Living the Bi Life

for you commie, homolesboswitchhittertranny-lovin' sons-of-guns

Max the Communist

Max the Communist
Chicago, Illinois, USA
January 17
"Her beauty served a mob of terror whose one mission is to destroy." Yeah, that's me alright. I am a writer, actor, activist. That means I've worked in the hospitality and retail industries. Before you ask for fries with that, prepare yourself for political, economic, social, and sexual liberation. Not a total commie. I just marvel at the inflammatory red-baiting language--so much like queer-baiting, it's scaaary. I will be your downfall yet, America. Until then, I go for universal healthcare and making friends with anarchists, hippies, fellow-travelers, philosophers, actors, and other troublemakers. And, of course, da queers. So I'm pinko. Does that make me more Canadian than anything else? How queer are they in Canukistan? And can they put me up for the night--you know, just in case? In other words, just your typical OS blogger.

DECEMBER 16, 2010 3:12PM

Making it with a bi guy--or, the queering of breeder sex.

Rate: 3 Flag

 a boy a girl and a dildo

Sorry I've been away so long peeps.  

I've been job hunting and staying alive.  Writing theater criticism for pays a little, but not enough.  I'm working on this being my breakthrough month for full-time employment.  Your kind thoughts, prayers and encouragement are always deeply appreciated.

 I probably wouldn't have posted at all but this little bit of excellent writing caught my eye.  Rachel Rabbit White's "I'm in a bisexual marriage"  provides much-needed relief to all the"why-I'd-never-date- a-bisexual-man" writing that's found out there on heterosexual women's dating and relationships websites .

queer looking diane arbus and man 

I do find his bisexuality hot. It’s not that I’m into the fact that he’s into sucking c**k and Christian Bale. It’s that he’s done the work on himself to know his sexuality. When we’ve hung out with guy friends who’ve said something defensive about not being gay, he’s switched it into a positive conversation about sexuality and how he knew he was bi. It’s self-confidence. It’s being comfortable in your own skin. And that I’m into.

One Friday evening we took a visit to our local feminist sex shop. It’s the kind of place with non-threatening pastel walls and sample toys to fondle. Suddenly, we came upon it: a beautiful 7-inch, vein-y dildo. Made from silicone. It even had balls! My husband ran his finger along the shaft and I knew we were taking it home. 

How refreshing to find a woman take on and enjoy gender transgression with her bi guy while eroticizing the gender exploration in herself.  Being bi herself, no doubt, helps.  But I have a sneaking suspicion straight-identified folks here at OS will open up about their gender play a little more if they just pass this article around amongst themselves.

So whaddaya say, breeders?  Care to share the queer kink you get up to behind close doors?  Be my guests! And of course, queer/pansexual/bi friends, your tales of queering breeder sex are always welcome.

ye olde dildo shoppe

Hmm . . . the curious and inquiring  patrons of Ye Olde Dildo Shoppe. 

strap on dildo

. . . and a contemporary version. 




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I'm probably one of your few readers who's both bisexual and really tame (as far as sexual adventurousness is concerned). I haven't dated a bi guy since my early 20s so don't remember much that set those guys (there were a couple of them) apart from straight guys I've dated. And I've never been to a sex shop or used a sex toy (really!) Guess I'm just an old fashioned bi lady...
I've never dated a bi-guy either! ;~)

Welcome back, dude!
I was married to a bisexual 35 years ago and found it an extremely liberating experience. Most straight people have homo-erotic fantasies and dreams all the time. In my experience most women talk about them pretty openly. However with men, they go into a taboo compartment they keep hidden, even from the woman with whom they supposedly share their most intimate thoughts and feelings. The problem arises when more and more stuff gets crammed into this taboo compartment - until true emotional intimacy becomes impossible.
@Eva--yeah, I don't expect the young bi guys to be that experienced enough to be ready to really let their inhibitions go. I seem to meet the guys who are just beginning to explore their attraction to men--they're still a little leery of anal play.

As for you, bi lady, I'm quite sure that you are charmingly old fashioned.
@Safe_Bet's Amy--but I bet you know how to handle a dildo!

Thanks. It's good to be back.
@Dr.--men do get weird with their secrets and their compartmentalization, don't they? One bi gal I knew in the late Eighties joined my little bi support group and she was out to her straight boyfriend. She only learned two years later that he had actually worked the streets, "gay for pay," when he could have told her much earlier. I mean, who's going to be more understanding about that than your sex-positive bi girlfriend?
"sleeping with the enemy" huh?
Im impressed with the new tone of tolerance in this post that I havent seen in your earlier ones.
hey is that a real woodcut or is it a joke? it would be interesting to hear the background. and your other pictures--- wonder where they came from. Im not so into pop culture that they are instantly recognizable.
I'll probably sound like a straight fool asking this, but what is a pansexual? And breeder sex reminds me of Brad Pitt's character, Early, in the movie Kalifornia when he tells David duchovny that his girlfriend is a "breeder".
Bis get shafted (yes, I know) so often, that I'm glad to see this. I'm a bi married to another bi in a monogamous marriage. Most people just assume we're lesbians, which is fine, except that the ol' definitions get reinforced. I could say, "There's "bi" in every les-bi-an," but...I won't.
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Who don't need sex?? so anyone like a big one??"> Signs of Strep Throat