This was so silly I couldn't stop giggling. Well Done!

michael steele is indeed inspiring!!! hee hee!

Boner & Steele - wasn't that a Walter Egan song?

I was laughting out loud! Excellent!!!!

cole county select..................

I MUST find a way to implant this video in my head right now before I go to work so that I can merge with it all day long and have it as MINE.

So funny!!!

(rated)

birderers are ruining this great nation, imho.

Brilliant! I'm flipping you--a big thumbs up!
Funny, funny, funny!

You know "Boehner and Steel" sounds like a 70s buddy cop show, doesn't it!
Outstanding.

God Bless Bush (His Name Be Praised). Competency in extreme situations is Elitist!!!

Your delivery is very good. "His name is Michael Steele, and guess what, he's black."

That baby face helps.

Bwahahaha!

Although I will say that I prefer you scruffy and drunk.

Yeah, Scully--such a girl. I mean, god, did you see his cool-as-cucumber interviews? Obviously crying inside.

You are not funny, you are not informed, you have no idea what or how free markets work. You have been made drunk and blind with "Identity Politics". Your depiction of whom you believe to be the opposition is beyond comprehension. I am sorry you have such a jaundiced view of who makes up 50+% of America. Your attack is immature and exposes your hatred. This is hate speech at it’s finest. To not know who Michael Steele is and his background of being subjected to racism because he is a black conservative, demonstrates your ignorance and insensitivity. You should be ashamed by your direct contradiction of everything Obama stands for. You are not a part of any solution. You are not a part of any of the good that makes America. You are the problem.

Randy French,

Thank you for your generous critique. However, I must take issue with your use of an apostrophe in the sentence "This is hate speech at it's finest." I am assuming that you meant to use the possessive "its" instead of the contraction "it's" as in "it is" or "it has." If I am incorrect in this assumption, please forgive me. But I believe I am correct on this point.

I am not going to jump to the conclusion, however, that you have no idea when or how to properly employ an apostrophe in Modern English. I'm going to assume it was a simple typographical error, and leave it at that. Let's not speak of it again.

Furthermore, I accept your apology ("I am sorry [you have such a jaundiced view of who makes up 50+% of America.]"), although I am somewhat disheartened to learn that I am not a part of any of the good that makes America. On this, we simply disagree.

Finally, I fear that you may be "in the tank" for Sully.

Best Wishes to you and yours.

P.S. I would love to learn "what or how free markets work." Please elaborate.

Brilliantly funny !! I had never seen the polarization of this country in that fashion. "Making popular things unpopular". Very good.

Life is sad for the liberal democrat. They now have all the power and no one else to blame for all their screw ups. So we have this piece by some pompus ass trying to be witty. Who says gitmo did not have value with idiots like this one running loose.

oops mortimer was that you in the video. Sorry bud did not realize I was speaking of you in the third person. Hey listen morty that was a real piece of shit and made you look like a real pompus ass. It was similar to watching you beat off over a picture of yourself.

Ed, you nailed it on the head. I've been trying to figure out what makes this video so awful and you're right: it has something to do with how you end up being forced to imagine Mortimer doing sexual acts. It's weird, isn't it? There is no way my mind would have gone there naturally, but suddenly I can't stop thinking of Mortimer in any other context other than a sexual one with me. Is that what happened to you to, Ed?

How can he think he's witty and clever when all he is doing is making you and I get all hot and bothered. It's kind of frustrating. And you also nailed him on gitmo. Imagine how unfunny this video would have been if you were having sexual relations with Mortimer in gitmo. He probably never even thought about that while make this thing.

Thanks for being so clear, Ed.

Finally, something funny from you!

I am afraid that trying to explain Free Enterprise to you would be like explaining Alcohloism to a drunk. You are convinced you already understand it, yet do everything in your life to undermine it. Tragically there is no 12 step program for stupid. You are the classic delusional leftist. You buy into Identity Politics at whatever level provides that days needed dose of animosity and cynicism towards normal to satisfy your addiction to hearing your own voice. Then like some mental masochist you get off on the conflict. Here's your fix.

Randy French:

"I am afraid that trying to explain Free Enterprise to you would be like explaining Alcohloism to a drunk."

You're right, Randy. But please: try explaining "Alcohloism" to me. I truly don't know what that is.

"You buy into Identity Politics at whatever level provides that days needed dose of animosity and cynicism towards normal to satisfy your addiction to hearing your own voice."

Randy, you are incorrigible! First, you're adding in apostrophes where they don't belong, now you're leaving them out!

