Here we go again. Those who follow this ridiculous blog of mine know that I get some goofy things in my regular in box and I sometimes post them here for all to enjoy. Well, today's post is all about Fucking. Fucking Austria, that is.
It seems that the British are totally obsessed with Fucking, Austria of all things.
Apparently they like to steal the Fucking signs and take them home for souvenirs just to proof they've been up to Fucking.
"Hey, man. Wucha been up to?".........."Fucking, man. I've been up to Fucking!!!"
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Here is the above article:
Germans not Amused
LONDON: (AFP) British tourists have left the residents of one charming Austrian village effing and blinding by constantly stealing the signs for their oddly named village.
While British visitors are finding it hilarious, the residents of Fucking are failing to see the funny side.
Only one kind of criminal ever stalks the sleepy 32 house villiage near Salzburg on the German border--cheeky British tourists armed with a sense of humour and a screwdriver.
But the local authorities are hitting back with the signs now set in concrete, police chief Kommandant Schmidtberger is on the lookout.
"We will not stand for the Fucking signs to be removed," the officer said. "It may be very amusing for you British, but Fucking is simply Fucking to us. What is the big Fucking joke? It is puerile." (puerile means childish, I looked it up)
Local tourist guide Andreas Ruhmueller said it was only the British that had a fixation on Fucking.
The Germans all want to see the Mozart house in Salzburg," he explained.
"Every American only seems to care only about the Sound of Music (the 1955 film shot around Salzberg).
The occasional Japanese wants to see Hitler's birthplace in Braumau.
"But for the British, it's all about Fucking."
Guesthouse manager Augustina Lindbauer described the village's breathtaking lakes, forests and vistas.
"Yet, still there is this obsession with Fucking,"she said.
"Just this morning I had to tell an English lady who stopped by that there were no Fucking postcards."
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If you have any thoughts about Fucking, here are the directions so you can get right to it.
And here's a photo of one those Fucking British tourists.
This sign says '"Bitte! Nicht so schnell", which in English translates to "Please! Not so fast!" So slow down while in Fucking.
If you like to use a GPS while traveling, you'll know when you're getting close to Fucking because it will tell you so. There is Fucking up ahead.
And when you leave this little hamlet you'll also know when you're done with Fucking. See? No more Fucking.
All this talk about Fucking raises some questions about Fucking that need to be considerer:
Are the residents called Fuckers or just plain old Fucks? Fuckettes?
What is the Fucking neighborhood like?
What do they call their mothers?
What do they teach at the Fucking High School?
Do they have a Fucking Post Office?
Does the Fucking Hospital have an ER?
And what about those Fucking drivers?
If your friend came from another town, he wouldn't be your Fucking friend, would he?
Is skinny-dipping allowed in the Fucking Lake?
Can you have a wonderful time at Fucking?
Can you stay in a Fucking chalet?
Does Fucking need government funding or does it stand on it's own?
Do they have an annual Gay Fucking Parade?
Does anyone care about Fucking, but the Fuckers?
Does everyone like Fucking?
-- Pronounced 'fooking'.-- The little hamlet of Fucking is named after the man who founded the village in the 6th century -- his name? Focko.
Go figure.
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ronnierayjenkins
LuluandPhoebe
Andy Heizeler
old new lefty
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Comments
(I'm not sure I can stop, Michael. HELP!)
Whew!
I think I'm finished with Fucking.
(oops)
I'm sure the Brits just consider it good Fucking fun.
Makes Intercourse, PA seem tame by comparison though.
fucking rated!
Great fucking post..
When exiting the Autobahn, look for the 'Ausfahrt' signs at the off-ramp. Yeah, no shit.
Umby, Fooking is just plain funny, but it's hard to use in a sentence.
O'Really? There was a video on the web. The guy went all the way through town in less than a minute!
Sorry, Stellaa. I would have written about real sex, but I'm under qualified.
COS, I wish I could take credit for the idea, but really stole it and doctored it up a bit.
DeliaBlack, I miss Fucking, too! I'm still saving myself for you. ;-)
bahHHMblog, Sorry about the deception.
MaryT, I still wearing my abstinence ring. It makes me feel safe.
Maria Stuart, You, too?! There's a lot of that going around.
Zuma, You are correct except for the scholar part.
