YOU HAD ME AT "HA"!
from HOPE to HARPO - my love affair with funny!
Marilyn Sands
- Location
- marina del rey, California, usa
- Birthday
- July 03
- Bio
- Former Stand-up Comic, Comic Booker, Gag Writer. Currently marketing Madcap Comedy Screenplays & selling jokes out of the trunk of my car......"Author of 2 Works of Fiction....my Diary & my Resume"! ha ha
MY RECENT POSTS
- "THEY SHOOT HORSES, DON'T
THEY"? Dancing With The
Stars...
May 25, 2012 02:08PM - "POT SPILL"...Fish Flounder
just for The Halibut!
May 22, 2012 02:23PM - "VIBRATORS" - You Don't Have
To Cook Them Breakfast!
May 18, 2012 11:37AM - "OUR 1ST GAY PRESIDENT" Stole
My 1980's Jokes! **
May 17, 2012 03:16PM - BULLY BOYS..."S'NOT What You
Think"! (Open Call)
May 17, 2012 11:02AM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “As Mae would've said ,
"A good Tan is hard to find"!
R”
10:31PM - “Images never to be
forgotten - loving tribute
Ande! R”
May 28, 2012 01:24PM - “Thanks so much Fay! But
I have to warn you - Watching
it
faithfully is truly
a…”
May 28, 2012 11:44AM - “I always hoped there'd
be a movie like "Good Hair"
& so
there
was.…”
May 27, 2012 11:01PM - “A well-executed Vent!
R”
May 27, 2012 07:30PM
Marilyn Sands's Links
- THE ELUSIVE EP
- "OS CHARWOMAN BUSTED"! EP Whistle Blower Also Cuffed!
- IN A CLASS ALL IT'S OWN!
- "GEORGE CARLIN'S DAUGHTER KELLY...Hot *STUFF"!
- RICK SANTORUM
- "TOP 10 REASONS WHY SANTORUM SAYS HE DOESN'T USE CONDOMS"!
- "TEACHING SANTORUM HOW TO PUT ON A CONDOM"
- MITT ROMNEY
- ZANY? "MITT'S Fighting WORDPLAY"!
- "WHEN THE Latter-Day SAINTS GO MARCHIN' IN"
- JOHN BOEHNER
- "STATE OF THE ONION" ..No Tears For BOEHNER!
- OBAMA HITS HIS FUNNY BOEHNER" Libs Demand Xrays!
- NEWT GINGRICH
- "NEWT'S Political PAJAMA GAME"! Scripted
- "CRAZY" Newt's Campaign Sing-a-Long!
- "Don't you HAVE TO BE CRAZY To Run For President"?
- "What Are Americans To Do"? VOTE or BOOK 2 SEATS TO THE MOON?
- "STOPPING NEWT FROM CARRYING ON"! Too much BAGGAGE?
- Gingrich Productions Presents "THE OTHER, OTHER WOMAN"
- "YOU GOT TO PICK-A-POCKET OR TWO" The Fagin/Newt Connection
- RICK PERRY
- "THE BOIL ON RICK PERRY'S BUTT"!
- "Gunslinger PERRY DRAWS A BLANK"!
- "PILLOW TALK @ THE PERRY'S" After-Debate Foreplay
- CALIFORNIA DREAMIN'
- "BABE IN THE Hollywood WOODS"!
- "STARSTRUCK @ STARBUCKS"!
- "BUTT ENVY"..Smokers Pack It In!
- "JURY RIGGED"! L.A. Jury Duty..Peer 1
- "L.A. LAUGH LINES @ THE DMV"!
- "ARMAGEDDON & Other PET PEEVES On The Road"!
- "VENTS R US"
- "EVERYBODY WANTS TO GET IN TO DE ACT"! Repost
- "WHY I'M QUITTING HOTELS WITH "TURN DOWN" SERVICE!
- "TOP 10 THINGS I LEARNED SINCE WRITING ON OPEN SALON"!
- "WHILE WAITING TO GET ON OPEN SALON - I WROTE..."
- "FLIGHT RAGE..Having a bad AIR day"!
