I don't care what anybody says; yesterday should've been a Day Off!
If only for the Chocolate Hangover & the Chores - you know...getting my Garter Belt off the Ceiling Fan!
But now that all the Flowers, Candy & Naughty Undies have been delivered; it's time to focus on the next 374 Date Days!
Have you noticed that "Love" seems cheapened all because finding a Soul Mate is so desirable; yet out of reach?
No, I don't believe much in "Soul Mates" - in fact; when I hear the phrase; I want to put Speed Bumps in the "Tunnel of Love" over at Disney!
You've heard them:
"We finish each other's sentences"!
What is it - a Ventriloquist's Act?
"My dog loved him even before I did"!
Give me a break; your dog humped the Umbrella Stand!
"It was "Love at 1st Sight"!
You sure it wasn't at O'Brien's "Last Call"?
"We had the same Fortune Cookie Message - at the same meal!
What are the odds "The Chinese" had a "Writer's Strike"!
"We communicate without words"!
If I want a Psychic; I'll go to "Gypsy's R Us"!
"We have the same Tattoo: "An Eagle carrying a Swastika"!
And they said Eva Braun was an Enabler!
"We forgot how we met or how we became close"!
It wouldn't have anything to do with "Belly Shots" - would it?
"I'm able to think clearly for the 1st time in my life"!
Could it be Starbucks 31 oz "Trenta"?
"We're both Republicans"!
You live on the edge, don't you?
And..."We wore the same dress on the 1st Date"!
If I were you - I wouldn't ask or tell anybody!