Nonviolent Revolution for a Family Friendly US

Redstocking Grandma

Redstocking Grandma
Location
Baldwin, New York,
Birthday
July 17
Bio
My name is Mary Joan Koch. The Redstockings were a NYC radical feminist group in the late 60s and early 70s. I have five grandchildren, 5, 3 1/2, 3 1/2, 2, and 1. Becoming a grandma has rekindled my radical feminism. I speak for the children.

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NOVEMBER 10, 2010 9:00PM

Is Your Babysitter a Guy?

Rate: 5 Flag

KenKochkids

PeterVanessa74  MarkVanessaflute74chris028

michaelvanessa

Would you trust your children to any of these disreputable men? My youngest uncle, 9 years older, is smoking a pipe. Jesus's rates were low (my third brother).  Emma loved her 15-year-old uncle's flute playing and would run from anywhere in my parent's home to listen, enraptured. at his feet. That bearded guy with the glasses is her Daddy.  Emma is reading to my fourth brother in the last picture. One day on the train, age 2, Emma inquired: "Daddy, where did all their beards go?"

I had 3 young uncles 9, 11, and 13 years older who have been absolutely wonderful to me all my life.  I lived with my mother's family  (5 uncles, 1 aunt) the first two years of my life before my dad returned from the war and my parents could afford a house.  Uncle Frank and I watched Sal Maglie pitch a no-hitter for the Dodgers in a September 1956 night game. We were thrilled when our uncles came to Uniondale to babysit. Uncle Frank, six foot five, would hang from the top of the swing set, and we were allowed to keep all the money that fell out of his pockets. My brothers were outraged when our uncles got married and had children of their own, and they were stuck with me as their babysitter. I have never had a tougher job.  Potato chip bribes were often necessary.

I admit I would not have trusted my brother Joe, 18 months younger as a babysitter. He had a proven track record of getting younger brothers on the roof.  Noq Joe is the father of six  (4 boys, 2 girls) and the grandpa of four. T  My youngest brothers were 15 and 17 when my daughter Emma was born. Going on vacation with them was pure joy for my daughters. My youngest brother (flutist) lived with us for 9 months when he was 20.  His nieces were in heaven.

In NYC women's liberatiion was at its height when my three older daughters were born. We were all obsessed with nonsexist childrearing. My daughters' playgroups had helping daddies as well as helping mommies. We used a babysitting cooperative of parents when we went out; daddies were more likely to be the evening babysitters. My kids were much more excited when someone's daddy was coming and let down if the mommy showed up.

Michelle  had a male nursery school teacher. My daughters had one male teacher in a one-room schoolhouse private school in Maine. On Long Island they only had two male teachers in grade school; one was their favorite teacher. My brother is a grade school teacher in Maine. He says male teachers of young children feel like everyone regards them as potential child molesters.

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, men comprise:

5.4 % of Child Care Workers
8.5 % of Teacher Assistants
2.7 % of Preschool and Kindergarten Teachers

What are we teaching our children about sex roles? Have you used guys as babysitters? When did your child first have a male teacher?  How do you answer if your children inquire why they never have men as teachers? Do you encourage your teen  sons to babysit? How would you react if you son announced he wanted to teach kindergarten? Or even fourth grade? How old were you when you had your first male teacher? Were any of your babysitters guys? OS men, did you babysit?

What does this teach our children about sex roles? No wonder young boys have more trouble adjusting to totally women-dominated classrooms.

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Comments

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My husband was an at-home dad for five years (until he went to nursing school... where he was one of two men in his class of 50). I had a man for a kindergarten teacher, and a male teacher in the third grade. My daughter has a wonderful male teacher this year (fifth grade) but it's the first she's ever had. My son never had a male teacher until middle school.

Like your brother's experience, people also give men at a playground on a Tuesday morning at 10:00 a.m. the evil eye, even when they're there with their own children. A man? Out of work? He must be dangerous. I had people ask me if my husband was disabled. I had men at my work roll their eyes and say "Wow, how can I get a gig like that?"

Great post. Great topic. Men deserve the ability to choose their own professions, just like women.
froggy, I am you glad you dropped in and I could discover your blog. I love your post on your mid-school journals. When I was 15, I wrote a long letter to myself when I had a 15 year old daughter, but then I trashed it.

Probably because my older kids went to nursery school and early grade school in Chelsea, there were more at-home dads than there are now. Of course, living in the city was still affordable.
The comments here show a wonderful thing!!

More and more women are coming to realize that women's liberation entails men's liberation too.
My dad spent more time with me than my mom when i was growing up and i can relate real well with the opposite sex and a good male role model for young girls makes them more confident and secure of themselves
I actually did have male teachers and a male babysitter, but maybe I'm weird. rated