- "LIVING ON A SHOESTRING...without tying one on"!
- I LOVE THE MOVIES!
- "RACING WITH THE MOON" Hot Topic...Back Alley Abortions!
- "THE ARTIST" Draws Pathos! 2012 OSCAR WINNER!
- "FAVORITE SCENE IN A MOVIE" #5 WOODY ALLEN'S 1972 Sex Romp
- "MONEYBALL'S" Stephen Bishop "A NATURAL"!
- Favorite Scene In A Movie" #4 Neil Simon's "BILOXI BLUES"!
- Favorite Scene In a Movie # 3 "HONEYMOON IN VEGAS"
- FAVORITE SCENE IN A MOVIE #2 "Paper Moon"!
- FAVORITE SCENE IN A MOVIE #1 "Terms of Endearment"
- "SOYLENT GREEN" Eating Aunt Louise!
- "CELL Phone CHECK" Silent Movies!
- "ZELIG" meets "WHERE'S WALDO" Woody's Latest!
- RICKY GERVAIS - "CRRRINGE HUMOR"!
- "MATINEE$" Afternoon Delights!
- "DATE MOVIES ARE THE PITS"!
- PERSONAL FAVS
- "STARSTRUCK @ STARBUCKS"!
- "WHY I'M FIGHTING FOR OBAMA'S REDEMPTION"!
- "In The NICK Of Time "SANTA WEARS HOLIDAY BLUES"! Scripted (O.C.)
- "CHILEAN MINER MAJOR HIT"! Down & Out in N.Y.C.!
- "THE HIPPY DIPPY WEATHERMAN Returns with IRENE"!
- "WEINER'S DREAM" Stand-up Comedy..Down Mexico Way!
- "PINOCCHIO & WEINER...The Nose Knows"! Scripted
- INAGURATION DAY QUIPS.."OBAMA'S 4 Year SPRINT"!
- "CASABLANCA" on Pennsylvania Avenue...Scripted!
- "SEASON OF DISSENT"...SaTIRED!
- "CANADIAN BAKIN'...It doesn't sizzle, it THAWS"!
- "RATS"...THE MUSICAL On Broadway!
- "BEAR LEFT" Is Not A DIRECTION" It's A WARNING!
- "CHEMISTRY 101...lol Adam & Eve!
- "MIDSUMMER KNIGHT'S DREAM" WILL & KATE'S 4Play!
- "GET READY FOR THE AUGUST 2ND $$MAGEDDON"!
- VISUAL CANDY
- "UNDER THE WIRE" New Year's "HAPPY" List!
- "HEIR TO THE WHITE HOUSE" Crowning Glory Daze
- "My Critics Were Right: A MONKEY COULD WRITE THIS CRAP"!
- "D.C. EARTHQUAKE" Obama's FAULT Again!
- "MATCH THE TEA With THE TEA BAGGER"!
- HELP WANTED: SKY WRITER "MUST LOVEsmallWORDS"!
- "CASEY ANTHONY IS PREGNANT"!
- "IF ONLY...LADY GAGA would show less of her GEEGAW"!
- "IF ONLY...ERIC CANTOR would "Pull a Weiner"!
- BATHROOM READING
- "THE TRUTH ABOUT SANTA" T'was GAS!
- "SALMONELLA 101" It's Funny NOW!
- "MOMISMS" & Teenage Angst!
- "OPEN SALON'S Only Techie Found on "LOST"!
- "BETTER THAN SEX"!
- "T.W.I.T.T.E.R. POP CULTURE CODES"!
- "BO OBAMA TURNS 2"
- "DATING DOGGIE STYLE"
- "BRIDE BLOWS OFF HEF - NO HARD FEELINGS"!
- "How Many Friends Does A LACTOSE INTOLERANT REALLY Have"?
- FOR YOUR EYES ONLY
- "BIRTHIN' BABIES"! Pre-Existing Condition? (Open Call)
- "CARRIE/EDDIE Fisher & ME"! 6 Degrees of Separation!
- "I SOLD CIGARETTES @ 14"! Little Match Girl!
