled away to read & reread when needing a smile & a lift I can't get from any Pill I know!
And so I kept this reminder that I was young… Read full post »
What the heck does "Dynamite in the Sack" mean?
I hear that phrase bandied about & I'm wondering if I am or how many copies of "Cosmo" do I have to buy to get it!
Since I'm only guessing - here's my TOP TEN Uni-List, you know...could be a Man… Read full post »
Ocean City, Maryland
In our late, late teens, one of my best pals, Ginny and I got the bright idea to drive from D.C. down to Ocean City for the 4th of July Weekend with no Room Reservations.
Surprise, surprise - we couldn't find 1 Room in a Hotel… Read full post »
So yesterday - I drove a mile & a half to my Free Secret Parking Spot & then walked to the Beach & the first thing I saw was a guy holding a Sign:
"$1 TO SLAP MY FACE"!
...I had to write this article!
You see - all your… Read full post »
This delicious 1971 Coming of Age Blockbuster is based on the nostalgic Memoirs of Screenwriter Herman Raucher that can still arouse the yearnings of romance of a warm summer's day - whether it be 1942 or 2014.
It stars radiant Jennifer O'Neill as Dorothy & gifted Gary Grimes as Her… Read full post »
It came to me that there's a big divide between what WE have to keep in our noggins & what The Neanderthals had to keep in theirs!
TODAY - when we are born, we are slapped with a SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER - then we have to memorize it until the… Read full post »
In yesterday's L.A. Times "Dear Amy" Advice Column...(you know it used to be Dear Abby) this letter & response got me thinking about what most women AND men think of how the proliferation of available Pornography effects male's perception of females & how they should be treated.
"SON'S PORN D… Read full post »