Furthermore, Randy, I don't know why you are calling me a “leftist.” Check the record. I spent 28 days in a row attacking Obama last October/November, and all I want in this entire world is for there to be a Palin/Wurzelbacher victory in 2012. How many days did YOU spend attacking Obama? Ten? Twenty? I'll stack my right-wing bona fides against yours any day of the week, sir.

As for "getting off" on conflict, Randy, I believe you are the one who has called me uninformed, drunk, blind (offensive-- my sister is blind and has to walk with a trained dog), jaundiced, immature, hateful, racist, ignorant, insensitive, lacking in goodness, stupid, delusional, and a "mental masochist."

I think I've been relatively polite to you, galling as it might be to be attacked by a fellow conservative. But I'm not going to take the bait, Randy. The worst I can say about you is that you do not know how to use an apostrophe. And I mean that: you genuinely appear to have no idea and are just tossing them in or leaving them out, willy-nilly.

Also, your name is highly suggestive, but on this point I simply feel sorry for you. Were I a parent, I would feel uncomfortable leaving my children in the care of a Randy French person.

Best Wishes to you and yours.

And to Ed Marrow:

Sigh. I'm sorry if you think I am "pompus" but please, I beg of you: STOP ENVISIONING ME IN SEXUAL SCENARIOS.

I understand that we live in a permissive age, and that the Internet, in particular, is a haven for pornography and loose morals, but it's still disconcerting to see you publicly presenting a hypothetical fantasy in which you are some kind of voyeur, sitting in the corner, or perhaps outside lurking in the bushes, watching me engage in onanistic ritual over a photograph of myself.

I understand that none of us are perfect. I've made mistakes in the past, in my personal life, and I understand that sometimes feelings and impulses are confusing. And we must, all of us, be allowed our inner fantasy life. I wouldn't dream of denying you yours. But this is not the place, Ed.

Also, you don't know how to use commas or hyphens or even question marks. Honestly, you're worse than Randy, who at least has narrowed things down a bit. Just because we are online doesn't mean that we can't use proper English, sir.

Best Wishes to you and yours.

Spoken like a true IQ cheallenged member of a thrird world countryQ! Hey MORON, Dems and Reps are all politicians, and if you think there is a difference, you are a horses ass. Nothing has changed, all we are doing is appoitning crooks and blowing the budget, so what has changed? Get a life!

I cannot wait for your response to that!

Elvira Cat:

"IQ cheallenged"? Really?

Welcome to Open Salon. And to typing. And possibly even to spelling.

too much . Carol trying to come up with a comback and pissing herself. Meanwhile pompus ass continues acting like a pompus ass.
Really mort go back and take an objective look at this crap. If it were printed I would not even have the luxery of lining my cats litter box with it since it already reeks of fecal material.

Seriously mort too much of your ego leaking out of this piece. At least I was nice enough to tell you that your piece sucks before you sunk twenty grand into some film school with the misguided impression that you had talent to develop.

Ed Marrow:

Thanks, once again, for your kind and generous comments. And I can see now that your spelling of the word "pompous" seems to be an intentional affectation rather than an error, as I had originally presumed. My apologies.

I'd like to thank you for sharing your wit, and your heart. This can be a lonely and cruel world, so it's always nice to know that you can count on the Internet to attract people who will really give of themselves, and "tell it like it is." I could have done without quite so many references to "shit", "crap" and "fecal material", but you have your own style, and I'm certain that it works for you.

And yes, it was nice of you to tell me that my post "sucks" and that I have no talent to develop. I was surprised that you didn't finish stronger-- perhaps you could have suggested that I might as well "kill" myself, but I think you probably suspected that it would have come across as less "classy."

You have much to be proud of, Ed Marrow. May you live a long and healthy life, and tell a great many people what you think of them!

Ed, it's time to let everybody in on the joke. Come On!

Ol' Morty has a spelling fetish. You must be a 5th grade teacher because punctuation is the strongest rebuttal you have. Your weakest is pretending to be a conservative. Hey Mort, do us all a favor and leave the comedy to the pros. What you have tried to do with your "Let's get Sully" piece, is with bad sophomoric humor, misrepresent something you don’t even understand. You neither know the heart of a conservative, nor can speak on their behalf. (Humorously or not) This is truly one of those cases where Twain said it best. "Better to stay silent and look a fool, rather than speak and remove all doubt". Keep talking Morty...you are only confirming what everyone who reads you already knows.

P.S. I used spell check just for you. I hope this meets your punctuation standards. They have been so very important to you. Really, some of the professional writers on this blog should take a que from you and attack every punctuation mistake they see, just like you. I am sure you don’t mention them just to make yourself feel more superior. You sir, are a real gem. Keep talking…….yeah……keep talking.

