El Id

is a brat

Matt Paust

Matt Paust
Location
Gloucester, Virginia,
Birthday
December 31
Bio
Sorry - writer's block... BTW the "birthday" listed above is false. I prefer to keep that day private, but am not permitted to do so here, so I'm forced to lie.

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MAY 20, 2010 9:35AM

First speeding ticket - so who's lying?

Rate: 8 Flag

 

Who ya gonna believe, Ohio History Central or the U.S. Census Bureau?

Google it and you will find that the Bureau wins hands down. Because? The feds invariably trump any state, watch it buster our badges are bigger? Well, could be. But, as this is an objective, unbiased report, I shall simply lay out the evidence (yikes, I almost said “facts”) and let you, the almighty reader, decide for yerself.liar

Evidence: The Census report is cited by everyone else.

Question: Everyone else but...?

Answer: So far as Evidence Clearinghouse has determined, everyone else but Ohio History Central, which claims, to wit: “The world's first speeding ticket was issued in Dayton, Ohio in 1904.” Details? Here y'are: “...the first speeding ticket for an automobile driver. In 1904, Dayton, Ohio, police ticketed Harry Myers for going twelve miles per hour on West Third Street.” horseless carriage

Seems pretty definitive, I agree. But here's what our friends at Census tell us, as referenced on the blogsite Ask MJ : "May 20th, 1899, Jacob German (a New York City cab driver) was arrested for speeding. He was also driving 12 miles per hour, down Lexington street in Manhattan.  He was imprisoned in the East 22nd Street station house.  He didn’t have to surrender his registration and license, as those weren’t required by law until 1901 in New York." NYC taxi 

But waitaminute. MJ has dug a little deeper than the myriad other sources that burbled up on Google. Here's whatimean: MJ explains that Harry's ticket was the “first recorded paper ticket” issued for speeding. Evidently paper tickets hadn't been invented  when New York's finest pulled Jacob into history.

So there ya have it, speed demons. On this day 111 years ago the loooong irritating, revenue-generating nightmare began. Soon, people, soon, I do hereby promise, Evidence Clearinghouse will blog about the day the radar detector stymied its first smirking, sneering quota-seeking, despicable, wife-beating, donut-stealing, halitosis emitting hidden speedtrap enforcement bureaucrat.   

Until then, demons, drive like the wind, BUT keep an eye on your rear view mirrors.

 

Images from iClipart 

Evidence Clearinghouse is a wholly owned subsidiary of this blog and no other. 

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Comments

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My first speeding ticket was in a construction zone. I never saw the one inch by one inch bilingual signs. I swear I did not.
The ticket was issued by a stern police officer telling me that I could have killed someone that wielded a shovel.
In the back seat two small children roared with laughter.
Laugh all you want sweet things. No A & W for you.:)
Rated with hugs and the need for better glasses.
Linda, I've a hunch you have gotten one or two tickets since that one. Just a hunch. If I'm wrong I'll skip lunch.
Well, Matt, you witnessed them both, so you should know the truth. I know you were just a small boy then, but still...,
Scanner, what OS big kids say: PFFFFFFFFFT.
Scanner brings the LOL's! I'm more likely to be ticketed for driving too slowly. But I have been arrested for speeding - on Martha's Vineyard, going 35 in a 25 MPH zone.
My registration had been revoked, through no fault of my own. A system error at the DMV.
I had two lawyers in the car. Hauled off to jail. Bailed out before it was cocktail hour. Ironically, a friend of mine got arrested the same day, so we saw each other in jail.
Aim, those lawyers shoulda been able to get you out on recognizance. Or did you mouth off to the cop? Bad donut jokes? Or did all three of you burst into sobbing? My wife's 61 and got her very first ticket last weekend, from a state trooper, as she and our daughter were headed to Pennsylvania for a modeling seminar. I know the trooper's dad, a retired state police first sergeant, but have never met the kid, who shoulda let my wife off with a warning nonetheless. Sometimes the light's all shinin on meeeeee, other times I can hardly seeeeeee....
12 miles per hour. Those were the good old days.

I've made the drive between Boston and Pennsylvania round trip eight times this year. States not to speed in are Connecticut and Pennsylvania. I80 through Pennsylvania, watch it. If you're on a curve and your field of vision is blocked, there's a state trooper for sure right around the bend.
Thanx, Suzanne. I've a feeling all the states are ramping up their deniable quotas to bolster budget necessities these fiscally dire days.
The lawyers DID note that I was not mirandized. Chung chung. The best part was getting booked:
The booking officer noticed we had the same birthday! He was really excited about it. I was handcuffed.
"Wow, should we plan a party together, sir?"
I'll bring the donuts.
As someone who recently has come to DESPISE the FUZZ - this was yums.

"radar detector stymied its first smirking, sneering quota-seeking, despicable, wife-beating, donut-stealing, halitosis emitting hidden speedtrap enforcement bureaucrat. "
my first speeding ticket (i was 16, wearing a bikini) was my older brother's fault. he let me drive his car and then egged me on. i tried telling that to the policeman, but he just made me get out of the car and stand in the road while all the neighbors drove by, honking. thanks, bro.
@femme forte: You're lucky. If that had happened today, your 16-year-old bikini'd self would be all over YouTube.
I've had one ticket, when I was seventeen. I've only been pulled over for speeding/infractions five times, each time given a warning. I swear I didn't cry or beg. I just handed over my license and registration, and then got a mild warning. (I think maybe they are making up for the one time I got pulled over at the age of eighteen -- not for speeding, but on a rural road by a very frightening policeman, who might have done me harm if not for a guardian angel, a woman in a car that passed me and turned around so see what was going on, standing silent witness, until he had no options but to let me drive off. I was too shaken to ever thank her, and we were in separate cars, but I always think of her, and what she did.)
Gadzooks, I forgot to check the comments! Thanks for stopping by, friends. Remember, speed may be fun but tickets can sure as hell kill a good time.