Spotted_mind, Have some more spots for your mind. You thought I'd write something naughty. Shame on you. ;-)
Tom, Can't say that I know much German, but fahrt is funny in any language!
GeeBee, That is funny! Maybe I should Google the Twatt and do a post on that tomorrow. Great minds think alike.
Steve Blevins, I had to look it up, too.
Ben Sen, Thanks. I think.
Fireeyes, you don't have to go all the way to Austria just to get to Fucking, just head to Florida. ;-)
shaggylocks, No cheese in Fucking, from what I hear anywhey.
BBE, Thanks, man!
Lea Lane, As much as you travel, I thought you'd know how do get to Fucking. I'm so out of practice I doubt that I could get to Fucking with two maps and a GPS.
Smithery, Ausfarht. Hehehehehe!
Jane Smithie, Doesn't that just figure. There isn't a swear word in the whole piece. (okay, maybe a few) Adsense can keep their two cents. Fuck'em. I don't write for them. Should have titled the piece Fucking in Spamalot. Hehe.
Owl_Says_Who, Hard to explain things like that to the elderly. Nothing I hate to hear from my Mother worse than "I don't get it."
What is the birth rate in Fucking?
Don't the British have fucking in their land?
Cool! Rated
I have nothing else to say about Fucking.
Bill, I know.
Aim, Shaggy was quick on the draw with that one.
Fucking Rated!
- rated & hoping for a trip to this fantastic place
ps: the last sign must have influenced Nancy Reagan's "Just Say No" drug campaign.
Who doen't like Fucking? It looks like a nice place to be.
I have never laughed so hard in a very long time.
Thanks for this.
Rated a a Fucking Good Time
Fokker.
If you're operating in relatively busy airspace, you'll get air traffic control telling you about potentially conflicting aircraft. And it was an oldie but a goodie, when advised that there was a Fokker, to reply back "I've got the Fokker in sight."
The joke evolved somewhat. Some of the Fokkers had larger engines than others, so sometimes the reply would be "I've got the big motor Fokker in sight."
And what do you call a Fokker that's been sitting around a long time and gathered a lot of dust?
A dirty Fokker.
Miko, I only write about what I know about, so sex is out of the question, but Fucking................ask me about Fucking.
Cymraeg, It just comes natural, doesn't it?
George, I'll bet that IS where Nancy got the idea. We better not let Sarah Palin get a hold of this.
Just Cathy, They are a hndy device aren't they? Now if someone will invent one that vibrates, we'll all be set.
Ablonde, I don't think they fuck in Fucking. Doesn't look like their population has gone up in centuries.
Ocularnervosa, Not to mention the fucking fine and the fucking bail.
Valerie Lopez, Had I known you write erotica I would have been right over. From what I understand, it's customary to stop at Brest on the way to Fucking, but it's not a requirement if you are short on time.
Mission, So glad I could make you laugh today. It is my mission. ;-)
Sally, why am I not surprised that you know that?
Roy,Slow and easy wins that race, eh?
VR, I have pictures, though I've never been there.
Buffy, I can't imagine any way that you could sneak into Fucking.
NoisyNora, I hear that route 69 is a fine way to reach Climax. There is also an Intercourse in Michigan. I think you can get to Climax through there, too!
OEsheepdog, no this is not a work friendly post, but I'm glad you made it anyway.
Gwool, Yes, yes, yes! We don't have 6.5 billion people on the planet by being obsessed with baseball.
Mission, You know that you are welcome anytime. Some of these OS folks have some razor sharp wits, eh?
The guy who's interviewing him says, we'd just like our listeners to know that the Fokker is a type of aircraft made by a Dutch company. Please don't be offended.
And then the WWII vet says, no, those fuckers were Messerschmitts!
Monsieur Chariot, Shaggylocks says the don't even make cheese there, No Fucking whey.
GracieLou!!!!! Yes, I kiss my mom with this mouth, just not when I'm in Fucking. (Yikes, that doesn't read well at all) And thanks for calling me bitch. I've missed you.
Sirenita, Exactly!
Tony Wang! That's the Joke! Well done, sir. Glad someone around here still has some brain cells that work.
Isn't that what Verbal always says? Or someone. It's a great verb and great exclamation as well.
Rated
Hilarious post!
:)
Good, clean, fucking fun!
And Horndl.