#2
It's hard being single at this age - Romance just doesn't turn out like in the Movies! Case in point; my last date - maybe I shouldn't have just eaten that Tuna Sandwich!
And On-Line Dating is the worst - it's one step away from an Arranged Marriage & you know how painful that is - look at Adam & Eve!
But today; you get to read the Actual Profiles they've written right after they've burped & scratched themselves:
"I want a Blue eyed Blonde, born in January under the Capricorn Sign".
Then you wouldn't like me; brown eyes, grey roots, born in July under an "Air Conditioning" Sign!
"Can you pee outdoors"?
If that's your Dealbreaker; maybe "Smoky The Bear" can hook you up!
"I have the Potential to be a fun loving person".
Well, when you get close - call me!
"I like to Blindfold my partner & use a Feather".
There's no Duct Tape involved; is there - I'm allergic!
"A fair number of people seem to like me".
When you get to double digits; call your Mother!
"I turn off the Football Game when I have sex".
Then what will we do for the other 23 hours & 59 minutes?
"I can turn Water into Wine".
And I can guess your Weight & IQ!
"Reasonably rich & will be quite a bit richer if I outlive my 92 year old Mother".
We wouldn't be a good match - I keep my money under the mattress & sleep with the light on!
And...."Sorry for not smiling in my Pics; but I can't due to Dental work"!
Sorry for not writing back; but my Breasts are at the Cleaners!
If you want the Complete Set & want to be further amused by my pathetic, parodied Single life; Check out the Series!
love@60.lol #1
love@60.lol #2 "Date-abase Shuffle"
"YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP"! On-Line "Straight Lines" #1, #2 & #3
And don't forget "CUPID with 19-19 Vision" posted on January 16, 2010
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V.Corso
OS Weekend Fiction Club
Thoth
Blinddream
Procopius
Rob St. Amant
Salon.com
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