- "TAKE MY ACT...PLEASE"! Salon after Dark!
- "HOW I GOT A JOB IN THE GOVERNMENT" Terror on the High Keys!
- "ONE NIGHT WITH MARILYN"!
- "THE SITUATION ROOM with Marilyn Sands"!
- "DUE DATE DRAMA" Birthin' Babies!
- "DIAHANN CARROLL - A Regal White Vision"!
- "THE LADY IS A TRAMP" In Deutschland
- "RITA HAYWORTH & ME"! The Heat Is On"!
- "EXTRAS, EXTRAS" Read All About It!
- "Taking it on the Chin - SUGAR RAY LEONARD vs ME"!
- "I MARRIED AN OXYMORON"!
- "Diary of a POKER WIDOW"
- "HIGH ANXIETY" Flying over a lifetime of Gargles!
- "BOOKS DON'T NEED A WARRANTY"! Fighting the Digital Age
- "IF CLEANLINESS IS NEXT TO GODLINESS - I'm Screwed"!
- Shh...WELCOME TO MY WORLD
- "YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP" On-Line Straight Lines! #4
- "YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP" On-Line Straight Lines! #3
- "LOVE ME, LOVE MY PUSSY"!
- "YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP"! On-Line Straight Lines! #1
- "YOU CAN'T MAKE THESE THINGS UP"! On-Line Straight Lines! #2
- love@60.lol #1
- love@60.lol Date-abase Shuffle
- "CUPID with 19-19 VISION"!
- "SOUL MATES"...Ad Nauseam!
- "HOT DAMN - NOW I CAN MARRY A WOMAN"!
- "THE SKY IS FALLING & SO AM I...For Larry David"!
- Recommended by ZAGAT
- "PETITS four CRIMES" Getting My Just Deserts! Open Call
- "LOOKING FOR MR. GOODMENSCH"!
- "HOW MUCH FOR 1 CUCUMBER"? Foraging For Innuendos @ the A&P!
- "VELVEETA" - A Love Story!
- "Kosher PICKLE & Non-denominational OLIVE"!
- "WURST You were Here"!
- MY STOMACH IS SAYING: "Change Religions"!
- "COFFEE BAGGERS" BUZZ To-Go!
- POLITICS AS USUAL
- "THE CARTAGENA FOLLIES" White House Pillow Talk!
- "Devil's Advocate in THE ALOHA STATE of Confusion"!
- "IF YOU KNEW BIBI, LIKE I KNOW BIBI" Republicans Fighting For Israel"!
- "WE MIGHT AS WELL THROW DARTS" How We Pick Our President!
- "Bedroom ChiCAINery"! SEX, LIES & PIES!
- "Auntie Em: O'REILLY HAS A HEART"!
- "BUSH'S MEMOIR...or "Mission Sketchy"!
- "MR. STEWART GOES TO WASHINGTON!
- "AIR FORCE 1 TO CHICAGO...1 Way"!
- "KAGAN'S KOMEDY"!
- THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX
- Heartfelt Tribute: DICK CLARK JOKES From My 1980's Act!
- "DESIGNER POLITICS" An Apolitical Fantasy!
- "YOUR JOB ON THE LAUGHTER SCALE"! From Plumber to Proctologist
- "SISTERS UNDER THE SKIN" The Gabors & Kardasians!
- "OH CLOONEY...WE HARDLY KNEW YE"!
- "KIM HUSTLE'S THE BUSTLE"!
- "THE OTHER WOMAN was TWEETY BIRD"! Ashton & Demi Split
- "THE BIG 100"...and you thought it was hard turning 40!
- "The SPELL CHECK Gal & The GPS Guy"...Match made in Cyb%rspase!
- "ONE IN A MILLENNIUM"! Y2K Revisited!
- "Back To The Future...1999 THE YEAR OF LIVING DANGEROUSLY"!
- "You CAN Take It With You"..Thinking inside the Box!
- "TIGER'S MYSTERY WOMAN #36"!
- "DICK, ANDY...Again, Misunderstood"!
