What's so wrong in trying to hook-up my "Spell Check Gal" & my "GPS Guy"? The way my Therapist's carrying on; you'd think I wanted to date him!
Mix Species? Are you kidding? I never Cross-Pollinate or even rent other people's Bowling Shoes!
Besides; I want Dinner & Dancing - not sittin' in a car pointing out....Exits & Detours! Okay; maybe a little Golf once in a while!
Wikipedia describes a Spell Checker's job as "Scanning a set of routines & extracting words and language-dependent algorithms for handling morphology - and she makes a heck of a Chicken Salad Sandwich too!
Give me a break - I fell asleep twice reading that thing! No wonder no one live wants the job!
It always amazes me that most people don't know that when you buy a new Computer; you can pick what type of "Spell Check Gal" you want!
But you'd be surprised at "The Personality Clashes" of the Owners & the Checkers; between "The Lost Cause" Sighs & "The After-Work-Drink Blow-offs"....
it's no wonder your Screen freezes when you say "WTF"!
The only solution is don't press "SPELL CHECK" & she won't come out - if not called!
But if you happen to get off on that crap; go back on & make up words - knock yourself out!
But whatever you do Guys; don't ask the Gals to "Word Count" - they say it's boring, beneath them & besides - some of them can't even swallow Pills!
As for my Matchmaking skills; I still think those two are perfect for each other:
Just by being one of those "Laptops"; my Gal is pretty spoiled & gets carried every place - like Cleopatra!
Now, if all goes well with this GPS guy; she'll never have to walk again!
And the biggest plus is they're both "Nudges"; she won't have to say twice "Pick up your freakin' underwear off the floor"! "Hey.. and the socks"!
And he can tell her exactly where to go find everything at the Grocery Store:
"Make a left at Prunes, a right on All-Bran, a U-turn at Granola, go straight until you hit the Butcher scratching himself & grab a Kielbasa!
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V.Corso
OS Weekend Fiction Club
Thoth
Blinddream
Procopius
Rob St. Amant
Salon.com
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