"Get that freakin' baby off or give him a Beer"!
Yeah, that came out of the mouth of one of the MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANTS! Just one on my list of "FUNNY AS A ROCK...your JOB on The Laughter Scale" vocations.
If your Profession were rated... would it repress or reveal a Sense of Humor? It's not if the Job is funny or not - it's whether you can laugh or Whistle while you work! You'd be surprised at the list...that's right - not a whit!
Check to see if you're on the List - if you're not; you can thank your Guidance Counselor. Mine said "Sex Sells" & the rest is in The Affadavid! ha ha
"FUNNY AS A ROCK...your JOB on The Laughter Scale"
Everyone knows the obvious ones; FUNERAL DIRECTORS, DENTISTS & SEXOLOGISTS who attempt to joke around - like Kinsey, Dr. Ruth, Masters & Johnson...well, okay...Johnson did!
PLASTIC SURGEONS - Absolutely not! One Ex said, "When he came home he said, "I don't want to see another Breast - not even on a Chicken"!
BEEKEEPERS - Are you kidding; they wouldn't dare - every Bee is a Potential Heckler!
OB/GYNS - Oh they try; but no Cigar: one said, "There's no way a Diaphragm can get lost in your body - Keys & Umbrellas yes; but not Diaphragms"!
JOCKEYS - Talk about being down-wind too long - One Mini-Me said "My girlfriend has ankles like "Seabiscuit"!
PIZZA DELIVERYMEN - Do you mean when they ask "Do you want Napkins"? No, that's what Bathrobes are for!
SWORD SWALLOWERS - Not only can't they laugh while working - their Mothers won't speak to them because of their choice!
POLITITIANS - You mean like calling "The Kettle Black" in Congress when one yelled, "You Lie"!
HYPNOTISTS - If they allowed themselves to laugh; they could actually give "The Hypno-tee" a funnier Personality!
GARBAGE COLLECTORS - I don't think so. One said, "I like to wake people up at 5 AM & forget to take their garbage"!
CAR SALESMEN - This one guy didn't Undercoat it or Sugarcoat it - In Prison; he sold Memberships for the Health Club in the Exercise Room!
PALM READERS - Yeah, like the one that Channeled "Karma Miranda" when she said "Reincarnation"? I just know I'd come back as a Can of Milk!
PHILOSOPHERS - Those killjoys can empty a room faster than "The Soup Nazi" on Seinfeld, yelling "No soup for you"!
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS - No, but they're Practical Jokers! "Who do you think put a Chocolate Smudge on Bob's Monitor Screen? hee hee"
ACCOUNTANTS - They're really Closet Comedians; but while they're in there - they count all the shirts & color-coordinate them!
ROCKET SCIENTISTS - Well, there really aren't any - since no one ever owns up to it!
And just when I thought I scraped the bottom of the Barrel - Eureka! I found..."THE GOOD HUMOR MAN"! Oh, I'm sorry about that...he only sells Ice Cream!
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V.Corso
OS Weekend Fiction Club
Thoth
Blinddream
Procopius
Rob St. Amant
Salon.com
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