My mother was one of the most naturally comedic women I have ever known.  When it comes to, “Mom Stories,” trust me, I’ve got a million of ‘em. Did you see the movie, “Mother” starring Albert Brooks and Debbie Reynolds? I swear, my siblings and I considered suing the studio, convinced that someone had spied on us, all of our lives, and had plagiarized our material. Example: The mall parking lot scene was an exact depiction of my shopping excursions with Mom. It didn’t matter what the weather, she would drive up and down rows of cars for an hour, if necessary, to find a vacancy, maybe 5 or so spots closer to the store, where she wanted to shop, for say, 10 minutes.

 When my sons were teens, she wanted to be a “cool” grandma and made an effort to stay current, in order to relate. I remember on one Sunday drive, she turned my guys in the backseat, who were talking music, and said, “Hey, your grandma is hip. She’s up on the pop music scene. I know the groups, “Milly Vanilla” and “Bun-Jivey!” My kids’ eyes bugged as they, jabbed each other’s ribs, spurted their sodas from every possible orifice and burst into uncontrollable waves of howling. It was days before they could look at one another without being overcome by another wave of hilarity.

 Mom completed two years of college before she married Dad. She was an avid reader and writer. She was far beyond bright. She was also somewhat naive and childlike at times, and had a unique way of erroneously repeating things the way she heard them. She really thought there were 7 humans that should be depicted in a manger scene, Baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph, The Magi and, (are you ready for this?) “Round John Virgin,” ‘nuff said.

 I’ll end this short memoir with my two all-time, what I can only label, “Mom-Manglings” of familiar clichés.” Though the resulting and unintended meanings were hysterical, the fact that she delivered them in all seriousness, made it impossible to stifle our fits of giggles.

 #1. “Don’t bite the hand that sticks its’ foot in your mouth!”

 #2. “You created your own monster…now sleep in it!”

 Oh, how I miss her…