In a predictable move Thursday, the Fictional Society of Pusillanimous Negative Amazon Blurbists has bestowed its weekly rookie recognition ribbon on "GV", who last week pounded a 99-cent ebook in his "customer review" as "the worst novel I have never read", immediately prompting downloads of the besmirched novel by multitudes of curious readers.
Questioned by the book's author next day in a chance bar meeting as to how an unread book could inspire such innovative invective, GV is reported to have said, "Well, I loved the title, the cover and your blurb but I was under intense pressure to get my negative blurb posted by FSOPNAB's weekly recognition deadline. As a former newspaper hack I tend to be more creative on deadline."
As eavesdropping bar patrons broke into passionate applause, the author bought GV a pitcher of beer and gave him several brotherly slaps on the back, causing the pitcher to topple into GV's lap and drench him thoroughly. The two promptly repaired to the parking lot and continued celebrating until police and an ambulance arrived.