Randy,

Thanks for giving it to us straight. You’ve made it perfectly clear what you think of Mortimer, but I’d love to know what you think of the people on Open Salon who think he’s funny. In a way are they even worse than him? You must at least respect Mr. Smyth’s work ethic. What about all these people who simply get a kick out him? I’d love to know your honest opinion about what idiots they are. You’ve opened my eyes; until you came along I thought the whole entire planet loved Mortimer….;)

Randy,

I'm really enjoying your take on Mortimer and all that he doesn't quite "understand" about conservatism.

But how is it that your spell check missed "que"...UNLESS you really are French. Ah. Quel dommage!

Randy French:

I am happy to see that you have improved your use of punctuation, or at least allowed a computer to correct the errors you are naturally prone to. My scolding of you has led to an actual, measurable improvement in the quality of your writing. (Although, for the record, that fifth sentence is a disaster, and it seems doloresflores_d has already pointed out an apparent error, if that isn’t an odd bilingual flourish.)

You can dismiss it as a “fetish” on my part, but I don’t think there is anything wrong with being thoughtful and actually making an effort to use the English language properly. (Nor do I think there is anything particularly disgraceful about being a 5th grade English teacher. I am not one, but it is an honorable profession, and I’m sure that a great many of them are capable of effectively rebutting an argument, should the occasion arise.)

As for punctuation being the “strongest rebuttal” I have, I’d have to counter by pointing out that ad hominem attacks seem to be the only weapon in your arsenal. I think the strongest point I made was to simply list the many unkind names you called me. I don’t claim to speak “on behalf” of all conservatives, and I certainly hope that you don’t either, for I think your name-calling would set a pretty poor example for all humans, regardless of political ideology.

Unless I’m mistaken, I don’t believe I have called you any names at all in our dialogue here, except “Randy, “Randy French”, and “sir.” Meanwhile, you continue to insult me with your tone and your insinuation that I am not a true conservative, and I’m bewildered by it. Any true conservative worth his salt would stay far away from quoting a left wing atheist to make his point.

You seem to run out of steam at the end of your latest comment, unless you are lapsing into some kind of “beat” poetry. In any case, I think I’d like to bid you a fond farewell, at least for now, Randy-- unless you have a more substantial point you want to make. Something other than that you don’t like me or anything I have to say or that I am “the problem” and “not a part of any of the good that makes America.”

I wish you nothing but happiness, Randy French. Despite the tone you have taken with me, and the hurtful things you’ve said, I’m going to assume that you are, at heart, a decent person who ultimately means well. I’m sure the relative anonymity of the Internet has contributed to the acrid tone here—I doubt that if we were face-to-face, you would have been nearly as hostile to me. Perhaps we might have even been friends.

You were kind enough to use spellcheck on your post, just for me, and so in your honor I am going to write these final sentence’s to you in classic Randy French style. Its the least I could do, and I hope that your going to appreciate it because it pains me a little to write like this, intentionally making the occasionol error and then hitting the send button without even glancing back to proofread it. ‘

Best Wishes to you and yours, Randy French.

I am hoping that you are appointed head of ---hmm--- what would the proper title be, I've got it. I am hoping that you, yes you, Mortimer Hayden Smyth are appointed media czar of the entire, yes the whole damned thing, Republican Party of the United States of America. How's that sound? You're darn toot'in, it's fantastic, who else would have the brilliant idea to sully Sully? This is the kind of thinking that might have saved the last election!!

I am hoping that you are appointed head of ---hmm--- what would the proper title be, I've got it. I am hoping that you, yes you, Mortimer Hayden Smyth are appointed media czar of the entire, yes the whole damned thing, Republican Party of the United States of America. How's that sound? You're darn toot'in, it's fantastic, who else would have the brilliant idea to sully Sully? This is the kind of thinking that might have saved the last election!!

Will you mentor me?

Carol setting us straight? Is morty a little thing that needs "us" to defend him?

In the all great blogosphere a poster who attacks anothers spelling as his last great defense conceeds the discussion. I thank you for your concession.

Ed, you forgot the apostrophe in "another's." I don't know if you need tutoring, or if you simply do not care. I guess it is my fault for actually noticing that you just keep on making mistake after mistake after mistake.

And I'll certainly "conceed the discussion" if that's what you'd like. I think I'd like that, too. But I want you to know that I wish you nothing but the best in the years to come, Ed. You deserve to find happiness, as we all do, and I know that yours is out there, waiting for you. Fare thee well.

Morty my boy one concession speech was sufficent. But I thank you for taking the type to provide me with a second.

You're a "flipping" genius Mortimer. I was giggling throughout. My only fear is that some Republicans have such a deadened sense of irony, they'll think you're serious. Rated.

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