A few months ago I was at a week-long women writer’s retreat. At our first session, we were to pull something out of a basket and let it inspire a ten minute free write. This made me nervous. Creativity is one of my strengths, but sometimes it escapes when I make demands. Most of the women searched and selected. If I did that I would take too long considering possibilities and later regret I didn’t choose something else. 

When the basket came to me I grabbed without looking. It was a deck of jumbo playing cards. I didn’t laugh out loud because people were busy writing, but this was so perfect I wanted to squeal. 

In my cell phone my parents’ phone number is still there. The picture icon is a deck of cards.  I tried to delete their phone number once, but the phone asked me a question. “Delete number?”  

Sometimes I think about calling it.  But if someone answered I’d have to explain why I called and sound crazy, or lie and say “Sorry, wrong number”.  My parents hated lies regardless of the reason. If I hung up, the person might call back and I would hear my parent’s ringtone, and see the deck of cards flash on the phone screen, and for one second I might believe it was them.

That first year they kept coming into my dreams. They uncovered memories and showed me things they hadn't told me, but now know as if they had. On the morning of the first anniversary of my mother’s death, she woke me up.  “Sharon! It’s time to write your stories.”

Three years later I was in a place reminiscent of family camping adventures, working at becoming a writer. I thought about them that morning and knew I wouldn’t be here if they hadn’t died. Picking that deck of cards an hour later told me they were okay with that.  

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Below is the link to Judy Bridges, (writer and mentor) author of "Shut Up & Write", who facilitates amazing writer workshops and retreats. If you ever have a chance to go to one, do. Or buy her book. Or both. 

http://redbirdstudio.com/