- NON-PARTISAN Politics Ha ha
- "MARILYN O'SANDS GOES GREEN" Trippin' With Obama! Repost
- "SOPHMORIC RHETORIC SPIN ON OBAMA"
- "LIBERALS LAUGH LAST"..Obama @ OPEN MIKE!
- OBAMA'S ROOMIES: "TIME SHARES @ THE WHITE HOUSE"!
- "RED, WHITE & Light BLUISH" Fading Jobs!
- "FUNNY BUSINE$$" Obama TIES One On!
- "OBAMA'S 4 Year Term in BOWLING LINGO"!
- "PILLOW TALK" Debt Ceiling Climax - Scripted
- "OBAMAMAN" WILL SAVE THE DAY!
- "What the House OVERSIGHT COMMITTEE Found on OBAMA"!
- "WHO ORDERED THE KOSHER MEAL" Barack & Ben's Swap Meet!
- "OBAMA WAS ONE OF THE NAVY SEALS"!!
- "PRESIDENT OBAMA IS CHEERED"..TRUMP Sucks His Binky!
- "BLACK TIE, WHITE SOCKS"..Dinner with Obama!
- "OBAMA & FOX TV" O'REALLY?
- SARAH PALIN
- "PALIN Comes Clean at the Sit & Spin LAUNDRETTE"!
- "Palin PLANS...and GOD LAUGHS"! REAGAN Recycled
- "PALIN to make a GRAND ENTRANCE"...Counting on the MOOSE VOTE!
- MICHELE BACHMANN
- "THAT'S SO GAY"...You Have To Be Carefully Taught!
- "CAT FIGHT"! The Michele & Sarah Scratch-Off!
- "TOO PRETTY FOR PRESIDENT"..Bachmann's Mirror Image!
- "COUNTRY FRIED BLOG"..The Clogged Arteries Tour!
- "BACH MANNia"!
- "WATERLOO, IOWA Bachmann's ABBA Moment"!
- ARNOLD SCHWARTZNEGGER
- "WHO YOU GONNA CALL... "Sexbusters"?
- "GOOD HOUSEKEEPING"..Governor's Seal Of Approval!
- "Rx: Antidotes for Aphrodesiacs"!
- ANTHONY WEINER
- "WEINER'S DREAM"..Stand-Up Comedy DOWN MEXICO WAY!
- "PINOCCHIO & WEINER..The Nose Knows"!
- "WEINER'S WEENIE A WINNER"...Say That 3 Times!
- "140 CHARACTERS & A PENIS".. The Musical!
- "WHERE THERE'S SMOKE THERE'S WEINERS"!
- "BODY LANGUAGE...Weiner's Podium Tells"!
- CHARLIE SHEEN
- "ONE & 1/2 MEN"!
- "FOOLS, TROLLS & A.A. Holes"!
- "Sheen SHIRKS Shirts" Bowling For Bimbos!
- No Comedy Zone
- "THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM" Cleaning Up After Arnold!
- "HIDDEN PASSAGEWAY" Horror Unearthed In America!
- "WHAT STICKS IN YOUR CRAW"?
- "SARAH'S KEY" Unlocks Tears of Yesterday
- "DYING TO LIVE" My Mother's 100 year Battle For Life"!
- NIXON'S WATERLOO - "MY AMERICAN SCANDAL"! OC
- "SPACE SHUTTLE HEROES & My Audition"!
- "9/11 SOUND BUT NO PICTURES"!
- "READING BETWEEN THE LINES" The Evolution of Books!
- "ELIZABETH TAYLOR Slept Here" Part 1
- "ELIZABETH TAYLOR Slept Here" Part 2
- WHAT WAS I THINKING?
- "BILL MAHER & HIS WHITE SHEEP BROTHER BOB"!
- CHUMLEE "Sexiest Man Alive" PAWN STAR HAS BALLS
- "TWINS BORN 5 YEARS APART"!
- "LUXURY One LINERS" on the Kvetch Ketch!
- "CIRCUMCISION..Tips From A Mohel"!
- "PREMATURE EVACUATION" EXIT SEAT Employment!
- "BORAT Does THE INTERNET"!
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