This is for the guy who comes to my Starbucks* laden with every form of electronic device, a power strip, and apparently, the entire day to kill, sucks up a couple of tables and electrical outlets, and “purchases” only an ice water. 

You got a lot to learn, buddy. … Read full post »

My Dearest Daughter,  

Have you ever wondered why I sit in bed with you every night until you fall asleep?  You may think it’s because I love you, and yes, that has something to do with it.  But there is another, more accurate, reason for our nighttime ritual.  Here it… Read full post »

I’ve figured it out.  I’ve figured out how to get rid of Sarah Palin.  And I owe it all to my addiction: The Simpsons.

I suffer from an somewhat rare disorder called Simpsons-mania. The primary symptom of this disorder presents as a compulsive and incessant need to cite scenes… Read full post »

I have a single female friend who is on the hunt for a boyfriend.  Recently, while recounting her latest dating disappointment, she noted with obvious disdain that her date de jour didn’t open any doors for her, nor did he offer to pay for her dinner.  “Any decent man would have/… Read full post »

If life were fair…

Tofu would taste like chicken, chicken would taste like beef, and cows would fart pine-scented petroleum.

Assholes would never get ahead.  They would never acquire massive amounts of wealth.  They would never run multinational corporations, lead countries, or wor… Read full post »

I came. I saw.  I had an awesome frickin’ time.  But for the life of me, I can’t say exactly why. 

Maybe it was the better than you could ask for autumn day.  Maybe it was the mass of people, politely gathered for a common, if ill-defined purpose.  Maybe… Read full post »

Dearest Kimiko,

The right thing to do.  You’re going to hear this phrase thrown around a lot, both by people who know what the phrase means and by those who don’t.  I’m not going to pretend like I know what it means.  I don’t.  Don’t trust anyone who… Read full post »

Ever wondered how the end times are coming along?  Well, wonder no more... 

SETTING: 

Hell – fire, brimstone, tortured souls, broken toilets, no Internet.  Your typical land of eternal punishment.

In the northeast corner, between the River Styx and Wal Mart corporate head… Read full post »

Many have made the claim that gay marriage will hurt traditional marriage and bring about the downfall of civilized society, but few have bothered to delineate the precise process by which this will occur. 

Until now.

            Recently,/… Read full post »

The other day I saw something rather disturbing.  I didn’t think I’d see something like this in my lifetime, or at least I had hoped I wouldn’t.  But there it was, right in front of me, unmistakable in its debaseness.  An ugly thing. A sad thing.

It was a… Read full post »

The stories we typically hear about Comic-Con are those of celebrity sightings, exclusive Hollywood reveals, costumed fanatics, and occasionally, comics and the nerds who love them.  But beneath this glitzy, high-profile, increasingly Hollywood exterior lies another reality, a bedrock of dedica… Read full post »

Can an atheist (or non-theist or the deity-challenged or whatever nomenclature blows your hair back) be spiritual? 

I’m not sure.  I guess it depends.

Is it spiritual to contemplate the enormity of the universe, to ponder the billions upon billions of stars spread upon an infinite… Read full post »

The billions of folks on this planet hold myriad images of God in their minds.  One image is the old coot with a long white beard, an image that seems to attend Christian religions.  Another is the amorphous being of blinding light and booming voice.  There are also the god-in-human-fo… Read full post »

(For you my dear friend, Patrick) 

Every single writer has been there.  You’ve worked long and hard on your project.  Maybe it was a script or a novel or a short story.  You labored over the first draft.   You diligently revised it several times.  You a/… Read full post »

Now that the healthcare bill has passed, I’m waiting for all socialist hell to break loose. As foretold by the prophets at Fox News, the health care bill will usher in the apocalypse and brutally end civilization as we know it.  It’s only a matter of time. While we’re waiting,… Read full post »

Today I’d like to talk about religious stereotypes.  Well, actually, I should say non-religious stereotypes. Okay, atheists.  I want to talk about atheists. 

Yeah, I know. That topic sounds about as inviting as a naked soak in a cesspool with a hepatitis-infected leper, but indu… Read full post »

I’m overdue for a blog entry.  I could give all the standard excuses: I’ve been sick, my husband’s been sick, work’s been busy, I’ve got other writing projects to tend to and serious family issues to deal with.  They’re all true, and probably valid explan… Read full post »

I maimed a guy.  Okay, maybe not maimed.  That’s giving me too much credit. Inflicted a nasty injury upon him. However you define what I did, it wasn’t as hilarious as it looks on America’s Funniest Home Videos. 

What exactly did I do?

We played racquetball without… Read full post »

Last night I heard what Pat Robertson had to say about Haiti.

“Something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it," he said on Christian Broadcasting Network's The 700 Club. "They were under the heel of the French. You know, Napoleon… Read full post »

http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/wayoflife/12/25/RichJesus/index.h 

Was Jesus poor, or was he rich? 

 I’m here to tell you definitively and without a shred of doubt in my mind that I don’t give a rat’s hinny whether he was or not.  In the grand scheme of… Read full post »

My Dearest Kimiko,

Here is another great truth of life, one that I hope you come to grips with sooner rather than later, for the sooner you accept this profound truth, the sooner you will find inner peace (or at least a relative dearth of angst, which for most intents… Read full post »

Dear Scientists of the Climatic Research Unit at the University of East Anglia;

I just have to ask.

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?!?

Why, oh, why did you sully your science? Why, oh, why did you have to touch your numbers? I know how tempting it… Read full post »

Recently I received a link to a YouTube video of famed atheist and evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins being allegedly stumped by a question by an interviewer.  It went something like this:

Interviewer: Can you give an example of a genetic mutation or an evolutionary process which ca… Read full post »

I’m sick.  I’ve got a fever, chills, body aches, headache, and fatigue.  In short, I feel like crap.  Am I mentioning this to get sympathy?  You bet.  There is nothing good about being sick except for that “ahhh, poor baby”  you get from friends,… Read full post »

Hi. Welcome to my new and improved blog, or as I think of it, my humble attempt to help a few searching souls help themselves.

And how exactly do I plan to accomplish this nifty little feat?

I’m not going to do it by offering a weekly rant on what’s wrong with… Read full post »